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Should parents have favorite kids?
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November 6th, 2011
Favoritism exists in all families. It is normal. No two children are identical and no two parents are identical. Parents have preferences for children of given ages, temperaments, abilities, or interests. What is important is that
• families be honest about the existence of favoritism. When feelings about favoritism are unspoken or denied, the wellbeing of the family is threatened.
• families talk about favoritism, maybe even joke or laugh about its existence. Without language and respectful dialogue, resentments and other discomforts build, emotionally jeopardizing the well being of all family members.
• all children in a family have the experience of being the favorite. When favoritism flows from one child to another, all children can benefit from its potential rewards and no one child is as vulnerable to its potential negative consequences.
[fragment from psychology today]
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