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musicislife75's avatar

How can you figure out if your parents are your actual parents with out getting a DNA test?

Asked by musicislife75 (97points) September 2nd, 2010

I want to know if there are ways to figure out if my parents are actually my parents with out getting a DNA test. I have looked at my birth cirtificate and my parents names are on it. And my mom says I am her child. But I am not convinced that I am their child. I am nothing like them in any shape or form. And if you look at my brothers and sister, you can tell that they are my parents children.

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21 Answers

janbb's avatar

We all often wish or think we are not really our parents’ child, but if their names are on your birth certificate, I would bet dollars to donuts you are. In addition, you are, no doubt, your own unique wonderful self.

Seaofclouds's avatar

A DNA test is the only way to really be sure. One thing that you could compare your blood type to your parents blood type. It won’t tell you for sure that you are their child, but it could tell you that you may not be their child. Do you know their blood types or your own blood type?

Seaminglysew's avatar

Do they love you, care for you, support you emotional?? Then they are your parents. I think everyone goes through a stage where they may question this, but when all is said and done, the ones that would lay down their lives for you, are your parents.

chyna's avatar

What color are their eyes? From what I understand, two blue eyed parents, or a parent with green eyes and one with blue eyes can’t make a baby with brown eyes. However, parents with brown eyes can make a blue or green eyed child. This is not fool proof.
My mom has a lot of explaining to do on this subject however. I have brown eyes, they don’t.

Ben_Dover's avatar

Did you try asking them?

FireMadeFlesh's avatar

Try looking for shared traits. If one your parents have a cleft chin (colloquially a “bum chin”) then you definitely will. Eye colour is not a great indicator, because there a four genes that control eye colour, so there are many combinations. Other things to look for is whether or not you and they can curl your tongue, and whether or not you are colour blind.

@Ben_Dover “And my mom says I am her child.” It seems they did.

musicislife75's avatar

@Seaminglysew They have never cared for me or supported me.

@Ben_Dover I tried talking to my mom about it…she says I’m hers.

@FireMadeFlesh There are no similar triats besides my mom having brown hair and my hair is somewhat brown. But thats the closest trait I have to either of my parents.

MissAnthrope's avatar

I have had the same feeling all my life, so I know where you’re coming from. A part of me was always convinced that I was not actually related to my parents. I’m very different from both of them in terms of personality and I never really looked like them, either. Over the years, I started to notice resemblances to my maternal grandmother and parents, not to mention the realization that my personality is exactly my paternal grandfather’s. I came to be satisfied that I am truly related to these people after all. I will say that within the past couple of years, almost everyone started commenting that I look just like my mom, even though I still don’t really see it.

I think the problem here is genetic variation and gene expression differences. The code that makes up what you look like cover a ton of variables.

“Think about the probability of drawing four aces in a hand of poker — and that’s just 52 cards,” Burke says. “We’re talking here about 100,000 genes that get reshuffled with every generation in a complicated process that, truth be told, we really still don’t understand.” (University of Michigan genetics professor David Burke)

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Seaminglysew's avatar

I am very sorry to hear that. I couldn’t imagine some one not supporting their children. I hope that you have the love and support of some good friends who will Love and support you. I wish you that. Whether you believe or not, God loves us all.

FireMadeFlesh's avatar

@musicislife75 Is your/their hair thick or thin? Have you tried curling your tongue? Do you/they sunburn easily or not? Are you/they artistic? Shared traits aren’t always obvious.

rebbel's avatar

“Other things that are passed on with dominant and recessive genes are: the shape of your earlobes – the gene that makes earlobes hang down a bit are dominant, the gene that makes earlobes attach directly to your head are recessive; hand clasping – if you clasp your hands together as you normally would and your left thumb goes over your right, you have the dominant gene; cleft in the chin- the gene which causes a cleft is dominant (though for some reason, women tend not to be as affected by this).” source

BarnacleBill's avatar

See if you can find pictures of your mother when she was pregnant with you. Does she have the card that was in the basinette when you were born? That sometimes has a footprint and fingerprints on it.

Pied_Pfeffer's avatar

Your birth certificate is pretty much your ticket to a guaranteed answer, depending upon how old you are and who issued it. Older birth certificates have some sketchy details. Not all children are born in a hospital, where the records are more likely to be accurate.

If your siblings are older than you and were old enough to remember your mother being pregnant with you, that’s a good sign.

Genes are a funny thing. Unless you understand how they work, it’s easy to doubt when you look different than other family members, unless it is blatantly obvious. There is always the chance that your mother is your biological mother, but your father isn’t.

Personalities are a whole other matter. I strongly believe that part of it is nature and part nurture. I have three siblings, and while we have a few similarities, we also have more differences. It’s often the same case for twins.

The only way to solve the mystery is a DNA test, and even those are occasionally wrong. Sometimes, it’s best to just let it go.

filmfann's avatar

What are their blood types and what is yours?

Don’t freak out. We are in the age of the home video camera. They probably have home movies showing your mom pregnant with you.

chyna's avatar

@filmfann There are no pics of my mom pregnant, with me or my 3 brothers.

musicislife75's avatar

@filmfann there are no videos that i know of. there are some of when we were really little but that doesn’t really prove that they are my biological parents.

BarnacleBill's avatar

Ask your mom’s friends about what her pregnancy was like.

RealEyesRealizeRealLies's avatar

@musicislife75 “They have never cared for me or supported me.”

Huh? How old are you @musicislife75 ? That sounds like something a young rebellious teenager would say.

If what you say is true, absolutely true, then you would have been removed from their care by the state a long long time ago, regardless if they are your biological parents or not.

Nullo's avatar

Some high school bio, a list of dominant and recessive genes, a Punnett square, your and your parents’ blood types, and you’ve got a fairly good chance of arriving at a satisfactory answer.

As stated elsewhere in this thread, if it’s on the birth certificate, it’s almost guaranteed to be true.

And if it comes out one day that they really aren’t your biological parents, rejoice! It means that they chose you specifically. Not many kids can say that.
Could you give some examples of their neglect? As @RealEyesRealizeRealLies said, the presented attitude is fairly common amongst teenagers, regardless of the actual quality of a person’s upbringing.
I remember thinking pretty poorly of my parents when they took away my Pokemon cards because my grades were bad. It wasn’t a big deal, in retrospect, but man did it seem evil to me then!

musicislife75's avatar

@RealEyesRealizeRealLies I am 18. I have always questioned if they were my parents since I was little….so it couldn’t be the whole teenage thing.

Adjo's avatar

This is something I think you should just leave alone and I mean that in the nicest way possible. If your parents love you (regardless if they are your real parents or not) then they love you. Don’t worry yourself or fret over something when you have two wonderful parents who love you and have provided for you. I would put a smiley face on here but sometimes people get mad at me for it.

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