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Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

Which way of death would you choose if you had to?

Asked by Hypocrisy_Central (26798points) July 6th, 2010

You are approached by a man dressed all in black, bald with dark shades. He tells you that in 14 days death will find you, but you have the choice of how you go. On the 14th day you have the choice to be at 6 locations, 2 of the locations if you are there you will be crushed to death by an object 400lb or heavier; the next 2 locations your death will come by being burned to death, and the last 2 locations your death will come by suffocation. He also gives you one last option, you can bypass all 6 locations but the death that was to befall you will pass to a loved one, a SO, child, sibling, parent or grand parent but you won’t know which. Would you go to any of the locations and if so which? Would you just stay home and let it pass to another family member. Would you thwart the plan and do yourself in before the 14th day?

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34 Answers

ragingloli's avatar

Suffocation please.

Dr_Lawrence's avatar

What an incredibly dark scenario! Getting crushed to death is not likely to be fast or painless, but slightly better than the other options. If I were absolutely convinced this was all true, I would opt for a death of my own choosing in the time and place and by the method I would choose.

Seaofclouds's avatar

My first question is would any of the locations be with my husband. I’d hate to die without getting to say goodbye to him in person. Second, if I were to do it myself before the 14th day, would that get rid of it passing to someone else or would it still pass since I didn’t take one of his 6 options of death?

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

@Seaofclouds The “pass” would be killed off as the mode of how you went would too.

@Dr_Lawrence Nothing says you can’t have them close by or with you but do you really want them to see you roasted like an almond or smashed like a bug?

shego's avatar

I would go with crushed to death, but it has to be a lot heavier than 400lbs.

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

@shego if 400lb hit you in the head 1st you’d have to be the luckiest person on the planet to sirvive that. :-)

shego's avatar

I would rather have something heavy as hell fall on me, and crush me like a pancake, so there is no chance of me suffering. I don’t handle pain very well, so…....

lillycoyote's avatar

;I don’t have children and am, let’s just say “between SOs;” and though I am only middle-aged-ish, sadly, the people I love the most have predeceased me… so I am going to opt for one of the suffocation options. I hear that it’s not really all that bad a way to go, considering the options that your question gives me.

Nullo's avatar

Depends on what we mean by suffocation. Painless, if not necessarily quick-and-painless, is my preference. Ideally, my cause of induced death would be so quick that I’d be dead before I realized it.

Thammuz's avatar

I’d have wild sex for 13 days then throw myself off a building.

LuckyGuy's avatar

I’d agree to crushing. On the 13th day I get 20 of my armed friends to stake out and stay at the sites and wait for the low-life to arrive. He’d have 120 bullet holes in him in 5 seconds.
Hey @Hypocrisy_Central. I’m worried about you, son.

talljasperman's avatar

I’d capture the guy and call the cops on him….

CaptainHarley's avatar

I’d call the little men in the white coats and have the guy in black taken to a psychiatric hospital! : )

knitfroggy's avatar

I’d choose the quickest manner of death and go with the crushing.

jfos's avatar

I think I would kill myself on/before the 14th day. In the words of Dostoevsky’s Kirillov:

“If God exists, all is His will and from His will I cannot escape. If not, it’s all my will and I am bound to show self-will.”

Jude's avatar


bunnygrl's avatar

I came close to death once from an asthma attack and while it is terrifying when it starts, the longer it goes on, the less you struggle and then start to “close down”. My Dr told me later when I was talking to him about it that the sensation I described was most likely due to the brain being starved of oxygen. Because I have always had troubles with my breathing, I have always known that I will some day die in that way. So, whilst if it was my choice, I would die in my sleep with my husband’s arms round me, if I had to choose from the above, it would be suffocation. In the time I had left I’d plan my own funeral to make sure hubby didn’t have the pain of doing it, and then I’d spend the rest of the time left making sure that my hubby knew how much I love him.
hugs all xx

tranquilsea's avatar

I would prefer to be crushed to death.

We play this “game” often in my family. Me: would you rather be shot or stabbed? Burn to death or freeze to death? Crushed or drowned?

CMaz's avatar

Off the family member.

Someone has to alert the world of this person.

drClaw's avatar

I would be less concerned with which place I would end up at and spend more time raising as much hell as I possibly could. Sex with my wife 5 times a day and boxing, biking, swimming or BBQing in between.

Also can the family member be an in-law? * dah-duh-clang *

I’m here all week, don’t forget to tip your waitress.

anartist's avatar

Cyanide pie-in-the-face!

TexasDude's avatar

I’d rather die in a complex plot twist.

majorrich's avatar

Getting hit by a 400 pound anvil sounds a bit Wile-e-Coyote, but probably the best way to go.

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

@worriedguy They are coming to take me away, ha ha, they are coming to take me a way, ho ho, he he ha ha to the funny farm where life is beautiful all the time, and I love to see those nice young men in their clean white coats. They are coming to take me away…….. ” Hey @Hypocrisy_Central. I’m worried about you, son.” I may like manic depressants and paranoid schizophrenics but I don’t think I have too much in common with them.

@talljasperman @CaptainHarley @worriedguy If the guy had a way to direct the action or fate metaphysically and not have to be where he said your end would be how would you stop him or take him to task?

@tranquilsea ”We play this “game” often in my family. Me: would you rather be shot or stabbed? Burn to death or freeze to death? Crushed or drowned?” Stabbed not a chance, I am sure that will be quite painful and if it was other than the heart I am sure you would suffer before you bled out. Getting popped in the head you most likely will be gone before you knew it, thus no pain. Burning is about as bad as freezing only with freezing chances are it will last way longer than burning even if the pain is not as intense. Drowning I don’t care for since I have this thing of water, not so much on a boat but being in it. Poisoning might be OK if it is one that causes you to pass out 1st but one that make you writhe on the floor foaming at the mouth, no. There is a lot of ways death can find you but many never think about it until it happens; they wake to a burning building around them, they get swept out to sea by the under tow, etc.

@majorrich –It might be more, it could be a tractor trailer rig full of engine blocks that flipped over the rail of the freeway above you and lands on your vehicle.

tranquilsea's avatar

@Hypocrisy_Central Thanks for playing :-) Me? I would rather be shot than stabbed, freeze to death than burn to death and crushed than drowned.

WestRiverrat's avatar

The man in black would take at least two to the chest and one to the head. Then I would go about my business.

rebbel's avatar

I don’t get the three X two locations, when there are ‘only’ three ways of dying.
Why not three locations, or six ways of dying?

stranger_in_a_strange_land's avatar

I’d randomly choose one of the locations/means for myself. I’d never let if pass to another. Perhaps I’d waste the dude with the sunglasses and see what happens?

dynamicduo's avatar

I would spend 13 of those days hunting down that man in black, cause if I’m going, he’s damn well going too. Provided that did not negate my death, I’d get really really intoxicated and go meet my death in one of the two ways that is not being burned.

Skaggfacemutt's avatar

Dang! That sounds like the old “would you rather slide down a 50-foot razor blade or suck on a boy’s nose until his head caved in” that we used to contemplate in grade school.

josie's avatar

See @WestRiverrat
Assuming no other choices, Bald Sunglasses gets a double tap in the chest and one in the bald head

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

I’ll take death by fire

Cruiser's avatar

I will dodge this bullet by offering up a bound and gagged MIL as a peace offering!

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