Social Question

TexasDude's avatar

How do you deal with loneliness when visiting people isn't an option?

Asked by TexasDude (25249points) July 25th, 2010

It sucks being effectively nocturnal, as well as someone who thrives on the company of others. I usually stay up until about 6 am and it gets extremely lonely at those hours. Everyone’s asleep, nobody is on facebook, sleep isn’t an option, and playing Super Mario isn’t filling the void anymore. I thrive on the company and conversation of others, whether real or virtual, and this is getting old, so I have to ask my fellow social butterfly insomniac Flutherites: How do you do it? How do you alleviate your loneliness? Keep in mind that this isn’t a “you should drink warm milk and just try to sleep” discussion. Sleep isn’t happening. My circadian rhythm just doesn’t work that way.

So… how do I fix this? How do you fix it?

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29 Answers

YARNLADY's avatar

I haven’t noticed that having people around or not has much to do with how I feel. I am quite comfortable either way.

meagan's avatar

Uh hello. Become friends with me! Looks like we’re on the same sleep schedule.
I don’t keep a lot of “normal” friends that are married with children. The freaks come out at night, so I’m stuck with the freaks ;)

And I totally agree. Playing Mario Kart with kids in Korea just isn’t the same anymore. bahaha

TexasDude's avatar

@YARNLADY, I usually deal with being alone fine. During the day. There is just something about the night that makes me exceptionally lonely.

@meagan, Hi Meagan. You are now in my fluther.

Dog's avatar

Often I find fellow soul mates in Fluther Chat. Sometimes we are there all night chatting.

Aethelwine's avatar

PM me and I’ll give you my sons name. He’ll be 18 in August, will be attending WIU, and keeps the same hours as you.

He needs to get out more….help!!!!

Dr_Lawrence's avatar

It is not uncommon for me to be up late to 02:00 mountain time. That’s 05:00 Eastern time.
Look for me, I’d be glad to talk with you PM me. I have unlimited long distance! Let me know if you want to talk.

Nullo's avatar

Make some friends in Europe.

meagan's avatar

Exciting! Hello, new internet friend. Feel free to keep in touch any time you get lonely. I’m usually online at night, seeing as I have a terrible job that lets me work from home.

TexasDude's avatar

@Dog, how do I get there? I’ve never been…

@jonsblond, haha, I feel for the kid. It’s a tough existence.

@Dr_Lawrence, I sincerely appreciate the offer, Dr.

@Nullo, Hahahahah. I lol’d hard.

@meagan, Awesome, thanks!

Dog's avatar

Oh sorry- I should have posted the link!
On regular Fluther there is a button on the top of the screen but on mobile it is not there.


stranger_in_a_strange_land's avatar

I’m nocturnal by nature, but being a farmer works against that (I usually function on 2 hour naps). I’m a loner by nature, but have taught myself to tolerate being around others if professionally necessary. My friends and acquaintances are almost entirely online, which I find comfortable as F2F social interaction confuses me. Chat rooms don’t work for me as I’m a slow typist (even slower being temporarily left-handed) and not good with small talk or quick verbal comebacks.

I’ve found that I can go on Fluther and a few other sites almost any time for PM conversation. I can be a sympathetic chatterbox (some would say drama queen) where in real life I’m very quiet and reserved. The internet is an Aspie paradise, too bad it didn’t exist until I was in my mid 30s.

In short, my “fix” (except for one lovely young lady) is the internet. Right now, Cinderella is sleeping and I’m Fluthering.

Nullo's avatar

@Fiddle_Playing_Creole_Bastard It’s not really all that hard. I started plugging in random chat addresses once, and ended up with a UK-based conversation partner for a while. And I met one of my better friends – this one in Germany – through a fanfiction site. All while I was living in a 20×30 box of a dorm room, in one of the smallest, most remote cities in Missouri.

TexasDude's avatar

@stranger_in_a_strange_land, Fluther is helping so far. I’ve got a few other sites that I’m able to PM and IM on as well, but most of them die down around midnight. Thanks for the tips though.

@Nullo, that’s actually pretty helpful. Thanks Nullo. I like international folks.

stranger_in_a_strange_land's avatar

@Fiddle_Playing_Creole_Bastard I also fool around with my shortwave set, trying to DX difficult stations. I used to like the BBC World Service, but they’ve turned into crap over the last decade.

TexasDude's avatar

@stranger_in_a_strange_land, that’s fascinating… the pre-internet chatroom!

Coloma's avatar

I’d just strap on those dueling pistols and go for a walk to the local donut shop. Probably have a nice conversation with some donut dunkin’ cops. lolol

Berserker's avatar

I’m not a social person at all, so I don’t think I can help very much. However, this doesn’t mean I don’t get lonely, and you probably guessed it by now, but watching movies, especially horror movies does help me a lot. If you can’t find anyone to speak with, maybe undergoing some activity which really immerses you is a good idea, but yeah it doesn’t always work.
I guess you could always go on a surprise trip to a bar, but that takes money, and it doesn’t always include the most interesting people to get together with.
Hmm…how about…pirate music ? :)

augustlan's avatar

I’m usually here all night long. PM me anytime. :)

TexasDude's avatar

@Coloma, that’s a good way to get shot… or a good way to start an indie comedy.

@Symbeline, you’ve already helped. I’m gonna go watch Trick r Treat. ;)

@augustlan, thank you so much!

Nullo's avatar

@Fiddle_Playing_Creole_Bastard It has occurred to us that ICQ has a random chat function, whose use will pair you at random with another ICQ user.

Berserker's avatar

@Fiddle_Playing_Creole_Bastard Make sure to watch that little cartoon in the extras. :) If that doesn’t cheer you up, nothing will. :D

TexasDude's avatar

@Symbeline, I saw it on youtube actually!

Berserker's avatar

@Fiddle_Playing_Creole_Bastard Did you like it? I think it’s the cutest thing ever. :D

TexasDude's avatar

@Symbeline, I love Sam, he’s adorable…. when he has his hood on.

happy123's avatar

well i would prefer a dog but a cat would be ok or any other kind of animal.:) they sure will give you some company at 6 am. but make sure tht you let them rest as well. because its not their fault tht you want to stay up at 6 am. but im sure a dog would love to cuddle up with you and help you not feel lonely. :) hope it works

Response moderated (Writing Standards)
Frenchfry's avatar

I go on the internet. I have found some wonderful online friends.

Austinlad's avatar

Lose myself by watching one of my favorite old movies.

kenmc's avatar

I’m on a similar schedule. Working nights doesn’t help, but if I was jobless, I’d be on the same time.

Like @Dog said, there’s fluther chat, but its been down hill as of late. I usually just watch tv, have a couple beers, and try to write something.

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