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curlyz's avatar

What is the best age to get married?

Asked by curlyz (1194points) July 17th, 2010

At what age did you got married? Do you think it was a good decision?

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23 Answers

mrentropy's avatar

I think it totally depends on the people, their goals in life, and their personalities. To me, it seems impossible to just pick ages and give an answer.

This, of course, coming from someone who got married in his early 30s, which failed, and his late 30s, which was plagued with problems. I guess in my case, I should never marry or even be involved with someone.

john65pennington's avatar

I was 21, my now wife was 18. was this a good age for us? apparently so, we are still together after 44 years.

I think your question’s answer really depends on many variables. some of these are both mature people? have they a plan for their life together? how many children do we want? financial stability is very important. and last, but truly not least is the love and respect you two have for each other.

In later years, my wife has told me that when she met me and we dated, she wondered what our children would look like. she was not disappointed. two children, a boy first, the girl second.

We were blessed.

nailpolishfanatic's avatar

I don’t think there is an specific age that you are supposed to be to get married. Just get married when you find that right person, you don’t get bored seeing every freaking single day. Also get married when you feel the time is right not just because you think you love someone.

p.s Im 16 so I don’t know when I’ll get married:D

LuckyGuy's avatar

Before you have kids.

NaturallyMe's avatar

This is very subjective, and there’s no particular age anyone can ever say in general that is the best age to get married. Having said that, I think that one needs a little life experience before getting married, so before 20 may be a bit young, although i know that many have gotten married before that and are living happily ever after.
I got married 1½ months ago and i’m 31. Although i’ve been with my husband before that for 12 years. But there was no particular reason for waiting until this age, we were just trying to get as financially set and indepedent as we could before we did it.

curlyz's avatar

I agree, there are tons of variables, and each person is so different. I got married when I was 19, and I thought I would divorce him in the same year, it was rocky. But, many years had passed, still married and it seems like it’s working. So, it depends, every case is individual.

Marva's avatar

I got married at 26. Then divorced at 30…
I can’t even say it was a mistake, it was the right thing at the time, it had helped both of us develop in ways we wouldn’t have developed otherwise, then seperation became right aswell. Luckily, we didn’t have children…
Looking into it now, I would say 30something is a better age for marriage, because people are more crystallised and mature and that increses the chances for a relationship to last. Even then, it doesn’t mean it will…

tinyfaery's avatar

When you just can’t imagine spending another minute without that person. I was 27, my wife was 21, and we had only known each other for 3 months. It’s 9 years later and we are doing great.

However, I wouldn’t recommend it for everyone. We are very lucky.

whatthefluther's avatar

I first got married at 34. But, I didn’t have a “real” job (career path) until I was 26, having partied pretty strong for four years after graduating from college (oh, ok, so I partied it up some while in college after being a good student but fairly wild in high school). I bought my house at 29 and settled in and began to date women that shared an active lifestyle and similar goals. I honestly do not believe I was mature enough to marry until I was about 29. But, of course, everyone is different. Ideally, you’ll know best when you are ready. I do suggest you give it lots of thought and careful consideration (unless, of course you fall madly in love like @tinyfaery, above , and just know in your heart it is the right person at the right time in your life).
See ya…..Gary/wtf

Aster's avatar

I was 20; he was 25. Right age for him but 20 is too young for a female I think. Although
I recall feeling not being with him was Torture! Did he feel that way? I have no idea.
I couldn’t wait a second to escape from him 19 years later.

jerv's avatar

My wife and I were 26, had been dating for about six years while I was in the Navy, and living together for three of them.

We are still in love over nine years after tying the knot, so I think we made the right choice by waiting until we were both adults and had proven that we could live with each other for a long time before making it official.

tranquilsea's avatar

I was 21 and my husband was 23 when we got married. We have both been extremely committed to each other no matter what happens and a lot has. We’ve been together for 16 years now and our relationship is better now than it was primarily because we have worked hard on it for those 16 years.

Age doesn’t have as much to do with whether or not it will work. As others have stated what matters more is how much you love your partner and how willing you are to stick with it and get help when you need help.

Seaofclouds's avatar

I got married right after turning 20, had a child right before turning 21, and my husband walked out when I was 22 (we were finally officially divorced when I was 24). Getting married to him was a huge mistake and I saw tons of red flags. I just chose to ignore them because I got caught up in the wedding details.

I got remarried at 27. My husband was 33 when we got married. We are doing great. I had my career settled and was in a much better place at 27 (even as a single mom) than I was at 20.

It all depends on the couple and where they are in life.

Neizvestnaya's avatar

Once you believe it’s better to skip saying ugly things up front than to lay it all on the table and forgive as you go.

Once you feel no shame, guilt, burden or whatever to ask for what you want and what your partner wants.

Once you are will to accept sometimes it won’t be about who’s “right” as it is about choosing what works best for two… or more.

Once you believe in not walking away any time you’re fed up, taking for granted you can come back and “work things out”. In a real marriage then people don’t take time outs to go off and do their thing while they learn the value (or not) of their previously chosen partner. Make the pledge and work to keep bitterness from having a spot to take hold.

Once you can look at your partner and know of yourself that you love them out of choice instead of guilt, peer pressure, default or responsibility.

Once you respect, appreciate and revere your partner to where you want to share them with the best other people in your life and share with them all the best things you’ve experienced or want to.

chels's avatar

Whenever you’re ready.

reijinni's avatar

I’m 30 and still single. My time may never come.

YARNLADY's avatar

When you can support yourself and possibly a family.

knitfroggy's avatar

I got married two weeks before my 23rd birthday. It seemed like the right time, and I guess it was. We have been married almost 12 years now.

IcelandicCarly's avatar

The best time to get married is when you are both find happiness within yourselves individually; and that happiness grows when you are together. You have to be willing to give more of yourself than you ever though possible and forgive the little and the big things often. That is when you are ready.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

I really think it should be after 25 – that’s when the brain has been fully myelinated (probably the only time I’m going to get all biological essentialism on ya’ll)...for most people…that being said, the first time I got married, I was 20…he was 27…we got divorced eventually…the second time I got married, I was 25…he was 28. We have a very strong marriage.

meagan's avatar

I’d probably say 27.

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