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Ranimi23's avatar

Should I keep old love letters?

Asked by Ranimi23 (1914points) August 14th, 2010

I’m in the middle of cleaning the drawers in my study room. I found love letters written when I was a boy at school. Letters she wrote to me. Today she is happily married and we do not keep in touch. I’m afraid to open and read them again on the other hand I do not feel comfortable throwing them away.

Do you keep old letters? Love letters?

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24 Answers

SamIAm's avatar

yes keep them!!!

Dr_Lawrence's avatar

If you keep them and have a current S/O they may pose a future problem especially if you keep them hidden.

Jude's avatar

Keep them. Why are you afraid to read them?

Austinlad's avatar

I agree with @Dr_Lawrence. It may be sting a bit to do so but, but dump them. Old baggage. Keep the memories tucked away in your heart, not a drawer.

AmWiser's avatar

Personally, I think it is good to keep old letters and memento’s. First its a reminder of who you are and where you came from in life. Second, you never know who’s going to be famous one day and you have proof of knowing them. Third, try to never become involved with someone who is threatened by your past if they say they love you and you love them. So keep the letters until you feel really really comfortable in destroying them.

chyna's avatar

Yes! I have letters from 35 years ago and I do re-read them about once a decade.

ducky_dnl's avatar

I have old love letters from a boy in third grade. I also have a whole folder dedicated to messages my friend (who passed away) and I shared together. Those are staying with me and going nowhere. If someone..say a boyfriend in the future has a problem with it, oh well..I’ll miss ya whoever you are.

Just keep them.

perspicacious's avatar

Do as you like, it’s not really a big decision at this point. Or it won’t be until your future wife finds them.

filmfann's avatar

Keep them. Once you get rid of them, they are gone.
But for goodness sakes don’t read them…

Frenchfry's avatar

It is good to be sentimental fool. Atleast to me. YES Keep them. I wish I had. I have every love note my husband and card he gave me in and th e first rose securely dried in a book.

Pied_Pfeffer's avatar

If you have the space to continue to store them, there seems no reason to throw them away if you are not yet comfortable in doing so.

From the way the description is worded, it sounds like there is still a bit of affection on your part, even though you’ve come to terms with the fact that she is no longer available. If this is the case, then there is still a bit of healing that needs to happen. Re-reading the letters may reopen the wound or it might help heal your heart.

Have I kept old love letters? Yes. Last year, I started a major house-cleaning project in preparation to move to another country. With the old letters, I reread a few, and it was like opening up a time capsule. Some brought back fond memories, and another set helped me realize how utterly doomed one relationship was from the start. They ended up in the recycle bin and won’t be missed. As Austinlad said, the memories are tucked away.

deadhead's avatar

No,people should not keep old love letters especially if they are in committed relationships or are married.

stardust's avatar

Keep them :)

LuckyGuy's avatar

Keep them. You can always throw them out. But once gone, they’re gone.

They are part of your history even if you are in another relationship. They helped form you into the good person you are today.

wundayatta's avatar

Absolutely you should keep them! They are the history of your life. They are primary documents. It has nothing to do with subsequent lovers. You aren’t interested in her any more. But you should be interested in your own past, and in keeping records that help you figure out how you got to be who you are now.

Seaofclouds's avatar

It’s completely up to you. I personally never kept things from past relationships, but that’s me. I have every letter my husband has ever written me. Things from past relationships got destroyed when I was in the process of getting over the relationship.

If you want to keep them, then do that. As others have mention, this could cause some jealousy from future girlfriends if they were to find them hidden away somewhere.

aprilsimnel's avatar

Keep ‘em. They’re your history.

Winters's avatar

Yeah keep them. I reread them sometimes to refreshen my memory of things, and sometimes to have a good laugh at myself for being so driven by hormones.

Vincent_Lloyd's avatar

Hey I like your Avatar. I love Simba! =) And yes and no. I think you should keep them since it’s a good memory to keep and they sound like something precious. But no since if you have a girlfriend or wife they’ll think that the love letters are from another significant other that you’re hiding from the one that you’re with now. Basically she’ll get the wrong Idea for no. But I think I would keep them except I would tell her first since it wouldn’t look like I would be keeping it a secret for a long time if she found out about it in the future. But it’s all up to you. Do YOU want to keep it. I say yes for you, just remember to tell her about them first.

Ranimi23's avatar

@Vincent_Lloyd 10x :-)
There’s no feelings for her today. This youthful love is ended and we do not keep any touch. Just I feel uncomfortable throwing the letters away (about 12 letters). I am very afraid to sit and read all the letters, because it might remind me of myself or things I may not want to remember in my past. I have changed a LOT.

Vincent_Lloyd's avatar

@Ranimi23 Yeah I know what you mean. But if you don’t love her then don’t be afraid to read them. I know how you would feel. They’re old love letters and I wouldn’t feel comfortable throwing them away either since it’s something I would keep as a reminder that I had a good relationship between the girl from the past. And yes I know, but sometimes you need to get reminded of who you were in the past to relate to the future. And yeah it’s something I would think about when I’m older. I’m still naive now, and loud and what not. But it’s always good to look at the good AND bad stuff. You can’t always have good in your life, there has to be a bad. It’s like…The world with no darkness. It wouldn’t work at all. Sorry if this doesn’t really make sense….

second_guessing's avatar

I would keep them, but if you do not want to relive memories, put them in a box and place them in the attic/basement out of eye shot.

flutherother's avatar

I would keep them. You don’t have to read them. But perhaps some day you will. They are a part of your life.

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