@Darwin I left because I was really pissed at the moderation I received. Really, really pissed. I may or may not have been justified in my anger, but that’s not the point. I left because I was angry. To some degree, it was a protest, and, for that reason, I needed to see if anyone noticed, and figured out why I had gone. To their credit, one or more of the mods got it (I think it was PnL, but I don’t remember).
When they figured out who I came back as, and I guess they have ways of doing that that have nothing to do with recognizing style, they tried to talk to me about it. I tried to explain my reasoning. I’m still not sure I understood or understand why that particular question was modded, but I do understand now that different people have different opinions (although I never found out who made that decision), and that sometimes they make mistakes. It’s not that I think I’m above the law here, but I do think I should be given the benefit of the doubt in borderline cases. This was a borderline case.
Later on, I came to agree with the mods that I had overreacted. So I consider that it was a meltdown, since I don’t ordinarily react that strongly to such things. I know the world is an unfair place, but it doesn’t usually seem like the unfairness is so personal.
Anyway, I didn’t want to leave. I wanted to make a point. I really didn’t want it to be a “come back, daloon, we love you” situation. I hate it when people play that game, and I did not want to be doing that, but that’s what it turned into. Some people did come to my defense with respect to the moderation, which was nice, but far more just said I was over-reacting, and to grow up.
Unfortunately, since I had deleted my account, and because I was so pissed, I couldn’t explain what I was doing very clearly. In fact, this is my first clear explanation about it.
In any case, it seems to me that voluntary departures are a kind of message, whether protest, like me, or anger or frustration, or whatever. I think it would be useful if those messages could be more clearly stated. As in my case, it can be difficult to read the tea leaves that say why I departed.
Of course, we can’t mandate explanations, and I’m not sure whether I would call it a right for us to know, but I do think the symbolism of a departure can be and perhaps should be expressed more clearly. It shouldn’t take me this long to explain. Although, I guess one needs a certain distance in order to clarify one’s own feelings about it.
I learned a bit from the experience. I no longer try to ask single sentence questions, nor do I ask “fun” questions. I always add explanations to my questions even if they (in my opinion) are made less effective by the explanation. I just don’t even try with the fun or creative questions, even though I think they would enhance the experience here. I’m obviously in the minority about that. I know what the rules say, even if I don’t understand how they are applied, and I err on the side of placation, since I hate having a question withdrawn. It feels like I’m being told that my judgment…. well, that I’m so unutterably stupid that I shouldn’t bother to exist.
So it goes.
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