General Question

The_Compassionate_Heretic's avatar

In a friendly gesture of greeting someone familiar, how long is too long to hug someone else's significant other?

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45 Answers

YARNLADY's avatar

After “ohhhh, it’s so good to see youuuuuu” let go.

Tink's avatar

I’ve hugged someone for like 3 minutes the longest, but I don’t think it was unappropriate

applesaucemanny's avatar

@YARNLADY what if they take 5 minutes to say that?

SeventhSense's avatar

When you get wood..

YARNLADY's avatar

@applesaucemanny Any unnatural stretching out of a sentence like that is suspect.

Tink's avatar

@YARNLADY what if your attracted to that person?

KatawaGrey's avatar

My general rule of thumb is to not hug until I’ve spent a little time with that person. Usually however long I spend after meeting that person is enough and then the hug lasts for no more than a few seconds. It gets longer as I get to know that person.

The_Compassionate_Heretic's avatar

@Tink1113 It’s still someone else’s SO so that would be inappropriate.

PandoraBoxx's avatar

@Tink1113, think of it this way: if your boyfriend hugs your best friend, how long should the hug take before you begin to wonder if something else is going on?

Supacase's avatar

I think @YARNLADY is on target. Maybe an extra quick squeeze or pat, but that’s it. Also, hugs with someone else’s SO are usually one-armed unless I am specifically friends with them as well.

If there is enough time for you to stand there and think, “What the hell…?” then it is too long.

casheroo's avatar

I don’t usually hug people unless I’m friends with them. I might hug the SO, but it’d be very very brief. Definitely one armed.

dannyc's avatar

When they ever so impercebtibly start to pull away, a perceptive person will, like radar, be aware of the right moment. It is a learned skill. Fumble it a few times, and your mind will remember for next time.

tinyfaery's avatar

I don’t really hug.

chyna's avatar

If there is boob groping, that is too long.

SeventhSense's avatar

When it looks like this
you hug all you want..just watch out for bad boys

The_Compassionate_Heretic's avatar

@chyna What kind of hugs have you been getting?

whatthefluther's avatar

Very brief, lean-in type hug…NO full body hug…

SeventhSense's avatar

Grandma never objected..~_~

FujiokaHaruhi192's avatar

As just a normal greeting I would say three seconds. Long enough to say hi pretty much.

filmfann's avatar

5 full seconds.
After that, it’s just groaping.

chyna's avatar

@The_Compassionate_Heretic Just those southern style hugs.

Jeruba's avatar

Well, I wouldn’t use a stopwatch, but I think about as long as it takes to move close and move apart should do it. Any more than that might make the other look a little too significant.

SeventhSense's avatar

Git ‘er Done!

Tink's avatar

@the compasionate oops didn’t know
@PandoraBoxx I don’t have one :( but I get what your saying
@SeventhSense Uhu sure ; )

Lovey_Howell's avatar

How long is too long? Milliseconds after they let go.

chyna's avatar

@SeventhSense That’s my favorite phrase. It gets me everytime.~

SuperMouse's avatar

I’m kind of in the short hug camp, especially with a member of the opposite sex who is someone else’s significant other. Now with women, I will hold a hug a good 30 seconds to a minute. With men I’m agreeing with @whatthefluther – lean in – no full body.

Bluefreedom's avatar

If the person I’m hugging is really attractive, my hug is going to last longer on that basis alone and nothing else. I’d say a 20 to 30 second hug and squeeze ought to do it. And now that you know I’m completely shameless, don’t hold it against me okay?~

rooeytoo's avatar

I think it depends on how happy I am to see the huggee.

ratboy's avatar

If you had an orgasm, it was probably too long.

janbb's avatar

@Bluefreedom Don’t hold what against you? (Sorry, couldn’t resist.)

Bluefreedom's avatar

@janbb. I walked right into that one. Thanks for the laugh. =)

PandoraBoxx's avatar

@Bluefreedom, wait a minute, I think I feel an country music moment headed this way…

Bluefreedom's avatar

@PandoraBoxx. Very nice, my friend. Lurve.

CMaz's avatar

Depends on how excited you are to meet this person. All hugs are good hugs.
Pervs aside.

StephK's avatar

I’m thinking 3–5 seconds is good.
Oh, and definitely one-armed. Call me conservative.

And if you’re attracted to them? Just don’t do it. For everyone’s sake.

nebule's avatar

just a two second hug would be nice

The_Compassionate_Heretic's avatar

@StephK 3–5 seconds doesn’t sound like a long time but hug a casual acquaintance next time the opportunity presents itself and count 1–1000, 2–1000, 3–1000 to 5. That’s a long time to be hugging someone who isn’t your partner or family member. The average person maybe makes it to 2.

StephK's avatar

@The_Compassionate_Heretic You’re right. I guess I’m still in the 12345 counting mode that I was in back when playing hide-n-seek during elementary school. 2 sounds better.

Tink's avatar

Holy crap, I totally misread this question, I thought it said how long is it appropriate to hug someone, I never saw the “someone elses” part. That completely changes my answer. Dang…..
Ok well I’d hug the person like 2 seconds just enough to say hi, and not all full body contact just one arm

Jack_Haas's avatar

I’m not a hugger but I would say anything longer than a guy’s bear hug would feel awkward.

hungryhungryhortence's avatar

I’m not a hugger of strangers but if introduced to someone’s SO and they embrace me, I will hug bag for a few seconds then retreat. I don’t like to be on the spot when that person tries to keep holding on like I’m their new pet or buddy.

cyn's avatar

@PandoraBoxx you like the bellamy brothers too? I love them…
and at least 6 seconds at the most. 2 minutes if you barely see them…

Quagmire's avatar

I’d be more concerned with how close the genital areas of both parties came to each other a LOT more then the length of the hug.

TheJoker's avatar

I’d say just a few seconds, once you’ve got your arm round, a quick squeeze, & release… job done.

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