Would you pretend for the sake of your family?

Hypothetical A: You were abused by an older family member as a child, and the abuse was kept a secret. Now you are an adult and your abuser has Alzheimer’s and cannot remember you, or the abuse he inflicted. The responsibility of caring for this person has fallen to your immediate family, from whom you have been hiding the truth for years, and they need you to help them take care of him. Do you remain silent about the abuse and help your family out in taking care of this person?

Not entirely Hypothetical B: You are in a relationship with someone who you know was sexually abused by a parent as a child. It’s been many years since the abuse occurred and now your SO has a somewhat normal relationship with that parent. Your SO wants you to be a part of his/her family’s life. Do you go to family functions, dinners, and outings with him/her where this parent is present, and pretend that it’s no big deal? Can you “forget” what you know about this person for a few hours so your SO can have a good time with his/her family?

Note: I created this profile specifically to ask this question. I am a known member on fluther.