I'm scared of sexual contact how can I get over this?

What specifically scares you? The thought of rejection?

I know he likes me but I feel scared to do anything sexual with him.

@Meagainandagin
You need to put a finger on what specifically scares you before we can offer useful advice.

it’s ok to be scared youre still just a kid. don’t feel pressured- if this person really likes you he’ll be patient and not pressure you. you probably just need time, and that’s ok. wait till your’e a little older for sex if it scares you.

Maybe it’s because I’ve never done anything with a guy before. I’m not too sure.

Treat it like jumping into a cold pool.
Take a deep breath, and dive right in.

Well of course you’ll be nervous if you’ve never done anything before, I think that’s perfectly normal. You just can’t overthink it and kill yourself worrying about all that might go wrong, because it might be awkward at first but it will still be great and enjoyable so next time just go with the flow and see where it leads you and you can always say stop if you’re just too uncomfortable!

I’ve given it a little thought.

1, I’ll feel strange kissing a guy (I’m a guy too) I think people with stare at us.
2. I’ve never done anything sexual with a guy before and I feel I should know what I’m doing by now.
3. I don’t know if I’m any good.

I’ll think a bit more.

@Meagainandagin
My guess is that you feel pressures by societal expectations. That is very normal. Try meeting him somewhere where you two would be alone. Don’t go into the situation expecting sexual contact. If it happens, it happens, if not just enjoy your time together.

I am sure the other person would understand if you are a little bit nervous. Remember, he is just a person like you, probably having the same thoughts.

If you both care about each other, nether will care if the other is any good, trust me on this one.

Send a PM to clioi he has personal experience with this situation

We’ve all had similar feelings, whether we are gay or straight or somewhere else on the spectrum. My advice is, if you like this man, and you have feelings that are strong enough toward him that you think you would like to have a sexual relationship with him, then have an open conversation with him about your fears. If he is kind, I would be willing to bet that the two of you will not only have solved the problem, but will also feel closer to one another.

Dont worry about other people. its about you and him, not what joe schmo thinks of you guys, if it bothers you that much, go somewhere private where no one else can see.

As far as the being good part, well this should be easy for you. What do you like? Chances are he likes similar things. You’re both playin with the same equipment after all :)

@Meagainandagin Take it slow and give it time. Nobody said you’re in a rush.. Just do what you feel comfortable with when you feel comfortable.
Try just cuddling first. That’s usually relaxing and sets a good mood.

Why not do something simple when you are alone with each other? Try holding hands for a bit and see how that feels.

Exactly. Start slowly, in whatever way makes you feel comfortable. If your friend cares about you, you can tell him that you’re nervous and he’ll be understanding. Even Casanova was a beginner once!

I was gonna guess troll. Hmmm.

Why don’t you try practicing on a pillow if you are worried? You can also practice on your arm, hand, etc.
Best of luck.

@Meagainandagin Do you have sexual interest? Do you feel excited when you’re around him?

Forget the pillow and self-smooching. You will either get a mouthful of cloth or skin.

@gailcalled I agree. It’s no where near the same as a real kiss anyway! i recall being a teen pretty well @Meagainandagin Do you have a friend that would make out with you?

@SpatzieLover
I have low self esteem for myself and I know I don’t like him anywhere close to how much he likes me.

This may sound strange but should I just have sex to get it over and done with so I may feel more comfortable?

@Meagainandagin Low self esteem is something you’ll need to work on prior to a relationship. Having sex with someone just to get it over with isn’t a great self-esteem booster for a female. Females become hormonally attached via sex.

No, NO, NO. Your first time (with a partner) should be wonderful and memorable and not fraught with tension and second-guessing.

I concur with @gailcalled. Don’t make love until you feel really comfortable with your partner. It’s not something to do just because other people do it. If you feel like you don’t want to, then don’t, and don’t let yourself be muscled into it, either.

If you’re not comfortable, there are several things that might help. First, inform your friend that you are new and you really want to go slow, and if he pressures you, you’ll be right out of there.

Second, read books or research it on the internet. Find out what other people do the first time, and how they felt, and, well, how it is done. Practice on yourself, and then, if you want to, practice with your friend.

If you have low self-esteem, it is understandable that you might be reluctant. Usually people with low self-esteem can’t imagine anyone else liking them or accepting their bodies. I’ve been like that. I couldn’t imagine anyone actually wanting to sleep with me. Even after I’d done it many times, I still felt that way.

What I need is reassurance. I need to know my body is not repulsive and that my sexual apparatus is acceptable. Maybe even beautiful. I’m so certain that everyone is better looking and better endowed than I am. Check out the discussion on penis size if you want to be depressed—women seem to be “size queens,” so to speak. There are plenty of such people in the gay community, too.

I think that if I were young again, I would want to tell my inadequacies to my partners. If they still wanted me, after that, I would feel more reassured. I would also tell them that I need constant reassurance—about my body, and about me. I hope it gets better for you; I’ve been having this problem for nigh onto 35 years.

Good luck!

Kissing doesn’t mean is has to lead to more. I was terrified when I had my first kiss. As long as you’re confident to say no to more until you’re ready, I recommend tame smooching! Keep the lights on! Keep the door open!

@trailsillustrated I didnt know 19 was a kid, I thought 18 was an adult legally

Legally and mentally are not the same thing.

@Sarcasm You are right, I dont think you are a kid usualy at 16

Emotional maturity varies just as the arrival of puberty or wisdom teeth. Many males at 16 are usually still boys. ( Note I said “Many” and not “all.)

Mental acuity is different from emotional growth.