Social Question

InkyAnn's avatar

"Large" women in "Small" clothes?

Asked by InkyAnn (2441points) August 8th, 2010

Before I start I want to state that this question may be something of a controversial one.

I will see women of a “larger proportion” wearing clothes that I personally deem “inappropriate ” for their size. Clothes that show their stomach hanging out or shorts and or skirts that are way too short and barely fit, pants that are way too tight and (not to be mean) but their “fat” is hanging out over them. (And so you all know I am a female that has been both “large” and “small” in my life and I am very picky about what parts of my body I will or will not show due to my size)

Don’t get me wrong part of me is proud to see a plus size women who is not ashamed of how big they are and will strut their stuff and not conform to “societies” standards of “only skinny girls should wear these things” but at the same time (again not to be mean this is just my PERSONAL opinion) I don’t really want to see it. Yes I think a “skinny girl” in a mini skirt and halter top looks better than a plus size girl in the same thing.

This is something people don’t voice their opinions about much, but I am asking you… what is your HONEST” opinion on what you think when you’re out and about, be it shopping or at a bar, and you see a girl in clothes that society considers “too small” for her. And do you think it’s more acceptable for a “skinny” girl to wear “slutty” clothes than a “large” girl

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52 Answers

Facade's avatar

My honest opinion is that I actually wouldn’t mind Gail getting in on this one.

JLeslie's avatar

I could care less. But I have relatives who cannot stop from commenting. It usually goes like this, “does she even look at herself in the mirror?” Now, I will admit if I am with the person I might care more, but if it is some stranger with a really bad fashion sense, I don’t care. And, when I say care, I do not mean that I care that they are overweight, I am just commenting on their fashion sense.

ETpro's avatar

Some men (and women) are strongly attracted to plus size women. I suppose that is who they are strutting their stuff for. If you don’t find the look attractive, look elsewhere. :-)

Frenchfry's avatar

Maybe they got fat and can’t afford a new wardrobe, or they think it sexy. To each her own but it does not bother me.

InkyAnn's avatar

@ETpro yes yes thats fine and dandy and all but the question is what do YOU think when you see this…

MacBean's avatar

It doesn’t bother me any more or less than when skinny people have skin sticking out all over the place.

Mom2BDec2010's avatar

It doesn’t bother me unless they have stuff hanging out everywhere.

jeffgoldblumsprivatefacilities's avatar

Psst, large men do this also.

InkyAnn's avatar

thank you everyone for your answers!! I cant help but to wonder though, do you have the “balls” to actually say on here what you think at the moment you see this? Be it “oh good god! or “Damn girl thats what im taling about!” even if its something people might conciser mean?

MacBean's avatar

I don’t think I think anything at the moment I see it. I tend to just take everything in and then process it and form opinions later.

FireMadeFlesh's avatar

People should be able to wear what they want. I do not live in an Islamic state, so women have the right to express themselves however they like. That said though, I wish more people would think of obesity as a disease and a health risk rather than being the natural size for some people.

AC's avatar

The older I get and the more life teaches me about the value of good people, I care less and less about the external “beauty” attributes of a person. As a man I think the magazine fuelled “norm” is oppressive to lots of women and personally when I see people in the way you describe I think “good for you”. I do admit to thinking that the extra weight (if we are talking seriously over weight) could be unhealthy, but also consider that it’s none of my business anyway. Regarding “slutty” clothes, I see larger women who dress in this way as brave, vivacious and fun, and as sticking a finger up to the world. That’s different and therefore interesting.

chocolatechip's avatar

I don’t need to see anyone flaunting their corpulence, but it is their right to do so if they wish. Generally speaking however, you should wear clothes that actually fit you. This applies both to large people wearing skinny clothes, and skinny people wearing large clothes (i.e. people who think wearing a shirt so big it makes them look like a walking torso is cool).

InkyAnn's avatar

@FireMadeFlesh im not saying that we should live in a place like that or that its wrong to be of one size and not allowed to wear something of a smaller nature, YES women Do have the right but what i was getting at is weather you think its ok from the bottom of your heart people will still have that negative thought even though they know its wrong and shouldnt think that… what is that thought you that you have

InkyAnn's avatar

@AC i love your answer

AC's avatar

@Inked_up_chic Thank you. You raise a controversial and good question.

FireMadeFlesh's avatar

@Inked_up_chic I don’t have an eye for fashion, which is why I didn’t say anything about what it does for their image. I honestly don’t pay attention to what people wear, so I don’t think good or bad of their choice in clothing. I am also trained to look at people’s body shape regardless of what they are wearing, so a large person will look large to me no matter what they wear.

InkyAnn's avatar

@AC Thank you, and I knew it was going to be… I guess im challenging people to be completely honest about something that most would lie about or think of an answer that would make them look like “good people”. to put themselves out there and for once not care how someone would judge them for a humanly natural thought that may be a good natured one or a negative/mean one

InkyAnn's avatar

@FireMadeFlesh so with a “non-fashion sense” aside would you have any thoughts about a person if you saw say 300 lbs woman in a string bikini? even if its an “omg” or a “hell yha you go girl!

meagan's avatar

I think its just as inappropriate as a small person having their stuff hanging out.
Honestly, bigger people probably wear smaller clothes because they want to be able to “fit” into a size smaller.
Like those jeans everyone has in their closet, ready to wear after they’ve lost 5–10 pounds.
Maybe these people barely fit into their “skinny jeans”, are proud that they’ve gotten legs in, and want to strut.
Doesn’t make it look any better. But I don’t want to see anyone’s stomach, small or big.

InkyAnn's avatar

@meagan thank you for being honest

AC's avatar

@Inked_up_chic I suppose you are bound to get the “on the balance of everything and removing my stereotypes/reactionary bias what do I really think” response from people as people here are generally open minded individuals and consider before they write. I said generally. If at the core of your question is another question of “do you stereotype or measure the value of people due to their size and how they dress” I must answer honestly and say yes, sometimes, but only in so much as the thought might pop in to my head.

However, it’s how you challenge your own snap decision making that counts and being able to realise what put those precepts about people there in the first place – i.e. socialisation/media. Maybe even your own value of you.

So it’s a bit like saying I’m never racist or never sexist. It’s not true but people don’t like to admit that.

InkyAnn's avatar

@AC you truly are an honor to converse with :) yes i suppose the heart of my question was do you “stereotype” weather in your head or out loud and what is it you say or think… but I figured i would give people the benefit of the doubt that i wouldnt have to spell it out for them and so far everyone has been doing a wonderful job!

FireMadeFlesh's avatar

@Inked_up_chic Well if you want to take it to extremes, yes that would disgust me.

woodcutter's avatar

i really don’t want to see camel toes on a plus sized gal, c’mon just do me this one favor hunn?

InkyAnn's avatar

@woodcutter LMFAO! I dont know what to say to that one :P

@FireMadeFlesh Thank you for your honesty

rooeytoo's avatar

I like to see tasteful clothes on people of all sizes. But if anyone wants to have assorted skin patches and body parts hanging out, it is their privilege.

AC's avatar

@Inked_up_chic Thank you. It will be interesting to see where this thread goes from here on.

downtide's avatar

I think everyone has the right to wear whatever they choose, for starters. Personally I prefer larger women, but I like to see them wearing clothes that fit. However I would still rather see a larger woman “flaunting her corpulence” (as @chocolatechip said) with confidence than a skinny girl whose clothes look like they’re hanging off a pile of sticks.

NaturallyMe's avatar

I personally don’t find it attractive at all (in male or female) and i think it’s a little ew because i find it so unattractive. Of course they have the right to wear what they want and i’ll never tell them to do otherwise (i don’t personally know someone who does this however). So honestly i don’t really care what they’re wearing, i just don’t like to look at it. Also, if it were me, i’d never dress like that because i don’t think it looks good, or nice, or even comfy.

Pied_Pfeffer's avatar

What people decide to wear in public is fascinating. Sure, there are times when I do a double-take and wonder, “What were they thinking when they put that on?” And yes, I’ll admit that it’s judgmental, but it isn’t out of disgust. The only time it makes me feel uncomfortable is when they are constantly tugging at their clothes…I assume they they don’t feel comfortable wearing what they have on.

ucme's avatar

I feel the same if it’s a guy or a girl, a bit of sick threatens to come up but doesn’t quite manage it. It’s like seeing a hippo in a tutu, funny but stomach churning at the same time. That’s my honest answer, brutal as it may be.

Pied_Pfeffer's avatar

@ucme Whatever you do, don’t check out PeopleofWalmart.com. You’ll be barfing the rest of the day.

ucme's avatar

@Pied_Pfeffer Sweet Jesus. Large loading bay aisle four.

Pied_Pfeffer's avatar

@ucme I told you not to look.

Facade's avatar

I love that website

ucme's avatar

@Pied_Pfeffer Yes that’s true you did. I have no excuse.

sleepdoc's avatar

I would not say that it is for this particular situation, but I have had the thought pop in my head a few times, let me buy you are mirror if you don’t have one.

ETpro's avatar

@Inked_up_chic What do I think. Depends. Some look sexy and others look unsightly.

jca's avatar

i had asked something similar a few months ago – i see heavy women in clothes where their stomachs are hanging over the pants and their butts don’t seem to fit into the jeans. I think if you’re heavy, fine, whatever, but dress appropriately, in clothes that fit. i don’t mean wear a muumuu but wear something that fits properly.

JLeslie's avatar

I guess thin people are wearing stuff very tight, and poorly fitted also in my opinion, so maybe it is just that everyone is wearing it as a fashion statement? Like letting a bra strap show on purpose. I also realized after thinking about it that I look at it differently depending on the age of the person.

rooeytoo's avatar

@JLeslie – I know you are not nearly as old as I, but it is funny how things change and you reminded me with the bra strap remark. I am amazed that showing bra straps, underpants is now a fashion statement. Actually I see girls show their entire bra and boys with their whole Calvin clad butts hanging out. I always figure if their mother told them to dress like that, they would pitch a fit. We saw a young boy the other day with one of those ski caps, the kind with ear flaps and strings on the flaps. Remember we live in the tropics, the sweat was pouring down his face. And I thought again if his mother told him to wear that he would be mortified.
Same with some of the amazing hairdos. It is a funny world!

jca's avatar

i find it unattractive when girls who are chubby wear low cut jeans with their muffin tops hanging out over the top of the jeans – it’s like, know who you are, how you look, and dress appropriately. i work in an urban area, and all the time i see girls walking on the street with really tight clothes on, especially now that it’s summer time, and these girls are round round round. they look ridiculous, i see them and i’m like “Oh my God.”

InkyAnn's avatar

@jca thank you for your honesty! like i said part of me is like more power to ya girl, but theres that other part of me thats like please cover up a lil more…

shpadoinkle_sue's avatar

I know what you mean. Hot Topic had some really awesome clothes I wanted to wear, but they didn’t fit right. Finally, Torrid came out. So happy that day! It is a bit hard to find bigger girl clothes that don’t make you look like an old lady or give you a weird shape. There’s a kind of dress I wnt to wear but I can’t because, on me, it looks like a muu-muu. Sucks, so maybe some girls just wear what they can find at affordable prices.

Aethelwine's avatar

@Inked_up_chic I find it interesting that you are only thanking those that agree with you for their honesty. Do you really find it that hard to believe that some people don’t think rude, judgmental thoughts when they see a heavy person in small clothes?

My first thought is either:

1. They don’t care what other people think. Good for them!
2. They don’t have the money to buy clothes that fit them properly.

My honest answer. and I’ve got the balls to say I really hate it when people make fun of others for the clothes they wear.

InkyAnn's avatar

@jonsblond First of all no i’m not thanking only them for their honesty because they think the same, they just are the only ones that SAY what they think when they see this, everyone else that doesn’t mind it is just saying “it doesn’t bother me”. That does not tell me what their thinking, just that they could care less. they’re not even saying “it doesn’t bother me so when I see this i think ”good for them!” like you did (thank you btw)

This whole thing was about what you think when you see that not does it bother you or not. I wanted to know what are the actual thoughts people truly think.

And congrats on “having balls” you must be proud. In-turn to your little jab ill feel free to say I have the ovaries to tell people that have no idea what they’re talking about WHERE THE HELL DID YOU GET THAT? NO ONE IS MAKING FUN OF ANYONE FOR BEING BIG AND WEAR LITTLE CLOTHS unless you are soo much better them the natural thoughts of the human race take your foot out of your mouth. Get over it! Were discussing how we feel about this, not in a chat room putting fat people down.

JLeslie's avatar

@rooeytoo Funny enough my grandma would have been fine with the bra strap on younger people, she was very fashion forward. She once bought me a shift/dress that looked like lingerie to me, she was fine with it, I felt uncomfortable with it and exchanged it for something else (it was not showing too much, it was more related to the material it was made out of then whether it was skimpy or not). To stay with the topic at hand, my grandma would agree that how much you weigh helps determine what is appropriate to wear. If I had had a role of fat across my middle, I am sure she would not have bought me a dress made out of that flimsy material.

Aethelwine's avatar

@Inked_up_chic Chill. I was never yelling at you. Yes, people are making fun of how others dress. Just look up a few posts. the people of walmart site

You were the one to mention “having the balls” to say what we really feel, so that’s what I did.

Pied_Pfeffer's avatar

@jonsblond You are right. I should not have posted the link to the Walmart website. Please note that is not limited to overweight people. That website screams of photos of people looking to achieve a shock factor by their clothes, the vehicles they drive, their make-up and hairstyles.

What people choose to look like in public is okay with me, as long as it is within the law and not hurting anyone. I am just being honest saying that some appearances cause a second-glance reaction from me, and yes, I admitted to being judgmental. It doesn’t stop me from chatting with them, and I can’t recall a time where I’ve said to someone later, “You’ll never guess what I saw…” Despite that, it still doesn’t make it right.

I’d love to someday achieve a purely unbiased look upon others’ appearance. The more I experience differences, especially through travel to other countries, it seems to help. For now though, I just haven’t been able to flip that switch to “off”. It is still a knee-jerk reflex in some cases.

Aethelwine's avatar

@Pied_Pfeffer You have every right to post that link. It just upsets me when people are made fun of by the clothes they wear and where they shop. I know many people hate Walmart, but take it out on the business, not the poor people that shop there. Just something I feel very strongly about. No biggie. :)

FutureMemory's avatar

I don’t understand why anyone gives a shit enough either way to actually have an opinion on the matter. I think people should dress more outlandish than they currently do, whether it’s going out naked or wearing clothes that people deem inappropriate or whatever. I want to see more fat bellies hanging out and more bra straps and more clown suits and even more dudes wearing skirts and make up. At least then I would have something more interesting to look at than the endless droves of spike-belt teens with skinny pants and 1980s style glam metal hairdos.

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