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JaclynDJ's avatar

Do guys really do the 3 day rule?

Asked by JaclynDJ (15points) June 23rd, 2009

I recently went on a date w/ a guy that I thought wasn’t interested (actually, I’m still pretty positive he just ‘wasn’t that into me’) but my brother insists that he’s probably doing the 3 day rule. I guess we’ll find out today or tomorrow (either or could be considered the 3rd day depending on when it actually starts in a guy’s mind). So regardless, I was astounded. Guys really do the 3 day rule? I’m pretty surprised if they actually take advice from a movie called ‘swingers’...

Do you guys out there really do the 3 day thing?

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26 Answers

ragingloli's avatar

what is the 3 day rule?

JaclynDJ's avatar

Where you go out on a date and the guy waits 3 days to call back. Something about not wanting to look to eager or something like that.

ragingloli's avatar

maybe he is a passive type and is waiting for you to call back.

Jack79's avatar

Never even heard of the “3 day rule”. Must be something invented in the 90s. How old are you exactly?

Yes, guys don’t want to look to eager sometimes. But once you grow up and know what you want, you call people you want to see again, and don’t care about any rules. And don’t call the ones you don’t want to see again, for the very same reason.

JaclynDJ's avatar

Well I did call him..and texted. Which he responded but he hasn’t contacted me on his own. Last time I tried him was Sunday morning…and I’m not about to keep bothering him if he’s not interested. So I was going to leave it alone at this point.

willbrawn's avatar

@JaclynDJ Good call, I would say let him make the next move. I have done the 3 day thing before. But honestly those never worked out. If I like the girl, I couldnt wait 3 days to call her again. I want to talk to her a lot. Even if its sutle.

Thammuz's avatar

I can speak for myself saying i never had this kind of problem.
Then again i have had only one girlfriend my whole life (my current one) so i’m not really an expert on the subject.

btko's avatar

Swingers is a great movie – but I don’t think many guys follow the 3-day rule. But I think most at least wait a couple days.

waterskier2007's avatar

I don’t think most of the people I know do that. I would say probably the next day later in the day i would call or something. But i feel that with texting its a lot less formal so i might be inclined to throw out a casual text or something earlier

Lupin's avatar

Ohhh… Now I get it… I thought you said “Three Date rule”. ;-)

wundayatta's avatar

It’s written down in the Official Man Code. Next to the section on farting. You can’t rely on guys from fluther to give you good advice in this area. They’re pretty odd compared to most guys, who carry the OMC in their back pockets and follow the rules without any deviation.

westy81585's avatar

I HAVE done it in the past. It’s kind of just a “wait to call” rule, more than a “3-day” rule. If you call right away you appear way too interested (even if the girl only subconsciously thinks that, it does happen).

I wouldn’t worry yet. He’ll probably call and you’ll go from there. If you’re that interested, you could try contacting him.

cwilbur's avatar

There’s a certain type of guy who is convinced that the female mind is bafflingly unknowable, inconsistent, and arbitrary. This sort of guy will have a whole bunch of rules that he lives by, some that he’s picked up on his own, some that he’s learned from other similar guys, almost as if he’s propitiating a nature goddess; some of them work purely by chance, and some of them don’t work at all, but because he’s convinced of the essential unknowableness of women, he adheres to them strictly.

And yes, that kind of guy probably has a three-day rule and adheres to it strictly.

Jack79's avatar

@cwilbur I love your answer, though you seem to be implying that the female mind is not bafflingly unknowable, inconsistent, and arbitrary. What a weird thing to say!

eponymoushipster's avatar

what’s funny, girls will complain about adherents of the “3 day rule”, yet they’ll shoot down anyone who seems eager, too.

me, i call after 6 days, because i’m money. so money.

Soapy's avatar

Yes, I have always followed the 3-day rule, most girls have always told me they were waiting for me to call sooner…but I’ll always stick to the 3-day rule. It makes me feel better that I didn’t miss a chance with a girl because I was too eager to call, but rather because she just wasn’t interested…it would kill me to find out the girl was interested but no longer because I called too soon.

Judi's avatar

Trust your gut. he’s just not into you.

jumpo7's avatar

The three day rule works both ways. If he doesn’t call you after 3 days you know he is not interested and you don’t have to waste your time. I know some women who have the “crush his interest” rule. They absolutely reject someone and wait to see if they come back.

Don’t worry there will be other guys.

wundayatta's avatar

And I suppose there must be women who write off the guy if he doesn’t call before three days. If you’re gonna play games, you get the relationships you deserve. That’s all I got to say about that.

Thammuz's avatar

@daloon I completely agree.
Like a complex nerdy language this whole thing has one problem: you get to use it only with people who would use it themselves

Bluefreedom's avatar

I’ve never even heard of the 3 day rule and it sounds a little ridiculous to me. If I go out on a date with a woman that I’m attracted to and interested in, I doubt very much that I’m going to wait 72 hours before I want to see and/or talk to her again. But that’s just me.

Soapy's avatar

@Bluefreedom .: we’re actually referring to the time between getting a girls number and contacting them the first time.

roc82's avatar

3 day rule is totally real and applies here. I wait 6.

Bluefreedom's avatar

@Soapy. Okay. Sorry for my lack of comprehension about the subject matter. Still, I’m not waiting the three days to contact her. Maybe I’m just too enthusiastic for my own good. Or I’m being overly sensible. I don’t know which.

Thammuz's avatar

@Bluefreedom Nah, you’re simply not into mind games and overthinking. That’s good for ya.

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