Secret loneliness and self-fulfilling prophecies. How can I overcome my anxiety?

This is a wonderful website and I’d love to get some feedback on my own situation. I’m a 22 year old girl and I am incredibly afraid and anxious around men. I have no negative experiences with men, rather an overall lack of experience at ALL. Nothing. I’ve never been in a relationship, never been kissed, never been on a date, never even done something as innocent as hand-holding. I am aaabsolutely attracted to men, but I can’t overcome the fact that there’s clearly something wrong with me and I’m not good enough. Each year I think I’ll get better, but I never do. It’s absolutely killed my self-esteem over the past two years. I avoid male cashiers at stores, male waiters in restaurants, and I’m so sick of it.
I’ve psyched myself up so much that I’m at the point that I absolutely cannot picture myself ever in a relationship. I know my mind is my enemy in this, but I’m desperate for help because I just don’t want to do this anymore. I’m so upset right now.
How do you conquer negative thoughts against yourself? Has anyone been in a similar situation? I’m sorry if I’m rambling, I’m just so upset right now. Anything will help. I’m too ashamed to consult my friends. I just want to be normal.