I have a tendency to disappear, and I can't stop myself from doing so. Thoughts?

Hello everyone. I am 24. But since childhood I’ve dealt with gender identity problems, which I managed to repress for quite a while by creating fantasy worlds and false identities. However right about my 20th birthday it became increasingly hard to keep my act together. I began to systematically withdraw myself from my social circles still unaware of why I needed to do this. By 22 I had faced the truth of my childhood problems and begin to connect the dots. Ever since I’ve been carefully exploring my feelings but still feel a great deal of anxiety when my old (and some newer) friends try to reach out to me. I want to be forgotten, but that doesn’t seem to happen.

Everyone who’s known me usually say I’m a nice person, good friend and I understand it may seem odd that I just suddenly disappear, but I just can’t help but want to be isolated. And just now someone texted me asking if I’m still their friend, and I feel bad, but they have no idea what I’m dealing with, and I’m not ready to share.

How do you suggest I handle this?