Social Question

bude57's avatar

Sexual situation. right or wrong?

Asked by bude57 (16points) September 25th, 2010

I’m a 10-year divorced male of 53 years of age. In those 10 years, I’d seen 2 woman at different times. I am not involved romantically with anyone at the moment
Woman 1: A 42 year old woman I’d seen over the years and is living with a man who doesn’t want sexual relations with her, but wants her around. She came to me for this purpose, and we are good friends and share other non-sexual activities together.
Woman 2: Had lived with me for 6 years. She opened up credit cards in my name, maxed them out. When I came home from work one day I found her in my bed with another man. I kicked her out of my home. And now she wants sexual relations with me after she moved in with the guy (I took him into my home when he was losing his home).
I’ve never been on this side of a situation. And though I’d love to have a relationship again one day, is seeing either woman sexually a good idea until then?
NO! I’ve never been a cad before. And neither woman is married.
Your thoughts?

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9 Answers

marinelife's avatar

Why would you want to have anything to do with a woman who opened false credit in your name and cheated on you?????? Why did you not prosecute her????

In the case of Woman 1, you are asking for trouble. She is involved with another man. You only have her word for it that it is not sexual.

Find a bed partner who is yours and yours alone.

bude57's avatar

I hear ya with Woman 2: I thought I was in love with her, thus I lagged on the prosecution. When I found her with the other man, I wanted to prosecute, but they said it was too late. Yea…I was incredibly stupid with that I know.
And I hear ya with Woman 1. You are most probably correct with your scenario.
Plus, I’m not dumb. If they both want to do it with me, I’d only guess that they are already doing it with other men besides there boyfriends. And at my age, I don’t need the diseases.
Thanks for your response! I

tedibear's avatar

I wouldn’t get sexually involved with either of them. As Marinelife says, go find someone new who is free to be with you.

chyna's avatar

I can’t believe out of all the single women out there, you would choose to involve yourself with two who are not single. Are you just too lazy to find someone on your own? Do yourself and those men a favor and leave the two women alone.

Blueroses's avatar

It’s never that easy, is it? Why are you attracted to either?
I have a friend who is constantly drawn into the same drama… he falls for a woman and she cheats on him and then he allows her and her new man to live with him. Why? He is attractive and caring and he refuses to give up on people who he loves. As his friend, I shake my head and ask “why?” repeatedly.
Is it easier for you to want to be with someone you already have a history with than to explore new territory?
Do you really think you are being good for those women by giving them a supportive ground?
Do you like being controlled by things outside your influence?
Do you enjoy being the “fallback” guy?

loser's avatar

I’d get a woman #3.

SuperMouse's avatar

I agree with those who say to move on from both of these gals and find another one. There is absolutely no reason to be with a woman who is with someone else – regardless of what their relationship might be like. There is also absolutely no reason to be with a woman who ripped you off then high-tailed it out of there. So move on from the both of them and find someone who will commit to you and treat you (and your credit) with the respect you deserve.

GeorgeGee's avatar

You know the answer. As a divorced man you are aware of the heartache and distress a bad relationship can cause so stop repeating old mistakes. Get on a web dating service, set up a lunch date and meet a willing stranger. And accept that most of them will be unsuitable, that’s the nature of the beast. Enjoy your lunch, enjoy meeting someone, and don’t feel any pressure to have things “work out.” When magic enters the equation, you’ll know it.

bude57's avatar

Thank you all for your input, I realize that you are all correct in your responses. I’m just gonna leave the two alone and concentrate on bettering myself, another woman will come into my life eventually, and I will just learn from my mistakes. Thank you all again!

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