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sriggs09's avatar

should I let my friend (who is a heroin addict but trying hard to quit) move in with me

Asked by sriggs09 (21points) March 4th, 2008 from iPhone

I have a friend who is trying to quit heroin. He goes to n.a. And a.a. Meeting with me and has been a close friend for years. He was living with his mother, step dad, and brother( who Is also a addict). His mother killed herself a couple days ago. He really needs am enviorment change and i’m wondering if I should help.

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15 Answers

squirbel's avatar

As long as you understand it is a great responsibilty. I don’t have firsthand experience, but I imagine someone fighting the good fight will be very dependent.

Sit and talk with him, and make your reasons and rules clear—same as you would do with any roommate. Good luck, and I hope everything works out positively!

djbuu's avatar

absolutely not! your home is not somewhere anybody can come and live. trying really hard to quit or not, the addiction he has is not your problem. letting them move in will soon make it your problem. i realize this person has gone through a lot but change doesn’t come from some sudden environment shift. this person needs to look internally.

PupnTaco's avatar

Only for a short, enforceable amount of time – and no drugs or he’s out.

If you have kids – no way.

ezraglenn's avatar

Moving in with you could be of great help to him in terms of getting off the drug, but it will come at a huge emotional and physical cost to you, and you have to know that.
Did he ask you if he could move in or are you thinking of asking him to?

simone54's avatar

You should know not to get your hopes up for anything. He’s not going to stop using. I’ve seen it before. That is how it is.

afghanmoose's avatar

there are so many factors,if your ready to put up a good fight,lay down the rules right away with rent,food,cleaning,chores,and no drugs friends who r dealers ad users that enforce drugs on your friend for a good time.keep things organized to help him to get used to regular life.good luck,keep us posted

glial's avatar

Although it may seem like a noble thing to do, would say no.

cwilbur's avatar

No. If you let him move in, his heroin problem becomes your heroin problem, and while he can work on his problem if he is so inclined, you cannot.

If he backslides, are you willing either to allow him to keep his drugs in your house and shoot up there or to kick him out without a home? If the answer is “no,” then you shouldn’t let him move in.

Sneakerfreak503's avatar

I dont know this guy but judgeing from my experience with addicts I would say he values the drug more than your friendship. That being said I think the answers pretty obvious. NOPE! Letting him in your house is basically asking 4 so many problems I dont want 2 write them all cuz I’ll b here all day.

artemisdivine's avatar

sure let him live with you. its the christian thing to do.

that being said tell him there will be unannounced bunk searches and if you find ANY drugs of his that you will toss him out on his ass. if he REALLY wants to see what it it like to rough it, he should try living in a shelter. that might wake him up. i would draw up a written contract for living with you to cover yourself somewhat. dont forget if he doesnt have a job, having a second person there will involve buying more food, more utilities etc. make a list of chores HE must do in order to stay.

cwilbur's avatar

See, I wouldn’t be willing to do the unannounced bunk searches; and I expect, having known addicts in the past, that if he knew I was going to search his room and belongings for drugs, he’d just hide them somewhere else. No contract is going to adequately protect you if his dealer comes around with a knife looking for the money he’s owed, or if the police come with a search warrant because someone saw him buying drugs. And if he has no job, taking him in is an even huger responsibility.

Making sure he has adequate food, clothing, and shelter is the Christian thing to do. And the charitable thing, for the atheists and secular humanists. Putting yourself, your home, and your family at risk is not required.

afghanmoose's avatar

Get him a place in the church,an even more Christian thing to do

MissAnthrope's avatar

How good of a friend is he?

My parents took in my cousin in order to help her get off heroin. If you’re close like family, I might consider it, knowing that boundaries must be set and that I’m probably asking for trouble. If you’re not good friends, try to help them find a place to go.. what kind of rehab facilities/programs do you have in your area?

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