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Vincent_Lloyd's avatar

If a friend said a girl/guy likes you, and another said the guy/girl didn't. Who would you believe?

Asked by Vincent_Lloyd (3007points) July 24th, 2010

Okay I’m relating this with the issue I have on my hands, in my head and on my back. Who do I believe? My friend Alexa told me that Amber likes me just that she can’t go out. And I know Amber really trusts her like I do. But then a girl named Kiana said that she doesn’t like me but wants to be friends. Then one of my friends that I didn’t like in the beginning (she my friend now these days) told me that a long time ago she said that my haikus I write for her are a creep or something relating to that… (I would know how that would feel towards her) There are so many feelings I don’t know who to believe now…Should I believe my best friend or two individuals that barely know her, yet still friends with her? I’m so confused I’m starting to get depressed from it…(Haven’t eaten in 3 days from it….)

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14 Answers

zophu's avatar

Cut out the middlemen and stop diving yourself crazy. Eat a wholesome meal and talk to Amber. The worst that can happen isn’t that bad, and it probably wont be the worst that could happen.

downtide's avatar

Neither of them. They both might believe that they’re telling the truth but unless they are telepathic, and have got inside Amber’s mind, they’re both only guessing. Even if Amber has said something to them she may not have been telling them the truth, or she may have changed her mind in the meantime.

The real question should be, do you like Amber? If you do, go up to her, tell her that you like her. Her reaction will tell you whether she likes you or not.

Oh and eat something. Passing out in front of a potential girlfriend isn’t going to make a good impression. :)


Many times the beliefs that form in your mind, as a result of hearing so many conflicting opinions, not only confuse you but will make you depressed. I know, because I had that happen to me too when I was younger. The most important advice I can give you my friend, is don’t be deluded by these “thoughts” in your head. They are only thoughts. The fact that Amber acknowledges and appreciates your haikus and thinks it’s sweet of you to write them, and the fact that the two of you have had such a long relationship (3–4 years you said?), attests to the fact that she “does” care about you, and that she does like you. Personally, I wouldn’t put much stock in what “anyone” says, except Amber herself. Words are very arbitrary, and they can be thrown around in the form of gossip and misconceptions. Actions speak louder than words, and since Amber still receives you willingly, you should assuage yourself of the anguish you presently feel. Don’t burden and torture yourself over what “others” have to say. Find and develop trust between you and Amber, from the way you and Amber associate with each other everyday——that is where reality lies, not from the words of others, and certainly not from the “insecurities” that result from believing what others say.

Again, always take care of yourself first my friend, before worrying about others. Love between two people is a wonderful thing, but never compromise your well-being.

MissA's avatar

There is much good advice in the few answers thus far. I can understand your feelings and it is hard to believe right now…but, you will get through this just fine.

You are going through emotions that will build your character.

marinelife's avatar

Until evidence proves otherwise, I would believe your best friend.

Frenchfry's avatar

I skip all that go ask the girl. Simple.

le_inferno's avatar

Just approach Amber and say, “Listen, people are telling me a bunch of different things about your feelings for me, so I thought I’d get my facts straight and ask you.”

Dutchess_III's avatar

Ask Amber! And stop sending poems to girls that you like, unless you’re SURE said poems are welcome. Yes, it’s creepy to have a guy that you don’t really have any interest in sending you poems and stuff. Feels like stalking.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Don’t leave it wide open for friends to tell you either way. Just go ask her yourself. I know it’s hard, but sometimes you just have to get up the nerve to do things like that. =0)

Dr_Lawrence's avatar

Amber is the only one who might know how she feels about you. Talk to her and ask her how she feels about you? If she wants to know how you feel, she will ask you too.

Jabe73's avatar

I agree with @zophu and @le_inferno here. There are too many varied reasons why different people may be giving you different answers. Sometimes if someone already likes you themselves they may give you a negative answer.

AnonymousWoman's avatar

If this ever happens again, don’t rely on hearsay. She is the one who knows the answer, so talk to her about it. Ask her about how she feels about you and tell her that her words mean more to you than the gossip you’ve heard.

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