My friend just got me punched in the face, anyone wanna console me?

It was my buddies bachelor party tonight. Great night overall. Strip clubs, alcohol, etc. I was the sober one because I don’t drink so at the end of the night I volunteered to drive the groom home (he hadn’t drove himself there). Well we’re walking out to my car, and the groom is understandably drunk beyond all belief. We’re crossing a street and he’s going slowly and some guys are going buy and shout “Hey get out of the street asshole!” To which my drunken friend responds something to the effect of “Go to hell bitch!”

Well go figure, these two guys slam on the breaks and back the car up (nearly running me over) and pull up to us. Well my friend is drunk and has pretty much already forgotten what he said, and I try to mediate and say “hey he’s drunk, he doesn’t know what he’s saying, its his bachelor party, i’m sorry” But before I can even finish the sentence (and offer them some of the vast quantity of beer I have left) the passenger punches my friend in the face, then me in the face, and they speed away.

I was ok overall, but my buddy (the groom) bled pretty profusely for a minute (luckily I had a rag in my car and I gave him one of the two shirts I was wearing once we cleaned him up). Ended up having to stop at an all night pizza place and clean him up in the bathroom before taking him home to his fiance who was up waiting for him.

I am pretty ok with it. I’ve been telling myself that these two middle aged fat black men driving a beat up car at 3am in the middle of the city probably have amounted to nothing and will amount to nothing in their lives, and its downright pathetic that they resort to this type of stuff. Meanwhile my friend and I are both college grads, one getting married, doing well for ourselves.

But somehow its not quite taking the sting out of my two front teeth (though seriously you should see the guys knuckles, lol)

Anyone wanna talk me up?