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Kokoro's avatar

How long did it take for you to "get over" your first love?

Asked by Kokoro (1424points) March 1st, 2010

What helped you through it? How do you feel about it now?

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32 Answers

ducky_dnl's avatar

He passed away nearly two months ago and I don’t feel any different from when I first met him. I still love him 3,000,000,000,000% and just hope he knows that now.

Word of advice: If you feel something for someone, tell them.

nebule's avatar

a year and finding out that I was deluded… he didn’t love me at all

wundayatta's avatar

Two to three years. It was horrible.

janbb's avatar

Still think about him and miss him; wonder what he’s doing now. It’s only been 39 years since I’ve seen him!

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

It took awhile I don’t know how long.He still calls me from time to time.I am definitely over it and have been for years ;)

Cruiser's avatar

Took me a couple months to get over the shock of the breakup and really a year or two to get past that feeling of what you thought love was supposed to be all about.

Lothloriengaladriel's avatar

I think it’s hard but you have to remind yourself why you’re no longer together. I’m not sure how long exactly but after being with my ex (the relationship I got into after him) for about 7 months I think I could of honestly said I was over it at that point. You won’t forget them, especially if you’re staying in contact but soon enough feelings will die out and you will have those same, and more feelings for the next person..

njnyjobs's avatar

2 weeks . . . after I met another one, I moved on with the present. No sense in dwelling with the unwanted feeling. After 15 years, we bumped into each other and exchanged pleasantries….and heartaches….. but the good thing is, now we’ve been keeping tabs.

MissAnthrope's avatar

I was really, really in love and felt we were soulmates. We’d been friends for years and the relationship was pretty damn amazing until the end. She ended it because she was very close to her fundamentalist Christian mom and couldn’t take lying to her anymore about dating me. She then declared to her friends that she was straight, which I felt totally negated what we’d had together (though now, I see it in a more rational light and I kind of understand it).

It took me several months to get over the depression and shock of feeling like my heart had been ripped out of my chest. After the initial pain and suffering faded, it still took me about two years to get over her.

trocado's avatar

Two to three years.

anarekist's avatar

took me 5 years :( but now i love my new gf so it’s all good.

hug_of_war's avatar

4 months to feel like I could function/interact somewhat normally with others. 8 months until I felt like me again, until I didn’t think of him anymore. I kept insanely busy and threw myself into work. Now I am glad he broke up with me though it was bloody horrible at the time. I felt like I was dying but everyone expected me to do what I normally did. Memories of him have faded but the pain of the breakup is something I’m still dealing with. I don’t miss him at all now (3.5 years ago).

autumn43's avatar

It’s been 28 years. Can I get back to you? He’ll always have a special place in my heart. Don’t get me wrong, I eventually married and have been for 23 years. Have a great life with two kids. However, always wonder what could have been, etc. I think it’s natural. I certainly don’t think about him all the time. Just when I see something that reminds me of him or hear a song. Or a question like this is asked. It’s okay. It’s good to see where we came from and how we have grown.

partyparty's avatar

I would think about 6 months to get over it, but I always have fond memories because it was my ‘first’ love.

dogkittycat's avatar

It took 4 months then I was fine, there’s still a time when a memory we shared comes back but I’m starting to go out with a new guy and I’ve been feeling great.

davidbetterman's avatar

I still haven’t…and that was 35 years ago. But life goes on, so you learn to put her away and maybe we will run into one another at an old fogies home 35 years hence.

Aethelwine's avatar

The second I met my husband I knew I was over my first love. It makes me wonder if I ever really loved him (my first). Honestly, I feel that my husband is my first love because I have never felt what I feel for him with anyone else.

ZEPHYRA's avatar

Never did!

stump's avatar

Deedee Thomas was 5 and I was 6 years old. She was the first girl I ever held hands with. She died of some disease over the summer before second grade. I still think about you, Deedee. XXXOOO

neverawake's avatar

A millisecond.

sjmc1989's avatar

My first love and I dated for over 2 years and the only reason we broke up was because I moved away the end of my junior year. I continued to think about him for 2 years until I saw him and he had went down the wrong path and looked awful. I always told him he needed to get his shit together. I never stop loving him through the years though and he continued to keep in contact with me, but it killed me to know he had changed so much from the boy that I fell in love with. He called me a couple days ago and said he had moved away from our hometown 4 months ago and had gotten completely clean. He is doing what he loves to do and sounds like the guy I used to love. He says he never quit loving me and we are working on getting to know each other again. We have been talking everyday since then. So to answer you question I don’t think I ever have gotten over him.

casheroo's avatar

I’d say it was minimum a year. I fell madly in love with the next guy I dated which was a year and some months later. Ahhh high school.

filmfann's avatar

36 years ago, and my heart still jumps when I talk to her.

liminal's avatar

I never get over people I love. They always stay a part of me.

partyparty's avatar

@filmfann Aw that is really lovely after all this time.

autumn43's avatar

@filmfann – it sure is! Lucky you. And she’s lucky too!

Shecky_Johnson's avatar

Still working on it, going on 15 years now.

filmfann's avatar

“Lucky”? We broke up 36 years ago. How is that healthy?

autumn43's avatar

@filmfann – well, I obviously thought you had gotten married. I would never have said ‘lucky you!’ (((filmfann))) Sorry.

Neizvestnaya's avatar

About 20 years.

talljasperman's avatar

15 years. Finally I moved on.

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