General Question

joscketSeper's avatar

How do people talk nonstop, when I pause and it takes me time to think?

Asked by joscketSeper (323points) April 2nd, 2010

I don’t get it. Most talkative people talk like “hefejfekjfekjekjfefkjefkejfekjfefkjefekjfekfjefekfje”

When i try to talk this is how i kind of talk
“fjkfd ...................fdfd…...................fdfd…....................fd”
In other words, i pause, it takes me time to think. It takes me times to find transitions. etc

Do those people who talk nonstop have better brain connections?

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22 Answers

Kismet's avatar

They are basically speaking their thoughts out loud while they are thinking them.
Where as you probably are trying to take time and make sure your words come out the way you want them to.

Some people don’t think BEFORE they speak.

I am guilty of this.

FutureMemory's avatar

I pause constantly when I talk. My mum does as well, and my grandfather. Just as Kismet said, it’s a habit we’ve formed in order to carefully choose what we say and how we say it. I think. What was the question?

Just_Justine's avatar

I am guilty as charged. I talk to much and too fast. They say it’s a salesman’s plight! I do sometimes slow down though loll.

Your_Majesty's avatar

It gives you the atmosphere of competition. Usually if you don’t feel you can catch up/argue with well motivated people you’ll be forced to develop your submission state and lose your courage to keep up with them. I think people who act like that usually high-determined in what they’re about to say. To handle this you must be more competitive and reject their comment on the same time.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

People are different – I am someone like you describe – it’s not that I don’t think before I speak, it’s that I can do both at the same time.

Trillian's avatar

My ex SO used to get angry with me for not answering him as soon as he finished speaking. I like to take the time to frame my thoughts and what I want to say. It works for me, I say fewer things that I have to take back and am better able to sound rational during an argument.
Don’t feel pressured. Take your time and only say what you want to say. You really can’t go wrong, and if people don’t want to take the time to listen to you, it’s their loss. You probably would have wasted your breath anyway.

Exhausted's avatar

I am what you describe. A non-stop talker. I have not thought about it before, but it is probably just like @Kismet said, I am speaking my thoughts as they come without stopping to choose which ones I should verbalize. I am an open book, what you see is what you get, there is no mystery to me. If I think it, I say it, so you never have to wonder if there are ulterior motives lurking in my mind. I really wish everyone was like that so you did not have to try and figure out what is really going on inside their heads, relationships would be much more simple if all people said what they thought and what they really meant.

CMaz's avatar

My ex, and one of the reasons she is was because of that.

She would Talk non stop. And when there was a pause, for you to inject something. She would start up and just talk over you.

I HATE people that do that shit. Conversation is about taking turns.

Disclaimer: The word hate was used for dramatic intent.

BoBo1946's avatar

when i was a young man, could understand why older people always “butted in” on the conversation, now i understand! Have to “spit out my thoughts,” or I’ll forget what I was going to say!

BoBo1946's avatar

@ChazMaz got’cha….certainly understand where you are coming from!!!!!!!!!

Trillian's avatar

I knew a girl who was like @ChazMaz‘s ex. I used to tell my then husband that I felt like I was nothing but a giant ear. I finally had to cut the association. I was going to say “end the friendship” but it was never that.

ZEPHYRA's avatar

I know a number of people who could talk the hind leg off a donkey, I don’t know how they do it and I guess their brain’s Rounds Per Minute are extremely fast!

FutureMemory's avatar

During my more bitter moments I call it having diarrhea of the mouth. No one has something that interesting to say that frequently. It’s like they just can’t stand silence so they fill the air with random noise. No thanks.

JLeslie's avatar

Regarding some of the other answers, there is a difference in being very talkative and not letting someone get a word in edgewise, and being able to speak quickly when it is your “turn.” But, a lot of times the two do go hand in hand, fast talkers and people who monopolize a conversation.

Somewhere in the middle is probably best. Sometimes I interrupt people or finish their sentences because they are talking too slow, which I know can be rude. People who are very talkative like me typically do not get offended when interrupted, because they can pull the conversation back to their point, or will follow the other person down their tangent when interrupted and circle back. I also will fight, really ask is a more appropriate word, to finish my point if I feel it is necessary, by asking the person interrupting to wait a second and let me finish my thought; typically I only feel the need to do this during serious conversations.

I think some of it is cultural, or what we are accustomed to. North Easterners tend to talk fast, other parts of the country slower, but there is no specific rule about it really, I find fast talkers and slow talkers everywhere.

I do think fast talkers possibly think faster, possibilities of where the conversation is going are in their heads as the other person is talking. I think maybe though fast talkers are not as good at really listening to the other person during a conversation, but are good at getting their own thoughts out.

@joscketSeper I’m curious, is it difficult for you to follow a fast talker?

YARNLADY's avatar

I realized some time ago that the reason I am that stereotypical ‘motor-mouth’ is because I have a compulsion to talk non-stop. I have self-diagnosed it as a symptom of OCD. As a result, I have done extensive research online, and found several helpful ideas and tips.

shpadoinkle_sue's avatar

I think it has to do with the timing of synapses firing. When I think of what I’m about to say, I look away. One of my friends can just look me dead in the eye and just go “blahblahblahblahblahblah”. It’s the speed of the brain, I think. People are different.

JLeslie's avatar

@YARNLADY Yeah, but, the OP is saying they cannot even come up with the words. I don’t see how it can be just about compulsion? Or, do you just talk nonsense? Somehow I doubt that.

YARNLADY's avatar

@JLeslie My head is full of ideas and thoughts and I never run out of things to say about every subject you can imagine. My husband, on the other hand, has to translate everything in his head from whatever his personal language is to human speech. He takes forever to answer, because he stops to form all the words first, then he speaks in complete sentences.

JLeslie's avatar

@YARNLADY I’m more like you. Do you think any of it has to do with intelligence?

YARNLADY's avatar

@JLeslie No, I doubt it. If it’s caused by aphasia as a neurological disorder it cuts across all levels of intelligence.

In my hubby’s case it probably is. His intelligence is so much higher than the rest of us, his mind works differently.

JLeslie's avatar

@YARNLADY I kind of doubt it is intelligence also. But, it does have to do with how our brains fire all at once I think. When a subject is brought up I think a PET scan would show many parts of our brains working, while other people are more focused maybe. I do think some of it is learned. My whole family is very talkative, men and women.

Beltanescat's avatar

Oh my God…Non stop talkers…the reason I personally despise the phone. No one is as thrilled as what they have to say more than THEY are. The biggest trip is to watch them when you are speaking…they are already formulating what they wish to convey to you or someone, and hardly wait for you to finish before they have taken in a HUGE gulp of air so they can mindlessly chatter about NOTHING for another long term.
I could complain about this…forever…but would rather just hide from them!!!!!

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