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raquel123's avatar

Do I truly love my boyfriend?

Asked by raquel123 (9points) February 2nd, 2010

I have been dating my boyfriend for 2 years and 5 months. He is currently a freshman in college and I am a senior in highschool. The long distance relationship has not been too hard for us because we see each other usually once a month. However, there is this guy at my school that I have had a crush on since I was 12 and he never liked me. He has a girlfriend as well and he is suddenly flirting with me a lot, and I secretly am enjoying it. I am committed to my boyfriend, and I don’t understand what’s going on. Help??

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13 Answers

PandoraBoxx's avatar

Perhaps it’s fun for both of you because it won’t go anywhere. Sometimes flirting becomes the dynamic of the relationship.

HTDC's avatar

That’s a question only you can answer.

Oxymoron's avatar

Well, I’m going to say that you probably don’t love him. Or if you do, not very much. Most people who love their significant other will remain faithful to them. I know you aren’t cheating, I just mean flirting with other people. If you were happy, you wouldn’t need attention from this other guy. Also, you wouldn’t have a crush on anyone else.

Blackberry's avatar

No, you don’t.

Spinel's avatar

There is lust and love. Both are possible at the same time. It is possible to love someone from the bottom of your heart and yet find an acquaintance attractive. Your relationship with the college dude sounds stronger. Your attraction to the high school dude sounds more like just joy that he is finally acknowledging you.

Besides, the fact that you describe your attraction to him as a “crush” does not signify true love. If you really loved this guy, you would not be hesitating to this extent. And I guarantee you would use a much stronger term than just “crush” to communicate real and true love.

The situation with your college guy sounds much more stable.

Holden_Caulfield's avatar

If you have to ask, then there is doubt. My answer would be no.

El_Cadejo's avatar

yea that^

Your_Majesty's avatar

Try to Investigate his real intention first. He could just try to be polite to any nice girl he met. I think you can try to be his good friend first(I repeat ‘only good friend’). At the same time you can still go on with your boyfriend. This is just in case,if your relationship with your boyfriend isn’t go so well then you could run to this man-who-take-your-heart but first try to investigate him again,especially his relationship with another girl (so he can’t takes advantage from you). If he’s available(single),then you could easily go on with him since you two has become good friend and he really wants you.

-You never two-timing with other man since he is just your good/best friend.
-Feel free to enjoy when he flirts you,even if your boyfriend know he can’t blame you. He can’t force your personal emotion,and it isn’t your fault.
-There’s nothing wrong for beings opportunistic once in your life.

plethora's avatar

Don’t be “committed” to anyone at 17. You should be dating all you want. Nailing down lifelong committments at 15 (or 17) is utterly ludicrous. You are not the person you are going to be. It may be that time will confirm that the two of you will marry, but you sure as hell should not be making that committment to a relationship now. Date the new guy.

Tenpinmaster's avatar

I agree with @plethora You shouldn’t feel obligate to not date anyone else and experience other types of people. Sometimes experiencing relationships with other people really puts things in perspective. You might date and find out that you really love this guy because he makes you feel better then anyone else, or you might find someone else that fits more of what you need in life at this moment. Of course, such decisions are up to you.

Sophief's avatar can’t truly love your boyfriend.

ilvorangeiceblocks's avatar

You want to love both of them. You don’t love either of them though.

zenmaster1414's avatar

That depends- how big of a crush do you have on this other guy? Would you break up with your boyfriend for this other guy? I think if the crush is that serious, you should probably talk to your boyfriend. You have to have trust and truth in relationships, so if he has no idea about this other guy, you should probably talk to him about it.

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