General Question

jealoustome's avatar

What is the most embarrassing combination of items to purchase at the supermarket checkout?

Asked by jealoustome (1514points) February 23rd, 2010

I once bought condoms, tampons and personal lubricant with no cover items like milk, eggs and cheese. The clerk tried not to laugh as he scanned them. What would you buy for maximum blushworthiness?

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48 Answers

TheLoneMonk's avatar

Miller High Life, Draino, 2 gallons of Ice Cream and a shower cap…II’m going in…

seeing_red's avatar

KY, cucumber, peanut butter and wine in a box.

chyna's avatar

Tampons and chocolate.

ldeb's avatar

im really curious about how people answer this one

jealoustome's avatar

@chyna I’ve done that many times. It seems I’m a walking embarrassment. :)

janbb's avatar

Immodium and toilet paper

borderline_blonde's avatar

@janbb just took my answer! Too fast! :)

You’d have to put at least six or seven items in between the items for the checkout person to not make the connection.

Grisaille's avatar

KY, cucumber, peanut butter and wine in a box.

erichw1504's avatar

Huge bottle of lotion, tissues, and a copy of Field and Stream.

…oh, and some blister cream.

janbb's avatar

@Grisaille Hot date with seeing red?

whatthefluther's avatar

A disposable plastic drop cloth, a large bottle of baby oil. a can of real whipped cream, assorted batteries and some candles. Actually, that should not be embarrassing, but will likely be met with sly smiles, or eager, inquisitive looks. See ya….Gary/wtf

daemonelson's avatar

A blonde wig, a jar of vaseline, bubble gum, a kilogram of lard and a spoon.

Oh, and a bible. Any purchase is made awkward in some way by adding a bible.

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

KY, cucumber, and kitty litter.

janbb's avatar

@whatthefluther Hope you and sherry enjoyed it!

seeing_red's avatar

@Grisaille I’m flattered. =)

Cruiser's avatar

Cap’n Crunch and Chocolate syrup….time for an intervention!! lol!

chyna's avatar

@aprilsimnel Not sure what the heck that fifth item is.

aprilsimnel's avatar

It’s a “power” plunger. It’s not real, but if it were, can you imagine the looks you’d get if that was with the other stuff?

Arisztid's avatar

Wine in a box, rope, whipped cream, condoms, clothes pins, KY jelly.

Add a Bible for the disturbing factor.

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

A tongue depressor and duct tape…uh,am I at the right store??

neverawake's avatar

i think adult diapers would probably be the most embarressing.

Keysha's avatar

I’d say a large zucchini, KY Jelly, a douche, and a bicycle air pump.

La_chica_gomela's avatar

One time I checked out with: the huge size of toilet paper, tampons, advil, rubber gloves, and nothing else.

Yes, it was my period, I was dying my hair purple, and I was about to run out of TP. Duh.

Vunessuh's avatar

Dog treats and whip cream.

erichw1504's avatar

A box of condoms, a bike pump, and a tub of strawberry jelly.

SuperMouse's avatar

Vodka and Twinkies

VohuManah's avatar

A package of fluff, towels, three bananas, and the latest issue of “Teen Vogue.”

Likeradar's avatar

Wine, flowers, and duct tape.

It started a nice conversation with the guy in line in front of me.

Haleth's avatar

@likeradar Hahaha, awesome.

One night when I was waiting tables, I bought a pint of ice cream and a bottle of wine after my shift ended. This guy who was in line in front of me cracked a joke about me being a frustrated single cat lady. I was like, “I don’t even have cats, asshole!” and he said, “Ooh. ZING.”

LunaChick's avatar

KY jelly, handcuffs (Walmart sells them in the toy dept. don’t ask me how I know), candles, a belt and a zucchini.

Supacase's avatar

A boyfriend and I ran into a grocery store late at night to pick up some things we needed for our hotel stay: beer, condoms, a toothbrush and a pack of razors.

UScitizen's avatar

A liter of whiskey, a dozen condoms, a ten pack of CDs, daily, at the same store, for months on end. After two weeks, I was know there as “Epic whiskey drinking 12 fuck 10 CD man.”

ucme's avatar

Doggie treats, strap on dildo, a copy of the dvd How to teach your dog new tricks.“Tracey,how much is the strap on, do we do discount?

thriftymaid's avatar

To many combinations are possible; I say start early and go to different stores.

mattbrowne's avatar

I think the combination of diapers and quality condoms could be embarrassing.

Interpretation 1: our baby is giving us a hell of a time, never again
Interpretation 2: our last condoms failed and this is why we need diapers

jealoustome's avatar

After reading all of these wonderful responses, I’ve decided I would be more embarrassed to have the clerk know I was constipated and intended to do something about it than to know I was going to have some kinky sex. So, my most embarrassing item combination would be:

Tucks Medicated Wipes, Metamucil, Prune Juice, A 24-Pack of Extra Strong Charmin, and a Reader’s Digest

GladysMensch's avatar

I prefer confusing to embarrassing:
All the ChapStick (classic flavor only) and combination padlocks in the store.

As you’re being rung-up, quietly ask the cashier “would you happen to have more ChapStick or padlocks in back?”

stratman37's avatar

My brother was on a tampon run for his wife, and anybody else would be a little embarrassed to walk up with that item.

Not my brother.

He saw a guy in front of him asking for a Penthouse and he said “Hey buddy, what’s ya got there? A magazine? Look here, I’ve got a real woman waiting on me when I get home!”

SuperMouse's avatar

After reading through this thread, I remembered a guy who came in to the hotel gift shop where I worked. This was a businessman looking fellow, who was most likely staying at the hotel, he came in and bought a cigar and Preparation H. I’ll never think of that combo the same way again.

ldeb's avatar

@supermouse aw poor guy

jealoustome's avatar

@SuperMouse I don’t think I will think of those the same either.

CyanoticWasp's avatar

Playboy magazine and paper towels didn’t make the list yet?

toomuchcoffee911's avatar

A pregnancy test and a clothes hanger.

Notice the question asks “to purchase” not “you’ve purchased”.

lillycoyote's avatar

A pack of cigarettes and a disposable enema.

The cigarettes were for me, the enema was not.

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