What does it mean when a heterosexual is always flirting with a bisexual? And they know you're a bisexual?

She is manipulating you to get attention for herself. She is married (unhappily or not) so unless you’re in love with this person and she’s in love with you, stay away from the situation.

i do of course! but its more to it! she is in the military, and so is her husband they was never in love just friends! I never was close to her until she knew about my sexuality

She might be looking to “try something new” but whatever the reason, it’s bad news.

okay how do I stay away from her! This means I will have to cut my friends off that Ive known 17yrs plus…I mean she gets an atittude when Im closer to them than her(she’s their sister)

It means they know you’re bi and want a shot with you, bi means you’re open to both female and male? Talk to her gently and say you’re uncomfortable with the level of her flirting. Tell her honestly you’re not interested in a tryst with a married.

true but she is very hard to talk to she tries very hard

by the way its been almost a year with the flirting

All the more reason to have “The Talk”. If the friendship is worth preserving, you’ve got to step up and take you both past this fixation she’s formed on you.

i’m a lesbian and have encountered this many times before. often times, when you come out to someone who is questioning their sexual orientation, they’ll latch onto you. not just because you’re out but probably because they’re attracted to you. if she has questioned her orientation, she’s possibly looking for a way to express that further. that she’s married and that you’re not interested are two big problems though.

some women are just really flirty though, so it’s good that you’ve identified it going over the boundary of what’s comfortable for you.

in this case, because it’s gone on for so long, I would say to be direct with her and say something to the effect of, “I know that I could be wrong with this, but because you’re my friend I wanted to bring it up. I’ve been feeling like there’s more than just friendship happening here and that’s making me feel uncomfortable. I wanted to address it because I want to continue our friendship but I need to know that this elephant in the room (or at least what feels like it) was dealt with. I want to stay friends and want to keep our friendship at a platonic level, but was wondering what your thoughts were on this subject.”

…could be awkward, might not be though. Always worth asking about. In the long run, it’ll save a lot of grief and possibly the friendship :)

If the emotions are running strong: She feels trapped and sees you as a way out. Shes confused, because she likes how free you make her feel (compared to how trapped her marriage makes her feel) and shes considering things she wouldnt normally consider, so long as it means an escape from the unhappiness she is currently in.

If it’s not so emotional: she just wants to try something new and then move on.

What she really needs is not to be in a marriage that makes her unhappy. Maybe that marriage could make her happy but she favors escapism, and she’s throwing away just as good of an opportunity as anything else? Maybe the guy’s not right for her? Maybe she just needs to feel safe? Who knows?

I agree with @ortizjuno….just be up front with your concerns.

There is nothing more mind-numbing and lonely than an empty marriage. I think she is confused and just grasping at straws——and in need of connection and intimacy. I am not saying that you should provide it, but you should point out how you feel about the whole (messy) situation and that you aren’t willing to tank your friendship for a fling…but that you are there for here, platonically. If you end up feeling something more for her…wait until she has sorted herself out. That will spare you a lot of pain.

Steer clear of anything more than friendship…until she decides what to do with her life. She has to make some heavy decisions.

[mod says] Minor typos in title have been corrected via internal edit.

@augustlan
There’s internal edit? Awesome!

SuperMod to the rescue!

Flirting is sexy fun. Many people do it just for fun. Often it is inappropriate ( as in married) but it crosses sexual lines because no one usually flirts with someone they do not like.
I would stay away from a married person sexually but your bi-ness allows you to consider taking that horrible leap into being a member of an emotional unstable triangle.