General Question

Zydrate's avatar

Does is seem like he just isn't interested anymore?

Asked by Zydrate (13points) June 23rd, 2009

So last Thursday, after leaving his house, his ex-grilfriend [from august], of whom I am friends with, texted me saying So i heard ya’ll were going out, when did this happen. I would had just ignored it, but I kindly answered back to her. The only problem I had with her asking if the fact they broke up in August and she’s had like 5 boyfriend’s after him…and they went out for like 2 weeks cause she got back with an ex of hers.

That night be and my bf were talking and he asked me how many bf’s i had had, i said 2 including you. He then asked me if I was a virgin, I told him I was. I thought that was weird, since he could had asked me in person but I figured he might had been embarrassed but I ignored it.

So since then, it seems he has been ignoring me, I thought he was mad at me..he said he wasn’t but pretty much yeah.
I asked him if he wanted to come over to my house today, as i’ve met his family multiple times and been to his house. He said he would if he felt good. I talked to him and it seemed like he completely forgot or just didn’t want to go. Later on he told me he’s sorry he couldn’t come over. I told him I could of came and got him, then he told me he had a headache.. :/ He seems to not want to talk to me, though today was the most we’d talken since Thursday.

So my question is…
1} What does it seem like is going on? {I know that seems weird of a question, but it’s just a confusing situation}
2} Does it seem like we isn’t wanting to be together anymore?

Also, any opinions/suggestions on this situation and to do are truely appreciated.

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19 Answers

Darwin's avatar

I am afraid that I have no idea. In fact, I am a bit confused what with all the boyfriends of the ex-girlfriend and the texting and when people broke up.

However, one possibility is that the ex-girlfriend said something to him that makes him think you are lying. Another is that he just wanted to get laid but since you are a virgin he figures that isn’t going to happen. And finally, it could just be that he has a headache and hasn’t felt well enough to socialize.

You could always give him a couple of days to feel better and then invite him to do something fun after that.

yal's avatar

maybe he is afraid to open up to you about what’s bugging him or hiding give him time and try make him open up if things dnt change then your better off dnt rush in to sex though he might only want to use you then go off and talk about it like his ex

eponymoushipster's avatar

become a nun. solves everything.

Zydrate's avatar

Definably wouldn’t rush into sex anyway. I want my first time to actually matter to me and to be with somebody I really do care for. I mean virginity is something once you lose it, it’s gone forever.

This was actually the first time anything on the lines of that had ever been brought up.

nikipedia's avatar

It sounds like your instincts are right and he’s having some doubts. Can you sit down and talk with him face to face?

Mtl_zack's avatar

I think she is tempting him, and he’s debating certain things in his head. You said that she was kinda promiscuous, and since it’s been a while for him, I guess he’s considering hooking up with her. Maybe it’s like his brain and his penis are playing chess. Maybe he feels guilty or something. If this is what he is thinking about, don’t feel pressured to have sex with him just to keep him. Do it when you’re ready.

yal's avatar

you go gurl. definatly dont give in till you fell its right. theres alot of guys out there even virgins who are saving themself for the one so you wont have shortesh if this relitionship doesnt work. good luck

Zydrate's avatar

I’ve been trying to actually talk to him face to face, as I know where some conversations are due for different types of communication.

I’m worried about that too…but i’m not sure. She’s always talking about how she’s with chris and blah blah blah, but she seems to be a bit of a whore and always unhappy with who she is with, and she seems to always go back to people she’s been with..

yal's avatar

maybe shes trying to tick you off and to give in a be a whore like she is am preety sure if chris want sex he would booty call her first and will only be doing it cuz he is horny but without love and feelings. she is being use and not sure she knows if a guy love her they would try and make her change anyway if you do end up being with chris make sure he get check up first who know what that slut is carrying

Zydrate's avatar

no chris isn’t my boyfriend, it’s the ex’s boyfriend.

I don’t know what is going on xD.
I talked to my boyfriend earlier, and yet again he was completely in a different attitude. He was acting like he used to, and then all of the sudden it turned back a really mad-seeming attitude :/

PandoraBoxx's avatar

I would suggest asking him directly what changed the dynamics of the relationship so abruptly, rather trying to second guess him. Guys are usually not as complex about relationships as girls would like to think they are, and you can waste a lot of worry by trying to second guess him. Have the conversation in person and not through text messaging.

From what you said, if I had to guess, either 1) your friend is spreading rumors about you to him in order to get him back, 2) he’s sleeping with your friend, 3) he’s only interested in a relationship with benefits, and doesn’t think that’s you, 4) As the book says, “he’s just not that into you.” 5) He’s moody. It’s much easier to just ask.

LexWordsmith's avatar

It does seem to me as if he just isn’t interested any more. Maybe it would be best to text him and say, “You don’t seem to me to have much energy available for me right now—please get in touch with me when you do.” Then the ball is in his court and you’re not wasting time and energy on someone who might not care much about you, but you’re not cutting him off or implying that you are tired of him.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

God, I hate mind games – he is not mature, neither is his ex, try to be above it and if he doesn’t want to be straight with, drop him like a hot potato

melover139's avatar

well in this sypithatical siuation he might and might not

Darwin's avatar

sypithatical ?

melover139's avatar

he might be and might not

LexWordsmith's avatar

@Darwin : i think it’s a portmanteau-word for “hypothetical and potentially syphilitic”?

Darwin's avatar

@LexWordsmith – Ah. I see. Maybe.

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