General Question

shorty's avatar

Who knows all Ten Commandments?

Asked by shorty (244points) March 4th, 2008 from iPhone
Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

9 Answers

kevbo's avatar

Thou shalt not doubt Chuck Norris’ fighting ability.
Thou shalt not utter falsities about Chuck Norris.
Thou shalt watch thy back in Texas.
Thou shalt vote Huckabee.
Thou shalt heartily accept roundhouse kicks.
When visiting Chuck Norris, thou shalt use his toilet paper.
Thou shalt proclaim the manliness of Chuck Norris’ beard.
Thou shalt pay homage to the Texas Ranger badge.
Thou shalt visit the official website.
Thou shalt accept the fact that Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

Originally there were 20 Commandments but Chuck ate the second stone tablet as a snack afte he finished hashing things out with God. By the way, Commandments 11–20 let Chuck Norris do what he wants.

jrpowell's avatar

I do.. I don’t agree with all of them..

I would replace #1 “I am the LORD your God, you shall have no other gods before me.” with “Don’t bible thump Fluther.”

ezraglenn's avatar

I know all of them from spending nine years in Jewish day school.

gailcalled's avatar

Thou shalt not ask idiotic questions.

And my private list:

1) Thou shalt help build a Habit-for-Humanity house.

2) Thou shalt adopt a less-than-perfect-baby if thou espouses the Right-

3) Thou should give thy guest room to a homeless person.

4) Thou shalt be a big brother/sister to an inner-city kid.

5) Thou shalt teach English-as-a-Second-Language to those in need.

6) Thou shalt teach the illiterate how to read.

7) Thou shalt give the Enron and Worldcom stockholders and former employees
a tithe.

8) As thou art running thy AC at full blast, thou shalt consider global

9) If thee has more than two house, thou shalt give one away.

10) Thou shalt be an advocate for more bike paths in urban areas and get on
one, occasionally, thyself.

DorkmanScott's avatar

Which Ten? The “Ten Commandments” are listed three times in the Bible. Exodus 20, Exodus 34, and Deuteronomy 5. Deut. 5 is a recap of Exodus 20, but Exodus 34 presents a different set of ten, including “The feast of unleavened bread shalt thou keep in the month when the ear is on the corn” and “Thou shalt not seethe a kid in its mother’s milk.”

So the question is, does GOD even know all Ten Commandments?

cwilbur's avatar

I also know the Seven Cardinal Virtues, the Seven Deadly Sins, and the Seven Liberal Arts. Do I get a gold star for Sunday School today?

Seriously, I refer you to Matthew 6:1–8, and advise you to consider whether you’re doing something constructive or destructive by Bible-thumping.

Besafe's avatar

how is asking this question bible thumping – it may activate ones conscience but I didn’t see that as bible thumping. I think the person was just making people think about the reality that God wrote a moral law on our hearts but that we don’t follow them. Think about it and think about what that means in regard to your eternal futher. And as you do reflect on the reason for the Easter season. Listen to your consciece and be honest with yourself.

DorkmanScott's avatar

“I think the person was just making people think about the reality that God wrote a moral law on our hearts but that we don’t follow them.”

-Maybe because it’s not a proven reality? Is, in fact, in conflict with observable reality?

“And as you do reflect on the reason for the Easter season.”

-You mean the pagan fertility rituals celebrating the beginning of spring?

“Listen to your consciece and be honest with yourself.”


Besafe's avatar

not a proven reality—then why do you know when you have done wrong, and why do you fear that there might be a God who has a moral standard you do not meet. I find it interesting that most of us work hard at dismissing what our inner person knows is true and are so focused on the NOW and do not honestly consider the reality that there could be a life that does not end and honesty seek answers to questions about the reality beyond the NOW. We put our faith in science, politics, and our minds.

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