Social Question

bob_'s avatar

What did you learn the hard way?

Asked by bob_ (19700points) July 19th, 2010

You live, you learn, but sometimes learning can hurt like nobody’s business. Has this happened to you? Will you tell us, so that we don’t have to go through that?

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51 Answers

christine215's avatar

That getting married at 19 was not a very good idea for me

CMaz's avatar

Never do drugs.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

I’ve learned to value and respect all people and their views. Having some loved ones ripped out of your life will teach that pretty quick.

Austinlad's avatar

That credit cards are dangerous
That being too candid in the workplace is risky…
And that I’m not the marrying kind.

Aethelwine's avatar

I’m the only person that can make me happy.

mrentropy's avatar

You can’t change people.

aucurtis's avatar

When depending upon others, everything takes a lot longer than expected.

bob_'s avatar

If you’re a guy, and you go to the beach with other dudes, don’t worry about it not looking “manly”, let your friend apply sunblock to your back.

cookieman's avatar

That sometimes you gotta shut up and tow the line. at my first job ever – age 14
That being top dog in one arena does not guarantee success in other areas. first year of college – age 17

Cruiser's avatar

Don’t drive fast on snow covered side streets, you will total your car.
Don’t push an upright grand piano all by yourself you will herniate a disc.
Don’t preheat a gas grill and leave it unattended, it just may start on fire and almost burn down your house like mine did this weekend.

RealEyesRealizeRealLies's avatar

@ChazMaz Never?

I understand the concerns for recreational drugs every day out of teenage boredom, possibly leading to depression, antisocial behaviors and addictions. But what about spiritual pursuits?

Let me clarify that I’ve never done LSD, Psychedelic Mushrooms, or DMT, however, I’ve researched those “Sacred Medicines” and the cultures that promote them for spiritual enlightenment. They recommend no more than once a year, to participate in some form of vision quest, or shamanic guided experience. When taken in a ritualistic manner, with great emphasis put upon the sacred connection with the planet and universe, there is a great deal of evidence to suggest that these “medicines” can actually be catalyst for curing all sorts of ailments from addictions to personality disorders.

It has me very curious.

Jude's avatar

I have been known to have a case of foot in mouth syndrome.

I should have kept ‘er shut.

RealEyesRealizeRealLies's avatar

Never marry a supermodel. N-E-V-E-R… at least not until her career is over and she’s toothless and haggardy, with silicone dripping from every seam.

janbb's avatar

Don’t pull out in front of a “blind” curve.

IchtheosaurusRex's avatar

Don’t have expectations going into a romantic relationship with someone.

RealEyesRealizeRealLies's avatar

Sunlight is healthier than light from a computer monitor.

Dr_Dredd's avatar

That I should make you a sandwich.

ucme's avatar

Never under any circumstances ever attempt to pull up your zip on a pair of jeans/trousers whilst wearing a hard on. ARRRRRRGGGGHHHH!!! Tears to my eyes just thinking of that fateful day. Still, could have been worse. I mean her husband could have caught us. Now that would have been a story worth telling.

john65pennington's avatar

When first married, if you cannot afford it, do not attempt to buy a whole housefull of new furniture, at one time. this cost us an arm and a leg back in the 60s and on a cops salary, we financially struggled for 6 years to pay it off. not cheap furniture. we still have it today.

NaturallyMe's avatar

That you can’t trust people, no matter how sad and desperate and truthful-appearing their stories may seem.

BoBo1946's avatar

stay away from Drama Queens!

Aster's avatar

Never take that first prescription sleeping pill. NEVER.
Never stop exercising.
Never put your house up for sale in this market.
Never think, “that wouldn’t happen to me.”
Never believe, “this man/woman is Perfect !”
Never believe, “he/she will be faithful forever.”

perspicacious's avatar

most everything

Otto_King's avatar

Learning to drive is an unfinishable school of life.

Facade's avatar

Doctors don’t know everything, and sometimes they just don’t give a shit.
Do what makes you whole instead of trying to fix other people who don’t want to be fixed.
Don’t go from training 20+ hours a week to doing absolutely nothing. Your body will hate you.
Drinking water is very important.
Heed your inner voice, whether you believe it to be God or just your own conscience.
Eat when hungry; sleep when tired.

jazmina88's avatar

The difference between use and abuse.
That your Momma isnt always right and shouldnt always listen.
That not everybody has good intentions and a pure heart and you need to be cautious…....
and Follow your instincts and Your heart is true.
protect yourself.

bob_'s avatar

@Facade What happens when you go from training 20+ hours a week to none?

kenmc's avatar

Do good in school.

Facade's avatar

@bob_ Deterioration, I’m guessing. Just an overall yucky, useless, weak feeling.

Pied_Pfeffer's avatar

* Don’t be overly curious about Dad’s razor blade dispenser or Mom’s birth control wheel dispenser (age 6)
* Don’t back out of the garage before looking in the rear view mirror. Someone might have parked their car in the drive-way (age 42)
* Don’t marry a man just because he looks like Richard Gere from “An Officer and a Gentleman” in his dress whites (courtesy of my sister)
* Don’t try cutting tree branches with a chain saw when there is a power line running through it (courtesy of the ex brother-in-law)

Dr_Lawrence's avatar

Do not marry someone because you think they really need you and because you believe you can help them and make them happy.

Never let the woman you remarry make or push you to make drastic decisions about your children from a previous marriage.

Never imagine that blending two broken families from divorce will make one whole family.

tinyfaery's avatar

I still haven’t learned a damn thing, even though everything has been hard.

christine215's avatar

If you treat someone badly enough times they’re going to leave and never come back

Coloma's avatar

The usual biggy…that you cannot change anyone except yourself.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

That medicine isn’t god, that people are scared of love, that quitting SSRI’s cold-turkey can just about kill you, that people don’t like it when you have depression because they only care about themselves, that blood doesn’t make a family, that my body can deliver a child without contractions..etc.

lloydbird's avatar


But it was/is fun.

Scooby's avatar

Women are very complicated beings! :-/
When playing hard to get! :-/

zophu's avatar

No one knows everything. In fact, almost all people are generally clueless and spend most of their time trying to hide the fact. They even go so far as to teaching children their nonsense to try and give it some solidity. It’s a hard lesson to learn how to unlearn, even as an adult.

downtide's avatar

Don’t let other people’s expectations get in the way of pursuing your dreams. If you plan your future to please someone else you’re going to be disappointed.

janbb's avatar

Still trying to learn not to push people too hard!

hug_of_war's avatar

When a friend or lover uses the words forever, take it with a grain of salt.
It takes a great deal of courage to not live your life for others.
If there is something visibly different about you, people will ask, and over the years it can make you feel different from everyone else.
Baking powder and baking salt can’t be substituted for one another.

SmoothEmeraldOasis's avatar

Not saving or having a home for the children or having too many bills.

Jeruba's avatar

Expectations lead to disappointment.
Your expectations belong to you, and you are responsible for them.
You don’t have to suffer.

YARNLADY's avatar

That I actually could live without the one I loved.

judochop's avatar

- Words are just in fact that and no matter how well you say things your actions will always speak distances a lot more clearly.
– People do not show their true colors until after you fall in love with them.
– You can’t run from problems. They are never behind you.

mattbrowne's avatar

Don’t send out angry emails.

Scooby's avatar

When I was married I did lend my wife my car once! she wrecked it! :-/

SmoothEmeraldOasis's avatar

That some people only want from you what you have or what you can do foe them. Well, selfish, selfcentered, don’t care what happens to you.

woodcutter's avatar

don’t work for cheap. You will lose a lot of respect that way.

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