Why is Homophobia found to be any less acceptable that Homosexuality?

I don’t like the way this sounds either. It just sounds wrong, I know. I’m sorry, but I’ve been trying to shoot a hole in the logic all day and I can’t figure this out. Please help me understand this.

First off, phobia does not equal hate. A phobia may be irrational, intense, and cause fearful aversion, but it is not hatred.

As Wikipedia states:
This is caused by what are called, neutral, unconditioned, and conditioned stimuli, which trigger either conditioned or unconditioned responses.

And even more interesting is this statement:
An American study by the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) found that between 8.7% and 18.1% of Americans suffer from phobias.

Now correct me if I’m mistaken, but don’t many Homosexuals tout approximately those same percentages when estimating their own frequency?

Ok, so here’s the puzzle. I cannot find any notable differences in these two truth propositions:

1 – Regardless if one believes that Homosexuality is good or bad, right or wrong, genetic or choice, learned or inborn, one must acknowledge that Homosexuality does in fact exist, and should be considered with the utmost respect and understanding, free from the judgmental charge of ignorant hatred.

2 – Regardless if one believes that Homophobia is good or bad, right or wrong, genetic or choice, learned or inborn, one must acknowledge that Homophobia does in fact exist, and should be considered with the utmost respect and understanding, free from the judgmental charge of ignorant hatred.
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Do you see my point? If it’s really a phobia, then it’s no different than any other phobia and should not be used as a global term of insult to those who are irrationally fearful of Homosexuality any more than the term Acrophobia would be used to insult a person with a fear of heights.

When the fear is beyond one’s control, and if the fear is interfering with daily life, then a diagnosis under one of the anxiety disorders can be made.

Shall we consider Homophobia as an anxiety disorder? Sure why not? But shall we then expect to see Homophobics stand together, suffer through ridicule as Homosexuals did, to one day find Homophobia declassified as an anxiety disorder? This sounds eerily familiar to when Homosexuality was declassified as a psychological disorder 30 years ago.

I propose the word Homophobia should be used more carefully in the future, and only in a clinical context. I propose it should not be used as an insult towards those who suffer genuine fear of Homosexuality.

I propose that we carefully point out the differences between those who fear Homosexuals, and those who actually hate Homosexuals.

I propose that we coin a new word, Hatero-sexual, to define those who actually express hatred towards Homosexuals, thereby distinguishing those who hate, from those who fear.

Where am I wrong?