General Question

SamIAm's avatar

What's the appropriate Facebook etiquette in this situation?

Asked by SamIAm (8703points) June 9th, 2010

After a break up, how long do you wait to change your relationship status?

Does it differ depending on the relationship – example: a marriage vs a 2 year relationship vs engagement??

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19 Answers

mirifique's avatar

I’d change it within a week.

Lightlyseared's avatar

The same day. Also unfriend them as well.

robmandu's avatar

Me? I’d try to find out if anyone at Facebook had predicted the breakup in advance.

MrItty's avatar

I changed the status that same day. It served as a good way to notify my friends without having to answer “So how was your weekend” 20 or 30 times.

bob_'s avatar

The same day. Why wait? I wouldn’t unfriend my ex, though.

theichibun's avatar

As soon as you can get to a computer. Make it a race to see who gets it changed first.

nikipedia's avatar

@robmandu: That is fucking weird.

perspicacious's avatar

If you break up, the relationship has changed, go ahead and change it on FB. FB etiquette—that’s funny.

casheroo's avatar

@robmandu Creepy

I totally got mad at my husband and unmarried him on Facebook that’ll show him for not doing the dishes!

I think it would depend. I guess if we divorced, obviously there are major issues. If any form of cheating/lying was involved, I’d want to cut him out of my life..but we have children. So, I’d do it right away on Facebook, but probably keep him as a friend.

robmandu's avatar

Related question:

Let’s say you’re acquainted with a couple on FB. And you know they broke up a week ago… but not really any of the details.

What would you think if you viewed both their profiles and saw that one still showed as being in a relationship and the other not. Would you make assumptions as to who broke up with whom? Would you wonder if one wanted to get back together or was otherwise needy?

In the absence of solid information, do you think casual acquaintances would jump to conclusions you might not find favorable? Would you even care?

MrItty's avatar

@robmandu No, I would not “make assumptions as to who broke up with whom”. I would make assumptions as to who is more obsessed with Facebook.

tranquilsea's avatar

In a marriage I liken this to how long someone wears a wedding ring for after a breakup. Although, to me, Facebook is way, way down the list on things that are symbolically important. I’d wait to change my status as the last thing I would want would be suggestive messages post breakup.

Tobotron's avatar

unfriend Facebook ;) that will be the joker in the pack :)

Sarcasm's avatar

Why wouldn’t anybody do it instantly? I can’t see any reason to leave that up after breaking up. Are you afraid of shocking your friends or something?

I definitely remember changing mine that same day (although, at the time we used Myspace, not Facebook). After going out for ice cream. We didn’t de-friend each other though.

SamIAm's avatar

@Sarcasm : it’s become such an important means of communication (for example, i don’t e-mail people things, i normally facebook inbox them… especially my ex, whether its an event i want to go to or a new restaurant, i inbox the link or post it on his wall) that i think it hits hard even though it seems silly… especially if it isn’t a mutual break up.

kerplunk226's avatar

If you are definitely 100% broken up, I’d say change it as soon as you feel comfortable. I don’t even have a relationship status on mine because I’d rather have people stay out of it!

prescottman2008's avatar

if it’s confusing for you just start by saying “It’s complicated” for a week or two, then change it to “single”

Jeremycw1's avatar

I’d do it the next time I got on facebook. Thats what I’ve done in the past

Rarebear's avatar

This is one of the reasons I have no personal information whatsoever on my facebook account, except for my name.

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