How to make a graceful getaway from a nightmare boss?

I don’t think I’d worry too much about burning a bridge that leads to hell. Get another job and move out.

That is a hard way to live.

Pack you stuff and get away.

If you get to Milwaukee let me know. I live there and maybe can help.

You are being kept in indentured servitude. You need to get out right now. Consider that their word to you has been broken so your word to them is no null and void.

Do not give this man as a reference. Say that you were “working on remodelling projects in the Tampa Fl area.”

Get the fuck out.

This is ridiculous. Fuck his feelings, he doesn’t care about you. Don’t care about him.

And if you get to Portland I have a heated basement with a spare futon.

When you find something you like give two weeks notice. You must do what is best for you. I made the mistakes of being loyal to my old boss. I turned down a better job . For a promotion which did not work out because he asked me to. PUT YOURSELF FIRST !!!!

As Marina has said, this is indentured servitude. You need to get out of this situation; it is comparable to being an abused foster child. I wouldn’t look for another job first, find someone you can stay with and tell these people you are moving on. When you are in an abusive situation, don’t worry about your word, worry about your sanity. Use us for support as you need it.

Can you tell him your mom/dad/brother/cousin/whoever needs you to move in with them in another city? That is a good way to get out gracefully and, hopefully, get your belongings back.

If that isn’t possible, how important are your belongings? I would take the essentials and get the hell out of dodge. There are other ways to scrape by. How old are you? What do you mean you were ran out of Portland? Some additional details may help us give you some suggestions on how to get by after you get out of this situation – but getting out is the first thing you need to do.

Even undocumented workers(immigrants) get paid, why shouldn’t you?
Make your current boss realize that times are tough and you need to be earning so much in order to live now and for the future. If he can’t provide you with that, then it’s time to shake hands and part ways.

As far as previous employment history, you can always say that due to the bad economy, you had a hard time getting a steady job. The fact that you got p[aid incash and kind and didn’t get paid with a check that required the employer to report Social Security taxes makes your work history untreacable by going through the regular channels. If you have to, list the time as a freelancer.

Sounds more like slavery to me. It’s illegal to not pay you minimum wage. You need help—maybe from a lawyer; maybe from a counselor. This is not a healthy situation. What is stopping you from leaving? And I don’t mean money? What, in your head, is stopping you? Do you have any relatives or friends who would give you plane fare home? Or wherever?

@TheLoneMonk – I’ll be staying a few blocks south of the UWM main campus. After I get my things, I’ll consider it, as I won’t have a few things I can pawn for a ticket home, but no place to stay.

@johnpowell – Thanks for the offer, but I have an old friend who lives close to PDX who’s already offered.

@Supacase – That’s a good idea. I’ll ask some people if they can get “sick” or “fired” or something. And I want my stuff back because that’s what he took – my luggage bag in Milwaukee has all my warmwear, most of my clothes, my paperwork like photo ID, passport, birth certificate, school papers, and some electronics I’m planning on pawning when I get there. We’re leaving in less than a week.

As for the other questions, I’m 22, and I was kicked out of my apartment because my landlady was getting paranoid I was going to call the fire department about the hundreds of paint cans and other flammables she had improperly stored after I warned her, as well as thinking my mother, her friends, and myself were all ganging up to “get her”. It was hard to find work because I was let go from my temp position right after thanksgiving despite being told by my manager that the factory I was working in said they wanted me for themselves. This happened in tandem with getting severe tendinitis in my right elbow and my mother’s car half-dying. I had no car, no home, a bum elbow, and didn’t want to stay in Portland because of the blizzard that happened December of last year.

@njnyjobs – Not having to report taxes is the reason he would only let me work for cash. He’s one of those who-gives-a-damn-about-the-roads, privatize everything style libertarians that has millions but hates it when he loses pennies. It took him 2 months, he wormed his way into convincing me to accept payment as with free rent, utilities, and food, as long as he gets to control where I live, what I could use, and what I could eat.

@daloon – Yours is the hardest to respond to. It’s threefold – First, I have a hard time saying no to people I have vested emotions in. I didn’t have much of a hard time saying no to this guy and his lackey, aka. my former roomie at first. Second, after about half a year, I realized that I was swapping beers and life stories with this guy. He had helped me break the prime taboo of the work world – your employers and employees do not become friends, period. Third – Because I have a hard time saying no to personal relationships, and they had wormed their way into my life so completely, they herded me so that I would give them some of my power to choose for myself.

And yes, my mom has offered to give me bus fare home, but I’ve borrowed enough from her so that I can get a few basic things like new socks and a couple of long sleeved shirts; that’s why I;m pawning off a few useless things dragging me down when I get to Milwaukee to get my things back.
(p.s. – nice cheeks ^_^)

This is why I like people. You reach out and there will usually be someone there to help pull you back form the abyss. It took me a long time to realize there was a problem, but from your input, I can see just what a problem it’s become.

Well, I managed to get away from the bastard. In the end my mom bought a bus ticket, and I managed to convince the the boss to let me stay in his house for a week unmonitored, used that time to disappear online, change my number, then I just got on a bus and left. I think he must’ve had me brainwashed, because once I got away from him, everything came rushing back and I realized just how stupid the whole thing was. So, I’m safe and sound in Portland staying with some friends of friends whom I know I can trust. Thanks for the deprogramming everyone.

@Fenris I am so glad to hear that you got away! I am hoping that you can get your things back. Your ID and such.

@Fenris Glad to hear it too.

@Marina Yeah I got them, but I had to leave half my toiletry kit and some old clothes behind. The ID and such were in Milwaukee, but Stephan was getting suspicious of my trying to take my entire life to Milwaukee in one bound, so I left the non-essentials behind. I felt really scruffy after two weeks without bathing or shaving though.