What story do you tell most often?

I don’t have a “story” to tell as such. I just keep on making new stories everyday. Because I have an odd and interesting life!

I don’t know that I have one of those. I prefer to hear stories than to tell them.

I have an almost 7 year old niece. I am asked to repeat this little story over and over and over..

I was 6 and it was Christmas Eve. I wanted to see Santa really bad, so, when my parents and sibs were asleep, I got up and snuck into the living room. Our sofa was right beside the Christmas tree. I was able to slide my skinny, little body under the sofa. I went under, and waited for the Big Guy. The next thing I knew, I was back in bed and it was morning. I told my niece that neither my parents nor my sister and brothers put me back in my bed. It must’ve been Santa. Her eyes light up like a Christmas tree every time I tell her that story.

^ best story EVAR

This one time, at band camp…

@jjmah – D’aaaawwww!

Probably the one where I got put on stage at a concert at age 4 or 5 and, during a bit of impromptu banter, called Eddie Kendricks a “dummy” for mistaking the apple on my dress for an orange. The lights made it look orange, obviously, but I didn’t take that into consideration at all, I just let fly with the name-calling.

The one about the time I accidentally unplugged the entire PA system for the Steve Morse band right in the middle of their concert. LMAO!!

Probably the story of how I delivered my first son without contractions after 2 hours of sheer will and determination because I was so against a c-section. And I think I often share my story of meeting my husband on wis.dm.

Ha!

I love to tell the story of the funniest thing I’ve ever seen in real life. On one vacation, my Dad and I were hanging out on a beach, enjoying a lazy day. My Dad started to say something, and I turned to look at him just as a pelican flew overhead. It decided that that moment was as good as any to go, and shit all over the side of my Dad’s face, and even a bit in his mouth. So, I turned just in time to see him begin furiously spitting, and then making a mad dash for the ocean to wash his face off. I fell out of my chair with laughter. I’ve never seen someone so simultaneously angry and embarrassed. Due to the pelican’s diet, my Dad has not eaten fish since that incident.

I end up telling the story of how I inadvertently met my boyfriend via craigslist rideshare quite often. I always expect a more skeptical response from people but most find it fascinating which makes me happy.

Otherwise, I’m really sick of telling people why I moved from Pittsburgh to Boulder and what I’m doing here. Because I really don’t have a reason other than “I wanted to.”...so they just stare at me always expecting more and I say “I’m sorry, that’s it.”

Probably why/how long I’ve been a vegetarian because I live in a community that is very meat-and-potatoes oriented and vegetarianism is not only uncommon but also seen as very liberal. So when people find out I do not eat meet they want to know the story behind that decision.

The CliffsNotes Version.

George Burns sang to me.

I frequently outline my career aspirations and how they’ve changed. In my first year of university, I was a Science student, aiming to go into Pharmacy. Now, in my fifth year, I’m finishing a degree in Film Studies with a minor in Philosophy or English, and I’ve recently enrolled in a professional dance training program. This usually leads to some good conversation. It’s interesting to hear how other people decided upon their careers.

Yes, I grew up in Vegas. No, I didn’t live in a hotel.

The one about the top hat and the hamburger ;) lol!

The time my cat got stuck in the dashboard of my car.

I normally try to find a way to work the story about how I was conceived during the San Francisco earthquake because my parents lost the cable into conversation.

My kid was in 3rd grade and wanted to walk to school instead of being driven. It was 4 blocks away and other kids would accompany him throughout his walk. We agreed that he would be driven to school that morning and he would walk home that afternoon.

That day, I bought a new car, and couldn’t resist the temptation to spy on him. I shaved my beard, put on a sock cap, complete with groucho marx glasses and mustache with big nose. No way would he recognize me!

School let out and he left with a group of friends. I started my car and began the pursuit. As they walked, friends would leave the group one by one, until finally, my son was alone for the last two blocks of his walk.

I screeched my brakes at the stop sign blocking his path in front of him on the sidewalk, kicked open the passenger door and said, “Get in kid! We’re taking a ride!”

He didn’t skip a beat, stayed calm, and for the first time ever I heard him curse. He shouted, “Look Asshole! My Mom said don’t take rides from strangers cause my Dad will kick your Ass!”... He was a third grader mind you.

He calmly walked around the front of the car, keeping his eyes on me the entire time. When he got to the other side, he paused and said, “Oh hey Dad! What are you doing here?”... The jig was up! He’d recognized me despite my clever disguise and new car.

I was at a loss for words actually. I said, “I’m spying on you of course! Hop in, let’s take a ride in the new car”. He frowned and replied, “No thanks, my Mom told me not to ride with strangers”. He gave me a grin, turned around, and walked the rest of the way by himself with his chin held high.

I met him back home 60 seconds later. He was so excited to have walked by himself, that he didn’t mention a word about my spying. Mom had cookies ready for the new self reliant young man, but after hearing the story, I didn’t get any.

@RealEyesRealizeRealLies Your kid is amazing! That would be a great scene in a very funny movie.

A stupid story from when I was in the 2nd grade. I was in the middle of the shallow end of a pool and I got a cramp in one of my toes and about “drowned”. My family thinks it’s the funniest story in the world. And I’m not sure what to think of the fact that just the thought of my near death experience (maybe I exaggerate a little) ignites hysterical fits of laughter any time my family gets together.

They’re all about my kids. The time I walked into the living room and saw “CORY” written on the wall in uneven three-year old scrawl. The kid couldn’t read yet, but she understood that those symbols were important to her for some reason. I hollered, Cory!!” She came scampering in. I said, “We don’t write on walls! We write on paper!”
Her big brown eyes widened in disbelief and amazement, and she said, “How did ju know it waz me?” :)

And the time she she was 4 and her little bro was 2, and she came upstairs tattling, “Mommy! Chris hit me back!”

And the time my son got stuck in a mailbox.

And the time the Easter bunny, for the life of her, could NOT find one of the eggs the kids hid….and I couldn’t very well ASK them where it was!

@wtfrickinfrack :) That’s what you get for swimming right after you eat!

The time my friends and I set fire to a golf ball and when the outer shell melted away, the ball of string or whatever it is made of, started unwinding and flying all around the floor of the abandoned, half-built building.

@RealEyesRealizeRealLies THAT is hilarious…..but all these yearsI thought you were a girl…....boy do I feel sheepish!

The CliffsNotes Version.
I am mentioned in a book.

The one about my brother Larry and the other one about my other brother Larry!!!!!

@ZEPHYRA Knee slapper. ~

The one where I accidentally met The Edge and Bono. Or the one where Robbie from Godsmack said I was “kick-ass drummer” and shook my hand when I was 15.

Or the one where ____ got _____ and ______ happened. (Insert any party story imaginable)

@ChazMaz Quit with the Cliff Notes! Tell us the story! What book?

OK @wundayatta

Your turn

The time I got a plastic Easter egg completely stuck in my mouth for over an hour.

Also, my whole family loves for my dad to talk about the time he saved my life in the ocean. We got stuck in a strong current, he threw me repeatedly and was cussing at me “Swim god d***it! SWIM! he finally threw me out of the current he swam out as well. Then I stomped up the beach to where my family was. My mohter asked why I was mad, my father had just saved my life! I said “Well he could have told me to swim in a nicer tone!” I was being a brat and I now realize how scared he was for me.

@jeffgoldblumsprivatefacilities Something very similar happened to my best friend. She hasn’t been the same since…

I usually tell the story about the time I flanked a squad of enemies and shot down all three of them.

…In paintball…

@ChaosCross

They died for your dye?

@Val123 – Ok.. Ok…

“Sh-Boom! The Explosion of Rock ‘n’ Roll (1953–1968)” – Clay Cole

Page 72

Hmm…I don’t think I really have anything specific. That would depend on the topic of conversation at the time. Nobody’s ever randomly asked me to tell something out of nowhere.

The Stories of The Worst Boss In The World.

I don’t have any specific story that I tell all the time, etc. I do love to tell fun stories about the various characters I encounter.

I’m a storyteller. I have lots, and folks often ask to hear ‘em again and again.

@Simone_De_Beauvoir You know…I don’t think I actually KNOW how you and JP met. You two together were just a part of wisdm from the time I came on board….

@Val123 well now you know!

All I know is that you guys met on wisdm. I’ve always known that, but I want the details! Like, I got to follow Kelly and FGS from the very beginning as their romance blossomed! And ‘Thena and Xray too.