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missjena's avatar

How long were you dating your significant other when you knew you loved them?

Asked by missjena (918points) June 30th, 2010 from iPhone
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25 Answers

YARNLADY's avatar

We met on Memorial Day, I moved in with him on the Fourth of July, and we married on Labor Day.

Pandora's avatar

We met on halloween, it was a hate, like situation and then we spoke on the phone 3 days later and everyday till our first date 12 days later. By then I knew I was feeling something but it wasn’t till I knew later that night that what I felt was love and not infatuation.
So basically, I knew I loved him on our first date and he said he knew before that.


About one week.

stranger_in_a_strange_land's avatar

I knew about three months before we actually started dating.

Pied_Pfeffer's avatar

I knew it had great potential after a week and was sure of it within a month. And that took place before we even met.

missjena's avatar

@ pied- I’m lost. How’d you love her before you met her?

partyparty's avatar

I knew him as a friend for about six months, and when we started a relationship I would say it was about six months before I knew he was the one for me.

Pied_Pfeffer's avatar

@missjena lol, sorry. We met online in a chat room, and it was purely by accident. After a couple of weeks, we exchanged e-mail addresses and wrote to each other twice a day. As a birthday gift, he sent a link to a video he made and posted on YouTube. Between the writing and the video, I knew he was The One. We then moved on to web-camming and met in person 6 months after the initial connection. Here’s a link to the video that sealed the deal.

P.S. I am female and he is male.

Cruiser's avatar

Had an inkling from the get go. The first time we dated it was pretty obvious there was something there that surprised us both. After that…..

PandoraBoxx's avatar

@Pied_Pfeffer aaaawwww. That would seal the deal for me, too!

janbb's avatar

37 years and the jury is still out! (That was said somewhat tongue-in-cheek.)

kirkratliff's avatar

It usually takes me a little longer to realize my feelings. Sometimes I get caught up in the aspects of dating and the excitement of it and then after about a month or two I realize my feelings. Although in some cases when it started out as casual dating did it take longer. It’s all about the pace and closeness you’ve developed with that person.

OpryLeigh's avatar

It took me about two months for me to know that I loved him and I was pretty up front about my feelings. It took him four years to tell me he loved me but I don’t know when he actually started to feel it.

SuperMouse's avatar

I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him about three days in.

wundayatta's avatar

three weeks, I think

Marva's avatar

I raise this for discussion:
I was married until about a year ago, 4 years, I felt I loved him as soon as a week from first date, actually felt this way with all of my relationships. Due to divorce, which was a consequence of not living him anymore in the same way, due to hardship in living and getting along together, I asked myself a few times if there is a love that is “more real”, that long lasting one, that I just have not experienced yet.
Recently, I am begining to think that we are love and finding a mate is to find someone we feel we can transfer this love to, with “topping” of sexual attraction.
If you agree with me, I believe the meaning of it is that we can love someone from the first minuete, though it still doesn’t mean we are ready to commit, or that we can “match” together

josie's avatar

I knew it before we dated. Love at first sight. I had to convince her to take interest in me.

Iclamae's avatar

He said it around 1 month in. It took me a bit longer…I’m not positive but I think around 2–3 month mark? I just remember being very self protective and being slow with the relationship on the whole.

le_inferno's avatar

Wow, Flutherites seem a bit hasty with the love… how can you possibly fall in love with someone within hours, a few days, a week? You can’t fully know a person that quickly. I take love very seriously. I do not believe in fancying myself in love, or telling someone I love him, unless I’m absolutely certain. Being absolutely certain includes fully understanding his character, sharing life experiences together, proving that he is worthy of my love, making it through trials together, not being able to visualize myself with anyone else, knowing I want to spend my life with him. I’m sorry, this just can’t happen in a matter of days.

I’ve made mistakes in the past, and I’ve learned that love isn’t created on a whim. You might fall for someone fast and hard, but the rush can wear off. Real, strong, enduring love is the kind that is built and worked for, rather than just a sudden flood of emotion for a person you scarcely know. Real life isn’t like Disney movies.

wundayatta's avatar

You might think that, @le_inferno. It sounds very reasonable and sober. However, it seems to me that you can know those things you want to know in a short period of time. It all depends on how much your trust your own judgement of character.

Absolute certainty is also an awfully high standard. In fact, I don’t think it’s possible to reach such a standard.

stranger_in_a_strange_land's avatar

@le_inferno It really wasn’t as fast as I described. Over a 2½ year period, I went from bodyguard to friend to lover. We were married 5 years after first meeting.

SuperMouse's avatar

@le_inferno I was married for over 20 years so I do have a bit of experience with relationships. I can tell you that with my man it was love at first sight – for both of us. I knew this was the man I had been waiting for. I also knew I would spend the rest of my life with him within a couple of weeks. Let me be perfectly clear, it has not been like a Disney movie, it has been a challenge. We have had many ups and downs and faced lots and lots of challenges, but we both knew we were where we needed to be and were committed to being together forever.

It is not hard for me to believe that someone who has not had the experience cannot relate to the possibility that there is such a thing as just knowing. Aside from the fact that i have always known this guy was out there and exactly how I would recognize him, I probably would have had a hard time believing it myself before it happened to me.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

I suppose it took a couple of months…but I knew I needed to be with him after about a week of talking online.

Dr_Lawrence's avatar

We never dated. My experience was like @Simone_De_Beauvoir.‘s I knew after a few long chats we belonged together and that the relationship would be like nothing I had ever know before. I was in love with her before I ever saw a picture of her. When we first met in person it was so natural to hold her and that first night was like the fulfilment of my lifelong search for my other half. I feel this way seven years later everyday.

augustlan's avatar

I’ve been in love three times in my life. The first two were slow buildups, as @le_inferno advocates, and I married the second one about a year after we met. We divorced 17 years later. After my divorce, I swore I’d never marry again, or even have a serious relationship. Huh. Life had other plans in store!

The third time I fell in love, I felt something extraordinary was unfolding on our first date. It was meant to be a bit of fun, a way to celebrate being single again. I was in no way looking for anything serious, let alone love. But, after the fun… we were sitting in the dark talking. Just… talking, and it hit me like a ton of bricks. I tried to deny it, so I didn’t acknowledge it for a little while, but it was definitely love. One like I’ve never known before. We’ve been married for almost 5 years now, and I still feel the same way.

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