Social Question

Vincent_Lloyd's avatar

Are you afraid of the silence?

Asked by Vincent_Lloyd (3007points) September 18th, 2010

Okay, so this question came to me from a song and my sister, since she brought it up to me. But when two people talk and there is silence do you try and break it by talking or bringing up something? I usually try that since it feels like I should be doing something instead of just sitting there. Yes I know there are the awkward silence were you just ended with a topic that was very….Weird. But I’m just talking about just something regular like talking about a game, or how the two of your lives are doing, etc, etc…So do you guys break the silence or enjoy it?

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27 Answers

Kayak8's avatar


muppetish's avatar

I’m not afraid of silence and avoid filling the gaps in unless I have something to say. I find that pauses in conversation are only “awkward” when we make them awkward.

Gamrz360's avatar

@muppetish I agree…. akward silence…..........

heresjohnny's avatar

It depends. With people I just met or don’t know very well, I’ll usually try to avoid silence and continue small talk, but for close friends, I don’t mind silence at all. I’m a pretty quiet person so I don’t talk much (I prefer listening), and it’s kinda nice to have little silences every once in a while.

Aesthetic_Mess's avatar

Yes. I hate awkward silences. I don’t like silence at all. I can’t even go to sleep without noise.

CyanoticWasp's avatar

One year while I was in college my dad got me a construction job on the project he was managing, working for his employer. Naturally, since I lived at home and we worked the same hours, I rode back and forth to work with him every day that summer. The commute was an hour each way. Some days we hardly said a word to each other, not out of anger, spite or any contention, but just because.

Those were some of the best times in my life, conversations, silences and all.

marinelife's avatar

Silence is very comfortable for me and my significant other.

DrasticDreamer's avatar

Not at all. I think those afraid of silence have more to fear than silence itself. It can actually be pretty telling when someone can’t simply be with another person.

ucme's avatar

Yeah those pregnant pauses…...................can be… laboured :¬)

Frenchfry's avatar

I relish it, but I have a kid.

zophu's avatar

Silence is only a problem if there’s a misunderstanding being neglected.

Whitsoxdude's avatar

Honestly, I don’t notice it. I just go back to thinking about life, the universe, and everything.

YARNLADY's avatar

I don’t think I have heard silence in a very long time. I don’t put on the TV or any music, but even when I am alone here in the house, I hear a constant hum from my computer, and the keys go click, click. I also hear cars outside, appliances inside, birds chirping, squirrels chattering, my dog making various noises, misc creaking and cracking of the house.

Artistree's avatar

I’m sitting here on my own and I wasn’t afraid of the silence until you just brought it up.

Trillian's avatar

“You talk when you cease to be at peace with your thoughts;
And when you can no longer dwell in the solitude of your heart you live in your lips, and sound is a diversion and a pastime.
And in much of your talking, thinking is half murdered.
For thought is a bird of space, that in a cage of words may indeed unfold its wings but cannot fly.”

downtide's avatar

I am comfortable being on my own in silence. Being in a group of people when everyone else is silent, that gets me on edge and I don’t like it.

Pandora's avatar

I only hate sitting in silence if I’m having an event in which I am in charge or when sitting among a bunch of strangers at a gathering.
Among family. No problem but then my family all love to talk and joke, so I rarely know a silent moment. But I can sit quietly and listen for a long time. I at least need to hear others talk.
Now during the day alone. I can go hours in silence. I actually like it some times. It all depends on the situation and my mood of the day.

stardust's avatar

I’m not afraid of the silence. I agree with @DrasticDreamer

mandybookworm's avatar

I tend to create the silence and make things akward among my friends without even realizing it most of the time… I don’t care, but I think they do…

hobbitsubculture's avatar

I’ve noticed that more extroverted people tend to assume that any silence in a conversation is an awkward one. Once in that situation a friend said to me, “Well, this is awkward, isn’t it?” But it hadn’t been on my end.

downtide's avatar

@hobbitsubculture silence in the company of others always feels awkward to me.

georgetony's avatar

can enjoy the silence…

hobbitsubculture's avatar

@downtide Out of curiosity, are you a more talkative, extroverted type person, or more introverted?

A silence tends to feel more awkward around people I don’t know as well. My partner and I never have awkward silence, though maybe we did many years ago. I’ve known the friend I mentioned above for five years, and am reasonably comfortable around him.

@georgetony Depeche Mode?

Vincent_Lloyd's avatar

@hobbitsubculture & @georgetony I love that song! “all I ever wanted was here, in my arms. Words are very unnecessary they can only do harm.

CyanoticWasp's avatar

@Vincent_Lloyd if what you say is true, then every comment you make here should be moderated off the board on the assumption that you’re trying to do us harm.

I think that words are sometimes necessary, and they don’t usually do harm. But I usually have the minority opinion around here, so maybe I’m wrong about that.

hobbitsubculture's avatar

@CyanoticWasp “Words are very unncecessary” is part of the quote from the Depeche Mode song.

downtide's avatar

@hobbitsubculture I’m more extroverted, definitely. My partner is an introvert so I’m not uncomfortable with silence around him, because I know it’s normal for him. But among friends, or people I don’t know as well, it’s different.

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