General Question

eadinad's avatar

Does your partner have to share your life interests?

Asked by eadinad (1278points) February 12th, 2008

For any of you who have a career or a hobby that you are passionately interested in, and will be involved in for the rest of your life, how much would your partner have to care about /support your interests for you to feel okay about it?

Would they have to participate? Would they have to talk with you about it? Would it be enough if they made an effort to be interested in it, or even just pretended to be? Would it ever be a dealbreaker?


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9 Answers

jrpowell's avatar

I am a total nerd that makes BEAM robots for fun…

My girlfriend doesn’t care as long as it doesn’t become an obsession.

She doesn’t have to support me… She just needs to give me a few hours a week to nerd out with my soldering iron.

paulc's avatar

Nah, me and my wife have some interests that intersect but also many that don’t. It kind of makes it interesting but if there was too little likeness it could be problematic I guess. Like jonpowell says though, each has to let the other do their own thing.

Mangus's avatar

Common passionate interest isn’t necessary. Support for each others’ endeavors is. You should each be able to appreciate the other’s drives and passionate interests, at least enough so that you have the emotional capacity to care and provide support when the other needs it in the tougher struggles to achieve their goals and dreams.

Lack of willingness to lay out that support—that’s the dealbreaker to look out for.

Spargett's avatar

Not at all. I think dating another version of me would be really boring.

cwilbur's avatar

I think a partner needs to understand that the interest is important. And it helps considerably to have some shared interests.

vanguardian's avatar

We share some common interests that developed through our relationship. Other than that, complete opposites. She sometimes does not like the fact that I am a professional fashion photographer and am around not only beautiful women but women with a more common interests. The support is there through love for me not through happiness.

jeffnearlife's avatar

I’ve found that it’s really cool to be with people who don’t share all your interests. The key is…do they take an interest in some of the things that you’re interested in. I dated a young lady for awhile who liked international stuff and international food. I found that I really enjoyed taking on this interest that I wouldn’t have gone for before I dated her.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

Of course it’s important to me that he is interested in what I’m passionate about – after all, this is a passion and that’s a pretty strong word, for me. It is also very important to me that he have a passion as well, it doesn’t at all have to be anything similar but it has to blend well in that if I’m all about non-profit work and he’s all about screwing people over with corporate soul-selling irresponsibility, we wouldn’t be together

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