How could you, or should you, talk to a teenage family member who committed a heinus crime?

This isn’t a hypothetical for me, unfortunately.

I’m a hold-the-family-together type of person. Since my mother died my older sister’s family has gone off the rails. It was off the rails prior to my mother dying actually.

My sister has been in an emotionally/financially/physically relationship for 27 years. Her husband is a manipulative, extremely intelligent drunk. They had one child who had a pretty awful childhood. They later adopted three boys from the foster care system. bad, bad, bad I know

My nephew did something completely heinous and it only came to light shortly after my mother died. This is a kid who I provided care for, who was raised alongside my son, who I tried to encourage and support. I haven’t spoken to him since I found out two years ago. I don’t know how to speak to him.

He was arrested, sentenced and has since been released and is nearly through with his probation.

I have recently re-established contact with my sister. I know the question is going to come up about re-establishing contact with my nephew.

The thing is that I don’t know if I’ll be able to. I don’t know if I could see him without completely losing it on him. But the other side of me thinks he should be given another chance. That what he did shouldn’t be a life sentence.

Most people in my situation would write my sister and her family off. I can’t do that though.

Has anyone here had to deal with a similar situation? If you did how did you handle it?