What are some cool alternative jobs titles?

Autocrat

Grand Fenwick

Magic Johnson

Gatekeeper

Consigliere

Viceroy

Chancellor
Ambassador

Capo di tutti capi.

Yiddish for matchmaker is “shadkhin” (שדכן).

Fluffer.

Baron
Kahuna

Grand Poobah

Vicar

#2

Rector

Rector? It nearky killed her.

constable
heir to the chair
party to the happenens

“Viceroy”

“Lord and Master of all that is and all that is not.”

“Padre”(Must be said as Dirty Harry would)

“Liege”

Chieftain

“The Shit”

HMS

Hippie
Punk
Emo

Wait, what kind of “alternative” are we talking about?

Nerdy computer guy
Freaky Funky Event Seeker and Planner

Space Cadet
Big Cahuna

Personally, if I ever own a business, it’s going to say this on my Door.

”O.G. Spencer R. Steck”

OG as in Original Gangster best title…ever

Colonel Ackbar von Dongburger

McAsshat

The Shocker

Vice President of All That is Unpleasant

Slavedriver

Piledriver

”(your name here): All that is Man.”

Mr. Slate
Mr. Grant
Larry Tate

Sherpa
Spiritwalker
Shaman
Porter
Bellhop
Concierge

Please do not use “Chief” as that is entirely inappropriate and could be considered offensive

I was going to say “Lord Master” but I see that has already been mentioned.
Mr. Big Man, Mr. Sir, King, Champion (okay i’m really bad at this..)

Mr. Big Stuff
She Who Must Be Obeyed
The Bad Mamma Jamma
Il Papa (or Big Poppa)

Cæsar

God of Pain

e tu AstroChuck

Going to have to make a for-all-time correction to Pooh-Bah. It’s the name of a character in Gilbert & Sullivan’s operetta The Mikado. For some reason it has accumulated a lot of variant spellings, but the name is Pooh-Bah.

Sorry I forgot the hyphen.

And, yes. I know that it’s from The Mikado. Three little maids told me so.

The Great Gazoo

Overlord (or Overlady)

He who must not be named….

@cprevite: Since Jeruba has started the trend for purity, it’s Et tu.

And it’s Brutus, not AstroChuck.
Of course if cprevite was speaking Italian then it’s okay.

Alpha Male
The Big Dog
Hero for Hire

The Big Lebowski
Supreme Leader
The Akond of Swat
The Great Gonzo
The Grand Vizier

Mr Green,
Mr Bue
Ms Red
Ms Pink
Dr Fuchsia
Mr Limegreen
Etc etc.

Big Cheese
Little Cheese
Swiss Cheese
I like cheese ok.. sawwwryy..
Mega Low Maniac
Mega High Maniac
Duke of Earl
Smashing Bloke
Rotter
Mega Monster
Prince of Platitudes
Powerful-Guy-Who-Own-Everything-In-The-Universe-And-Puts-His-Or-Her-Pants-On-BOTH-Legs-At-A-Time

Captain Big Dick.

El Boner Del Mar

Great Googly Moogly
Jimmy Page

Scarface or Tony Montana

The Peanut.

(...as in, “Don’t just be the shit. Be the peanut.”...jajdh

Slave
Assistant Slave
Temporary Assistant Slave
Temporary Intermittent Assistant Slave
Cyber Slave
Cyber Slave II

Billionaire
Billionaire philanthropist

dollionair

Governor

Great and Powerful Oz

Fuckmaster.

Funkmaster

Head Mo-Fo

The Balls

Little Miss Can’t-Be-Wrong

The Queen of Everything
The Princess of Quite a Lot

The assistant of just a bit.

The helper of a tad

The gopher of a little now and then

The Vice-President of Wishful Thinking

His Miloness
Mini-Milo

Sperminator

Augustus (or Augusta)

Or, August-lan. ;-)

Augusta Augustlan. Auggie, you’d make a great empress.

Mack Daddy. One time I actually got to name my position, I called myself the Lead Accountant since I was basically in charge of all the company’s accounting, In retrospect, I should have asked to be called the Mack Daddy of Accounting. It would have looked great on my business cards.

@AstroChuck AC, you could be the emperor… or my loyal servant.

Cæsar AstroCarolus Augustus.
I like the sound of that.

@augustlan Did you say Astrochuck could be the Idiot Savant?
(Just joking, of course. :-))

Director of Procurement

Prince of Insufficient Light
Sultan of Sin
Captain of Corruption
Prince of Prevarication
Master of Mendacity

Sultan is a good one.

Master of the Universe

Skeletor!

Pontiff
Mental Patient
Diplomat
Anesthesiologist
Politician
Game Show Host
Silversmith
Genie
Rug Merchant
Poisoner
Superhero
Oligarch
Witch
Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy
Corporal
Emperor
Drag Queen
Cage cleaner
Executioner
Factotum
Crack Ho
Master-at-Arms
Deacon
Acolyte
Lubrication Specialist
Quartermaster
Spear carrier
Head Eunuch
Starving Artist
Section Chief
Returning Champion
Supermodel
Inquisitor
Force of Nature
Men’s room attendant
Butler
Devil’s Advocate
Standard Bearer
Plutocrat
Sorcerer
Mayor
Flux Capacitor Engineer
Dean
Chancellor
Suicide Bomber
Enchantress
Vice Principal
Chamberlain
Pearl Diver
Knight in Shining Armor
Gynecologist
Vizier
Ayatollah
Virgin sacrifice
Chieftain
Centurion
Condom Salesman
Hairdresser
Nun
Top Gun
Pastry Chef
Rock Star
Flunky
Astronaut
Psycho Killer
Galley slave
Poltroon
Judge
Lackey
King of the Leprechauns
Liaison
Mediator
Arbitrager
Tyrant
Proconsul
Princess
Master Debater
Factory Rep
Squire
Madam Chairwoman
Navigator
Pool Hall Hustler
Tribune
Chief Architect
Loyal Retainer
Village Idiot
Midshipman
Snake Charmer
Gray Eminence
Ensign
Interior Designer
Mastermind
Star Ship Captain
Mullah
Guidance Counselor
Madam
Chief Detective
Steward
District Manager
Crossing Guard
Altar Boy
Jewel Thief
Substitute Teacher
Art Critic
Chief of Police
Head Usher
Mogul
Pimp
Assistant Pimp
Gumshoe
Smuggler
Camel Jockey
Unpaid Intern
Sanitation Engineer
Psychiatrist
Diva
Deep Sea Diver
Stewardess
Head Waiter
Prisoner
Dominatrix
Honored Guest
Lion Tamer
Pirate
Televangelist
Phantom of the Opera
Inspector General
Lady in Waiting
Gangsta
Second in Charge
Whistle-blower
Keeper of the Faith
Meter Maid
Arms Merchant
Bricklayer
Peacemaker
Soothsayer
Hired Gun
Tug Boat Captain
Gaffer
Professor of Chiropractic Science
Meth Cook
Geisha
Arab Linguist
Courtier
Ninja
Lottery Winner

@MontyZuma That’s what I call dedication to a cause!

And if nothing on @MontyZuma‘s list works for you, how about “Oxygen Breather”?

show-off?