General Question

BBSDTfamily's avatar

Do you care if your spouse looks at porn? Under what conditions?

Asked by BBSDTfamily (6824points) July 15th, 2009

Are there certain circumstances that would make you change your position? For instance, if you are 100% okay with him/her looking at porn, would you still be if he/she did not sleep with you but would rather look at porn on occasion? What are your boundaries?

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22 Answers

ragingloli's avatar

having shared interests is good for the relationship
ಡ_ಡ

augustlan's avatar

I don’t mind a bit, under the usual ‘healthy relationship’ status. If he weren’t interested in sleeping with me at all, but was regularly spanking the monkey to porn… we’d have some issues to address, but not if he occasionally wasn’t up for sex. Also, if it were an addiction of some kind, that would be a problem. Porn in a relationship should be like the icing on the cake, or maybe just the sprinkles on the icing on the cake, not the cake itself. All that said, I’m more likely to look at porn than my husband! I’ve told him he might lose his man card because of it. ~

ragingloli's avatar

@augustlan
wow
i always thought you were a guy.

MacBean's avatar

I don’t have a spouse, but if I did, I think I’d be more worried if they didn’t look at porn or at least fantasize a little. Like @augustlan said, it only becomes an issue if it’s “the cake itself.”

augustlan's avatar

@ragingloli Nope. I’m a girly.

prude's avatar

no, don’t care
in fact
wish he would!

whatthefluther's avatar

Watching porn with your lover can be fun and exciting. So too, can be watching it alone. And that is OK, provided one partner does not spend an inordinate amount of time viewing it to the point the other partner feels cheated of the viewer’s attention and affection. See ya…..wtf

OpryLeigh's avatar

Providing he is honest about it I have no problem. It’s not something that I think needs to be kept secret from your other half and I often watch porn with my partner because I enjoy it as much (if not more) as he does. Providing the porn involves consenting adults and no animals or children (I hope that goes without saying) then I am fine with it.

casheroo's avatar

If they would rather look at porn than at me, then there’s a problem. It might point to an addiction.
Other than that, I wouldn’t care. Plus, I know why my husband looks at it, and it’s usually not to get turned on…we look at it together to amuse ourselves.

knitfroggy's avatar

My husband doesn’t care about porn, which I have always thought was a little strange. When we were dating we went to a porn theater with some friends to see what it was like and he fell asleep. I like to watch it more than he does. We will watch it together once in a while, but if I ever found him watching it solo I’d be surprised, but not mad or bothered.

SirBailey's avatar

Don’t think it’s strange. I am not interested in the FAKE porn scenarios (you know. When the pizza delivery man comes to the door…) and never was. I can remember when my cousin brought over “Debbie Does Dallas” and, after a few minutes, I thought it was dumb. Fake orgasms do nothing for me. I’d rather look at the amateur stuff.

gottamakeart's avatar

I’d much rather be his favorite thing to watch (maybe I’ll slip a few nudie shots into his computer documents sometime….), but I’ve said I’m not threatened by him looking at others. Just so long as it remains only looking.

evelyns_pet_zebra's avatar

Jealousy over your partner about something as innocuous as porn is retarded. I look at porn, my wife looks at porn, and we both have a number of sex toys to keep us amused either together, or solo, when one or the other of us isn’t in the mood. A good relationship is based on trust, communication, and compassion. Everything else is the small stuff, and it doesn’t pay to sweat the small stuff.

wenn's avatar

my last girlfriend and I looked at/watched porn together once in a while. it was fun, often set us up for some fun naughty naughty time.

MindStudy's avatar

No problem with my partner watching porn at all. As mentioned, as long as it doesn’t replace our sex life, all is good.

ubersiren's avatar

I prefer my husband not look at porn. I know he does occasionally, and I can’t say I’m happy about it.

prude's avatar

@evelyns_pet_zebra agreed and I envy you and the type of sexual relationship you have, @SirBailey but it has to be the gonzo kind not something from inside a closet looking into a room w/really bad lighting and I can’t see any penetration at all
@gottamakeart s/o agrees w/your thinking as well

Facade's avatar

I don’t mind at all. He sends me stuff and I send him stuff :)

prude's avatar

@Facade that is too cool
;)

SirBailey's avatar

@Facade, send me stuff!! Send me stuff!! :)

Facade's avatar

@SirBailey only my Pookie gets those special privileges :P

Elerie's avatar

i don’t mind at all when my lady looks at porn. It’s actually nice to watch her watch porn. I myself don’t really care about watching the stuff. I like romance and stuff, not the pizza guy bonking the buyer of said pizza. Plot is good, not fake sex. And boy do i not understand those girl on girl scenes where the one girl has two inch nails! I wouldn’t let that girl within ten feet of me even if she was the last woman on the face of this earth!

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