Is aging a cruel joke or what?

Getting older or, as the saying goes, “long in the tooth.” Ears keep growing. Noses keep growing. Bellies keep growing. Hair—not so much. And what’s in the hair down there… If you’re a female and want it to stay cozy tight, it grows loose; while if you’re a male and want it to grow bigger and harder, you’re definitely out of luck. There generally comes the time no amount of Viagra has the power to resurrect its former glory. Why do the things I want little keep growing longer while the one thing I’d like to see getting longer goes in the opposite direction?