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Your_Majesty's avatar

Will you fight 'fire' with 'fire'?

Asked by Your_Majesty (8212points) March 11th, 2010

If somehow you’re in a conflict(unavoidable conflict) with some people/someone. He/she start the fight first and he/she wants to light up the fire,what’s your best respond toward this person?. Will you fight back?,calm him/her down?,or will just ignore them?. Do you think one or two harsh word and insults will raise your temper and your will to fight?. Will you judge this person from his/her age,gender,background,relation,or else before you decide whether or not you want to fight back?. Do you realize the consequences from your action?.

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22 Answers

Ivy's avatar

Most conflict is avoidable if people can get past their egos.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

It depends on the situation – if I am at work, I will not fight fire with fire right then but I will get my stand later on in a much more hurtful fashion and using all the usual channels but they won’t know what hurt ‘em. Outside of work, on the train, sometimes I will fight fire with fire – sometimes, there is no other way and there is no time.

ucme's avatar

Better to extinguish flame before someone gets burnt.In my experience anyway.

tranquilsea's avatar

It really depends on who is doing the baiting.
Random person on the street = walk away.
Friend of friend? I would try to get to the bottom of the taunting and if I couldn’t I would avoid them?
Friends? I don’t have friends like this because I weed trouble makers out of my life. Life is harsh enough without drama makers. If a friend were to suddenly turn to this kind of behaviour I would try to get to the bottom of what was going on to make them act that way.

I agree that almost all “conflicts” are avoidable in the manner you’ve alluded to. But I guess that depends on whether you like drama (some people do).

wundayatta's avatar

If it’s worth it to you—because you like a fight, for example, then you don’t need to cool it down. You just have at it.

If you are concerned about hurting your opponent or if you are concerned about what others think, then you might seek to smooth things over with calming words.

If you have had enough and don’t really care what your opponent thinks, you just walk away. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve just walked away here. I say what I say, but I don’t always feel a need to defend it.

Fyrius's avatar

In some more seriousness: as a policy, if I believe someone has crossed a line I do intend to call them out on it. If only for the sake of clarity.

Your_Majesty's avatar

@All,thank you for responding!. Good point!
@Fyrius LOL on that. But it’s kinda cruel.

Cruiser's avatar

You never bring a knife to a gun fight…I bring rocket launchers! lol!

Fyrius's avatar

@Cruiser
I’ll keep in mind only ever to challenge you to gun fights in narrow windy corridors.

Barnaby's avatar

Fight fire with fire and you’ll burn your house down.

ubersiren's avatar

I know it doesn’t do any good, but I can’t help but get all lit up like a Christmas tree when someone hits that sweet spot. I usually try to be civil and understanding in a discussion, but if the other person in the conversation turns into an opponent, then I get all jacked up. There may be yo mama jokes.

marinelife's avatar

I don’t usually meet anger with anger.

wundayatta's avatar

When they say they fight fire with fire, it doesn’t mean it’s a conflagration just like the one they are fighting. It’s a carefully set fire that will be blown towards the main fire, creating an area without fuel that will stop the main fire. It can only work under special circumstances—when the wind has changed from the direction it was originally blowing in.

Arguments and anger aren’t like that. The analogy doesn’t really work.

What you are talking about is called the “tit for tat” strategy. You do to the other person what they are doing to you. It has been shown to be an effective strategy, but only when the other person will not back down unless you show them the same level of force they show.

definitive's avatar

Nope I don’t fight fire with fire…there’s better ways to deal with conflict. I’m a proud person and depending on what the issue is I’d rather walk away from the person than be confrontational…it sometimes has a bigger affect on winding them up.

Actions I find can speak even louder than words!!

Cruiser's avatar

@Fyrius That is what hand grenades are for! lol!

phillis's avatar

I am almost always content to make my point and be done with it. I don’t stick around and argue in circles, because I realize that I don’t actually need their validation. If someone is rude or hateful, I will sometimes return the favor in my own way, but vengefulness is counterproductive to my long-term goals.

filmfann's avatar

In my battle against the Worst Boss In the World, I knew he would lie, cheat, and steal to get me fired. I took the honest path.
At one point, I could have easily had him fired, if I told a small lie, and I passed.
I still won, though he still has a job with my company.

thriftymaid's avatar

I’m not a fighter in my personal life. Professionally, I often find it more satisfying to fight fire with water.

warka1's avatar

if your a star, yes fight fire with fire. depends how much fire power you have, take apporiate actions and interchange between water and fire until you acquire patience. if like fire, use fire to damp out the fire, if not replace something you like until it burn out.

JeffVader's avatar

I prefer to respond with a devastating inferno rather than mere fire. I’ve always believed that if someone fronts-up to you in this way you have to utterly destroy them so they never think about coming back for more.

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