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ucme's avatar

You see a bear in the wild, it's spotted you, the creature postures aggressively, what to do?

Asked by ucme (50031points) May 14th, 2010

A Remain calm stand perfectly still under no circumstances should you run.

B Scream like a 5yr old girl whose just lost her Barbie

C Sing the Bear Necessities in your bestest baritone hoping to woo & charm the animal into passive submission.

Or none of the above, insert alternative options.Be as funny or indeed succinct as you like.

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29 Answers

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

I will take off the pork chop necklace I usually wear on strolls in the woods,and hand it to him with a smile :)

deni's avatar

i think my instinct would be to run, even if i knew it was stupid. i would be too terrified to just stand there and let it roar at me. oh man. i hope this never happens.

ucme's avatar

@lucillelucillelucille Better & more practical than say a pearl necklace.

Blackberry's avatar

I would never be in the woods anyways unless someone brought me hunting. So I would have a gun and shoot the bear in the face! That gun would be an M-16 switched to automatic as well lol.

ucme's avatar

@deni I’d have to agree,well i’d do a combination of both running & B truth be told. God i’m such a hero type.

jfos's avatar

After watching Grizzly Man, I would remain calm and try to hold my ground. If the bear got too close, I would try to puff myself up and bark at it. If this worked, I would wait about ten or fifteen minutes until I left.

I would rather die fighting than die running. Also, it would get excited and more determined after chasing me down. It might let me off the hook with one or two swings if I stick around.

Berserker's avatar

If I have food on me I’ll throw it at the bear, to divert his attention away from me. I heard making loud noises and flailing about in an attempt to frighten the bear works too, but I figure if you frighten it too much, it might attack you.

So what would I do?

Die, most likely.

Aster's avatar

run backwards, screaming my head off while shooting my gun. When it caught up to me I’d punch it in the NOSE as hard as possible.
I’ll never go in the woods again. Thanks a lot .

ucme's avatar

@Aster Aww never mind, they might be just having their picnic after all.

bob_'s avatar

Four simple words: run like a bitch.

Aster's avatar

@bob_ lol !!! THIS would be when I would be wishing I had taken tree climbing lessons.

tranquilsea's avatar

I hike in bear country and it is good to know what type of bears are there and have a strategy for each. The most important thing is to make lots of noise when you walk. Most bear attacks happen when you get inadvertently between a mama bear and her cubs. If you are confronted by a grizzly bear don’t run hit it with a shot of the bear spray you should be carrying. If the bear charges you, drop on the ground in foetal position with your hands around the back of your neck and play dead. If the bear attacks, it’ll most likely only give you a swipe or two. Keep playing dead until the bear is long gone.

If you run into a black bear hold your ground, spray it, and if it attacks fight back with what ever you have.

Never run. Bears will think you are prey and run you down.

Black bears kill more people than grizzlies do.

BUT it is important to know that bears will do all they can to stay away from us. Be aware of your surrounding when you’re in their territory.

tranquilsea's avatar

never climb a tree, especially with a black bear, because they can climb faster than you can.

tranquilsea's avatar

And it is also important to know how few people are even attacked by bears compared to the thousands and thousands who regularly venture into their territory. We are a much bigger threat to them then they ever could be to us.

RedPowerLady's avatar

@tranquilsea great information!

My answer to the question: What s/he said ^^

susanc's avatar

I don’t know but I’ve been told that since bears’ back legs are longer than their front legs, they trip and roll when they try to run downhill, and they’d rather not try it. So I’d do that. I’d first have arranged things so that I only run into a bear on a steep slope with a getaway care idling at the bottom of it.

tranquilsea's avatar

Thanks @RedPowerLady . I’m a she btw :-P

I’m never completely comfortable when I’m out in the mountains and, really, you shouldn’t be. The closest I’ve ever been to a grizzly was when one sniffed all around our tent on a kayaking trip down the Columbia River through the Canadian Rockies. My heart was in my throat, but he just sniffed around and then moved on.

I’ve seen tens of people all gathered around foraging black bears on my drives through British Columbia, some people getting stupidly close to them trying to get close-up pictures. But the bears have always ignored them.

perspicacious's avatar

Go invisible. If that doesn’t work, faint.

jazmina88's avatar

I think I would KISS my behind goodbye.

I dont know where to get bear spray :(

RedPowerLady's avatar

@tranquilsea Wow, I don’t know how I’d stay calm in that scenario.
And where do you get bear spray? I live in Oregon. Might be nice to have for our hiking trips.

tranquilsea's avatar

@jazmina88 & @RedPowerLady I’m not sure where you get it in the States, but here in Canada you can pick it up at pretty much any outdoor shop. I get mine at MEC . As you see, the spray is made in the US.

As in most things, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. Don’t hike alone, makes lots of noise and educate yourself on the signs that a bear leaves. If you hike in somewhere there are a lot of fresh bear signs, turn around and hike out and find another trail.

Silhouette's avatar

Assume the position and kiss mine arse good bye. I would like to tell you I’d handle it with calm, but I’d be lying. I’d freeze, pee my pants and then panic and run.

ucme's avatar

@Silhouette That’s an endearing mental image,it really is.Same here by the way.

Aster's avatar

@Silhouette LOL !!! hahahaa

Aster's avatar

@Silhouette Laughing so hard I have tears in my eyes!

dillin257's avatar

I would agree with tranquilsea, living close to grizzlies and black bear we see them regularly. It is a privilege to see them in the wild, and they deserve our respect. The stupid people on the highway, are really annoying, they could jeopardize the bear’s future.
I find that bears may charge, but if you hold your ground, look big and yell, they are likely to bock, or do a false charge. If you are fishing, and bears join you, hunker down (non-threatening) they will be interested in the fish. Never make eye contact, and always give them a way out.
It you’re in bear country, you have to know what to do. Have bear spray, (short blasts) watch for signs, scat, over turned logs. Like traquilsea said play dead cover your head, if attacked by a grizzly. Fight a black bear, and cougars. If I was with someone that ran, well my problem would be over, I guess.

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