General Question

ConfusedKid's avatar

How do you conquer the awkwardness of the 'first time'?

Asked by ConfusedKid (153points) May 7th, 2010

Ok, so the question might be a little obvious to this description.
Right, im 15. Boy. And currently going to high school.
I was just wondering about having sex for the first time then I thought how awkward it would be when you and your girlfriend sit down on a bed and intend on doing it. Who makes the first move? Guy im guessing but HOW and WHERE?
Im not exactly planning on doing this in the near future – just wondered and itll probably help me in the future ;-)

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29 Answers

MissA's avatar

This may sound corny, but there is ONLY ONE first time. Make it special…something to remember for the rest of your life. Don’t do it because you want to get that first time over with. Someone else will fill you in on all the usual cautionary things. But, you’re 15 and don’t have the benefit of years to back what I’m saying…make it special, Sweetheart. I’m so serious here.

marinelife's avatar

Thing just progress naturally. You start by kissing. Then you explore each other’s bodies (a process you should take slowly to enjoy the pleasure that it gives). When your girlfriend is ready (she will take longer than you will), stop an put on your condom. Then proceed.

ConfusedKid's avatar

Thanks alot, made me smile and im now ALOT less worried. Even though I shouldnt at the moment ahaha.

@marinelife, thanks. Made it sound ‘natural’. Apart from the condom part haha. Which obviously would have to ‘go down’ ;) Lol

Response moderated
ConfusedKid's avatar

@Fyrius I dont know what you mean

Dr_Lawrence's avatar

If you are smart, you will make sure your first time is with someone you trust and really care about. If you don’t have someone you feel that way about, don’t give in to the social pressure to “do it” so you can claim it as some accomplishment.

No matter what, put a condom on before you get started. Ask her to help if you want. It makes it less awkward!

ConfusedKid's avatar

I would NEVER do it with someone I didnt know or wasn’t close to for the first time. Thats stupid & I dont give in to pressure.
Wouldnt it sound kinda ‘creepy’ though…
“Wanna help me put on a condom?” Just wondering aha

Fyrius's avatar

Me neither. :D

Well, I was thinking the awkwardness of the first time would wear off after the first time, so just figuring it out as you go sounds like a fine approach. Which, on second thought, is not very helpful, and probably about to get modded.
I really shouldn’t reply to questions about sex until I have anything more intelligent to say about it.

ConfusedKid's avatar

@Fyrius, guess I see what your saying – but who wants to risk to mess it up the first time, would it leave room for a ‘second time’? Aha

janbb's avatar

It really is much better if you don’t think of having intercourse right away. When you are in a relationship, things often progress very naturally over time from kissing and “making out” to further exploration and then possibly intercourse. By then, you know each other and your physical and emotional reactions much better and the “first time” is much more likely to be natural and lovely.

Dr_Lawrence's avatar

@janbb is a wise and sensitive woman. You would be wise to give her advice some serious consideration, @ConfusedKid

ConfusedKid's avatar

Even though I never intended to jump straight into intercourse (Haha, sounds like a euphamism or innuendo).
I never thought of things that way, and your completely right!

MissAnthrope's avatar

@janbb took the words right out of my mouth.

janbb's avatar

Oh – I can’t tell how nice and easy it gets once you are in that great relationship with a great girl. It’s really not awkward at all when you take your time.

ConfusedKid's avatar

:) thanks alot

MacBean's avatar

Don’t make a huge effort to avoid awkwardness. Just be as confident as you can, and be prepared to laugh at the awkwardness. That makes it even more fun. :D

eden2eve's avatar

If you choose this to take place with someone you know well, and you are already emotionally intimate, it’s unlikely that there will be much awkwardness. You will probably have been close physically in other ways before this happens, and I hope you will have very special feelings for one another. You will be very glad in the long term if you are very sure that this is what you want to do, and it is not a decision you make in “heat” or, as others have said, under any pressure. The only good reason to do this is because you want to express love to your girl, and you are both ready physically and emotionally for the change this will make in your relationship.

evandad's avatar

You don’t. Stop worrying or you’ll make it even more awkward when the time comes.

Nullo's avatar

@Dr_Lawrence Kid might also wait until he’s properly married. By then, trust and closeness issues ought to have worked themselves out.

RomeoandJuliet's avatar

Good things come to those who wait.

ducky_dnl's avatar

You’re 15! You shouldn’t even be worried about having sex. In my opinion that is way too young. (that is all I have to say) :/

antimatter's avatar

15, do you have pubic hair? Why do you worry about sex at such an early age? Get a spine and don’t let group pressure let you do something you will regret later. You don’t need to f^&%k in order to be cool or to fit into a group. If your chick or friends don’t understand that, then dump them!


I think 15 is a little too young to be having sex. I know you have urges, but 15 years-old is really too young to understand the consequences and risks of sex. I agree with @antimatter. You are still a boy——enjoy “boy-dom” while it lasts. Sex and “getting it on” can wait until you’re older and more mature. If you can’t wait, be sure to use your head wisely, and use contraception. You may not like the idea of using birth control, but I speak from personal experience, use it. Accidents can and do happen! ;)

ConfusedKid's avatar

I see all the comments about me being to young and I agree nut if you actually read the description. I say that I was just wondering. I’m NOT planning on doing it now nor do I want to really, id rather wait – the question just sprung to mind

ConfusedKid's avatar

“nut”, I meant But

janbb's avatar

@ConfusedKid That was the way I interpreted your question.

ConfusedKid's avatar

Yeah I know you did. But others didnt.


@ConfusedKid Well, I’m glad you asked anyways. It shows you are conscientious about sex and girls, and that you are taking responsibility for any lovemaking in the future. Good for you. ;)

ConfusedKid's avatar

@MRSHINYSHOES, thanks :) but isn’t everyone my age ;) haha.

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