Social Question

stardust's avatar

Sex with a new guy - how long should one wait?

Asked by stardust (10544points) February 5th, 2010

Do you think there’s a general timeline one should follow when it comes to having sex for the first time with a new guy?
Or do you think it’s better to go with feelings, ignoring the time frame?

Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

32 Answers

mowens's avatar

The trick is not ever making the first move.

Trust me. It works.

Blackberry's avatar

1 to 3 days is good, depending on what type of relationship you guys want lol.

SeventhSense's avatar

Go with your gut but never on the first date. If its that strong it’s just chemical and will spell nothing but trouble for getting to know this person in a meaningful way.

marinelife's avatar

Go with your feelings. See how the relatrionship is progressing.

Are you learning about him as a person?

Do you feel you have a future with him?

Does it feel right and special?

mowens's avatar

Oh, and say you are not read at least on two different dates.

Even if you are.

Cruiser's avatar

Depends entirely what you want out of this union….do what feels best for you is all. What works for me may be entirely different for you.

Silhouette's avatar

I’d wait until we were alone. :D My husband of 31 years and I waited until our second date.

eponymoushipster's avatar

wait til the last guy left.

slick44's avatar

How hot is the new guy?

Dan_DeColumna's avatar

Never. Sex is evil. (SARCASTIC)

HungryGuy's avatar

Go with your feelings.

filmfann's avatar

First date for me and my wife, and we’ve been married 25 years, but that isn’t the norm.
I would wait until you are sure this is someone you want to be close to.

SeventhSense's avatar

@Dan_DeColumna
A tilde ~ will suffice

Dr_Lawrence's avatar

After 6 months of an internet relationship, we met in person and made love that first night.

aprilsimnel's avatar

As long as both of you are honestly and openly communicating about what you’re looking for out of your relationship, whenever you two agree to.

eponymoushipster's avatar

just make sure the money is off the nightstand. you wouldnt want him to know you charged the last guy less.

SeventhSense's avatar

@eponymoushipster
ohhh snap… oh no you din’t

mrentropy's avatar

If you’re 18 or over I don’t think it matters much anymore. Although you may get a “reputation.”

If you’re under 18 then wait until you’re 40.

Dr_Lawrence's avatar

You should wait at least until you have removed each others clothing!

Zaku's avatar

Unless you are just going for sex, I would wait until you know more about the guy and how you get along than initial attractions and all. Sex creates a chemical relationship that has many effects, one of them being on brain chemistry, which messes with a person’s perceptions of someone.

Violet's avatar

A couple weeks

wundayatta's avatar

If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a thousand times. 73 hours, 23 minutes and 11 seconds. No more. No less.

When will they learn to look it up first? When? [rolls eyes heavenward]

HungryGuy's avatar

At least 10 minutes…

odali's avatar

Depends what you want out of the relationship.

Kokoro's avatar

I would definitely suggest to go with the feelings, but be aware of infatuation. Go with your feelings, but think with your gut and your head.

odali's avatar

head and heart are often conflicted though, think too much and you could be left alone, think too little, and you could be in a shitty relationship its all about finding the balance

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

Fact from fiction, truth from diction. Wait? People still do that? Well to time date myself when I was young you never expected to get any until about 6 months of hard work, and not even to 2nd base until about 8 weeks of dating. Any girl you could get in bed under 2 weeks well…...........lets just say you would not take them home to mom as any gal you were serious about.

onesecondregrets's avatar

When it feels right. Go with feelings but don’t get caught up in the charm of him, or the situation. Don’t overthink it. Don’t be pressured into it. If you feel comfortable, and safe- go for it. If anything hints to you it’s not the right time, go with that time and don’t be afraid to say wait.

I have problems with this.

AlienBomber's avatar

Make him wait 3 months. Then when he can’t take any more, do his friend! Right in front of him!

SeventhSense's avatar

^ Then he’ll kill you and you won’t have to worry about sex anymore.

Response moderated (Spam)
jessiemay25's avatar

When you feel comfortable, I waited til the third date because I wanted to move on from my ex and the guy was so damn attractive..usually I would only sleep with someone once we were in a relationship. I asked myself am I prepared for this? What if he doesn’t speak to me again? and made sure that I would be ok with myself regardless of what happened afterwards. If you are doing it solely for you than there is no right or wrong number.

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