How do I deal with classism in NYC?

I love living here. But one of the things that irk me about this place is the prevailing belief that someone’s salary/social prestige = their worth as a human being.

My partner is an attorney and with a small, family practice who grew up middle class in Queens. I grew up middle class in a small, kind of depressed part of NY. He makes decent money and I make ends meet with my salary. We have a nice, rent-stabilized one bedroom and enjoy some of the finer things in life, but keep a budget and don’t go overboard. We both have student debt that we’re working on paying down. Because we both work jobs that are partially commission based, we’re kind of frugal to account for some “lean months” when we don’t earn as much.

Even though we have our struggles sometimes, we’re thankful for the life we have and feel very fortunate and hopeful for our futures.

Unfortunately, we come into contact with a lot of class-conscious and competitive people. A few examples:

- Friends trying not-so-subtly to figure out how much we earn/acting competitively about salaries, consumption, and material wealth.

- That same person implying that we’re insolvent because we live in a rent-stabilized, moderately priced apartment in a less expensive neighborhood instead of owning a condo.

- Going out with people and being asked to play “credit card roulette”, which is just a douchebag move.

- People comparing credit cards to ascertain status/wealth

- Someone implying that I grew up in a low-income household because I’m from a rural part of the state and my late mother was “just an RN”.

I’m growing really weary of this. Unfortunately, I cannot avoid all of these people so I need to learn how to deal with them. Have any of you ever been annoyed/affected by classism? How should I respond to this behavior?