Can you have a dead "soul mate"?

I found this singer who died a few years ago…and it’s weird. I already knew about him because I heard of him 3 years ago…but his music didn’t really make sense to me.

I’ve been depressed all my life…well…oddly enough since after he died. I’ve just always had an empty feeling. And I was listening to a song by a similar artist and just thought of him out of the blue. I looked him up, listened to a song, and it was so eerily relatable. It just sounded beautiful when a few years ago I wasn’t into it at all.

And now the feeling is a lot stronger. The empty feeling. It literally feels like a black hole has been placed in my chest and it’s just this sad, insatiable, feeling. I don’t know what came over me yesterday but I was inconsolably depressed. The feeling was so bad I just had to yell into my pillow and cry until I fell asleep. I feel like it’s because of him. As stupid as that sounds. I feel like I’m grieving for someone I loved and knew, but I never knew him in life.

Me and this guy did have a lot in common. VERY similar early lives. Bad stepfathers, moving away from our mothers at the same age. And he even had clinical anxiety and depression like I do. He was also into Hinduism, which is something I became interested in long before I found him again.

And in Hinduism they believe in soul mates.

I just needed to say something about this because everyone thinks I’m insane. But I really do believe in soul mates.

Please be kind…I know “soul mates” and mythology aren’t everyone’s cup of tea. I’m just asking out of curiosity and looking for opinions.

(Another note, I have a problem with sociopathy…not the type that makes me want to kill people, but more in the form of Asperger’s. I’ve never been able to truly connect to ANYONE emotionally and I’ve definitely never felt such greif, so this is new and overwhelming to me)