General Question

windex's avatar

Need help selecting a weapon to protect self against home invasions.

Asked by windex (2932points) March 29th, 2010

Although I want world peace, and would never want to harm another living thing…and believe in the whole zen/if it’s my time, then I’ll lie down and let the tiger eat me…sort of belief.
buuuuuuut I have just a few more things to do before leaving this place, so I rather “defend” myself for now. (not that I care for a piece of paper/chedder)

Anyways, here is the question:

I think guns (although very reliable) are very dangerous (even if you know what you are doing and respect it) because it is much easier to “accidentally” shoot someone, vs. “accidentally” chop someone’s head off.

I was thinking of getting a samurai sword to keep in my room.

Any suggestions? (diff weapon, where to buy from, tips, tricks etc)
I was thinking about this the other day and the ONLY thing I have in my room that I can use Is my external hard drive (which is obviously not a weapon, trying to be funi /sarcastic I will stop talking now)

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37 Answers

judochop's avatar

Get a dog and love it.
Anything found in your home can be used as a weapon.

jrpowell's avatar

A golf club. I’m not joking. I keep a five iron next my bed. It is light and you can swing it fast and it will fuck you up if you are on the receiving end.

Lightlyseared's avatar

Decent locks and solid windows and doors.

TexasDude's avatar

Mossberg 500 pump shotgun.

12 gauge buckshot.

Be sure it has a solid stock and learn to shoot it. A weapon mounted flashlight helps too.

Alot of flutherites are convinced that guns are wicked things that will only hurt you, and someone breaking into your house will run in fear if you blow a rape whistle at them, or squirt them with a water gun, or offer them a hug. That is likely not the case. The first step to being able to readily defend yourself is to admit and accept that there are nasty people in the world who will hurt you if given the opportunity, and you have a choice: you can be prepared or not. There is nothing wrong with preparedness and it doesn’t make you paranoid or whatever.

That noted, get a shotgun and plenty of training. You likely will never have to use it, but it’s better to have it and not need it than need it and not have it, right?

Coloma's avatar

Yes, a dog is a good choice, most criminals do not want to be called attention to by even a barking dog, let alone one that seems aggressively minded. I agree with no firearms and the whole zen thing myself. I’ll just club ‘em with my marble Buddha stature next to my bed. lol

Another good thing is pure ammonia in a squirt bottle…blast someone in the face with ammonia and they’re going to be incapacitated long enough to make an escape.

Better yet…move to a safer place.

I live on 5 acres in the foothills, no one comes around here, one way in and one way out and all my neighbors do keep guns…I’m covered by a landslide. haha

jaytkay's avatar

If you can’t have a dog, then a very large dog bowl outside your door.

njnyjobs's avatar

An aluminum baseball bat. . . a taser stun gun . . . pepper spray…

However, deterence is preferred over defense. . . so, installing an alarm system with intruder protection and loud external speakers would prevent would-be home invaders from successfully carrying out their plan. Sometimes, the mere signage of Alarm Protection helps a premise from being targeted.

nebule's avatar

@windex me too!!! GQ!!!

I’d probably say some kind of spray thinking about it…. but wouldn’t know what was best….

Coloma's avatar


Ammonia in a windex bottle. lol

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@johnpowell A five iron, What do you use to fix your divots?

thriftymaid's avatar

baseball bat and mace

Kraigmo's avatar

Whatever weapon you choose, remember to practice the motions of using it at random moments every month. If you don’t go through the motions, you’ll be clumsy when it really is needed.

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

I have a Mossberg 12 gauge for that purpose but would like an M1 Garand just for effect ;)

ucme's avatar

I would utilise several depending on the severity of the risk.
The wife. (she can be mighty persuasive when the need arises)
The dog. (only a puppy at present but just you wait)
Baseball bat. (speaks for itself)
A big knife. (see above)
In that order I must stress.

rebbel's avatar

Another good ‘weapon’ is to make sure that your house is better secured then that of your neighbour(s).
Or a shotgun.

TexasDude's avatar

Here and here is some additional information that may be of use to you.

MissAnthrope's avatar

I second the golf club suggestion and echo what @johnpowell said. I keep at least one in the car, just in case. They’re light, fast and easy to swing, and I feel pretty confident that I could fuck somebody up with it if I needed to.

ragingloli's avatar

Type 3a Compression Phaser Rifle. Federation standard issue.

anartist's avatar

@judochop @njnyjobs @rebbel and others have the right idea.
The best defense is a well-guarded home

absalom's avatar

A katana, obviously.

cazzie's avatar

Oh. I just remembered something. One guy told me that a saw was a good thing to keep by your bed. If someone comes to your room, they’re not likely to grab it themselves, but you can grab it with both hands and swing it at them and they can’t take it off you and it’s a damn good deterrent because when it hits them it will tear and scratch and hurt like hell AND it keeps them at a distance.

OneMoreMinute's avatar

A can of Wasp Spray. It shoots several feet (20?-30?-40?) in a stream, and you aim for their face.

source: an email forward

Coloma's avatar


Ooooh…wasp spray….shit..I have sprayed myself on more than once occasion…evil stuff it is! lol

Bluefreedom's avatar

One of these would work well in keeping the homestead safe.

josie's avatar

You would have to be desperate to bring yourself to chop somebody up with a sword or to stick them with a knife. When I was in the service, I had no problem using a rifle, but I always prayed that I would never have to use a knife.
Golf club or a fireplace poker are good ideas, but you have to be closer than you would like.
Sprays are OK, but they will affect you as well as the subject if the breeze from the window is blowing your way. Big barking dog is good too, but you gotta love dogs to train and care for them properly.
I have a shotgun. Won’t penetrate the walls easily, don’t have to aim that well, big big noise, the business end looks very big and scary etc.

semblance's avatar

Not a sword. It is more difficult to use than a firearm. I do not agree with your position on firearms but you are entitled to your opinion there. So, if you are really against a firearm then I would go with those who suggest a baseball bat and a dog, if you can have a dog where you live. I favor a wooden bat over an aluminum one because it has more heft. A baseball bat is very similar to the weapon used to put hastily trained men at arms to work in medieval times, which was a mace. (No, not a spray, a stick with a big ugly spiked bal on the end of it.) They used that kind of weapon because it did not take a lot of training to learn how to use it fairly effectively. If you opt for the baseball bat, then go somewhere safe with it and learn how to swing it around and whack things with it. No weapon can be safely wielded without at least some practice.

forestGeek's avatar

I think a chainsaw would be a fine choice.

LuckyGuy's avatar

Good Pepper spray. It has decent range. Windex and other home remedies will only piss the guy off.
You are not dealing with a normal prerson. He most likely is armed, a hell of lot stronger than you, and has no moral code.

If you are going to fight you have to fight.
IMO you need to make it quick and lethal.

Bugabear's avatar

I’d go with bear or pepper spray, Taser and a Police ASP Baton. Perfect for any situation.

YARNLADY's avatar

A voice activated emergency phone designed to call for help as soon as you call out the “call code”.

Jeruba's avatar

@YARNLADY, have a specific product to recommend?

YARNLADY's avatar

@Jeruba No, I didn’t look it up, sorry

srtlhill's avatar

Mossberg spray not any type of liquid spray. If you still don’t want to kill use birdshot two rounds then pump in number three which starts with slugs.
One and two warnings to exit now three or more they hit the floor. No license needed just training for confidence and safety. Good luck

BoredAndConfused's avatar

Glock Akimbo w/ FMJ

Bugabear's avatar

@BoredAndConfused You need Bling Pro for that. Use a Spas-12 instead. Less nooby.

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