A clever response when someone asks if your jewelry or diamond is real?
I don’t want to be nasty, but rather than answer the question with yes or no, would prefer a clever response that begs the question.
Observing members:
0
Composing members:
0
33 Answers
It is but my breasts aren’t.
Ask if you can scratch their glass eye to prove it..or maybe not ;)
Well, since a lot of times they say “is it real” and not “is that a real diamond” you can say “yes” because of course the ring is real, as evidenced by it’s physical manifestation. The only fake rings are the imaginary ones.
You could also say “I don’t know, I swiped it off of a pirate when we were in the Bahamas.”
It’s as real as your hair color.
Heck yeah, at least that’s what Sauron told me.
My insurance company prefers that I not say.
Always shut down a question by responding with a question. Such as, why on earth would you ask such a question?
I like this question…. You could ask them, ‘Why? Are you planning on stealing it?’ or Tell them you left all your ‘imaginary’ jewellery at home today. ...
I like @UScitizen ‘s idea… ‘What kind of question is that? Are you a jewel thief?’
The other approach is to not answer the question. Such as, De Beers doesn’t deal in fakes.
@cazzie ‘Why? Are you planning on stealing it?’
Best so far.
I like “why on earth would you ask such a question?” I agree with @UScitizen
Puts it right back on them.
It’s nothing more than a figment of my fevered imagination… and if you can see it that must mean I imagined you as well.
Look down at your hand and say “what ring?”.
Say “That depends. How much money you got? ”
My jewelry isn’t but my breasts are “real and they’re spectacular.” (Courtesy of Seinfeld.)
As oppose to your teeth/breasts/smile, you mean?
“It apparently exists in one form or another, so of course it is real!”
Lie, baby, lie. Whats the point of buying a fake diamond then?
And how incredible rude is it that people would ask?
@meagan It’s one of those things that are incredibly socially acceptable, but upon closer examination, is actually really rude. Like consoling any woman of a certain age about her lack of husband or children without finding out if it’s of her choosing…
Last I knew it was, at least that’s what the Cracker Jack box said.
Where did you learn your manners?
Absolutely not you foolish girl, those are kept locked safely away. I am appalled that you are so ill-mannered to ask such a rude question.
One thing is real for sure, you’re sorely lacking good manners.
I would be more than happy to answer your question if you would sign a waiver for a national survey that I am assisting with. We want to identify which areas of the U.S that tend to have the best and worst social manners.
Do I look like a person who would wear fake diamonds?
It doesn’t require an answer.
How about responding with a sincere smile and then a question…”How is/are you/your…doing?”
Answer this question 
This question is in the General Section. Responses must be helpful and on-topic.
Composing members:
0
