How do you deal with a time when you feel as if people close to you are basically forcing you to act in a way that'll hurt them?

I’ll make this short (hopefully) and I need your help:

I don’t have a good relationship with my father and I’ve had a very rocky one with my mother for over the past 10 years…during my first marriage, my ex and I moved into my parent’s house (we had the 2nd floor and paid for it)...in many ways it didn’t work out and when I got together with my current husband, I moved out (long story) but when I was about to give birth to my second son, we moved back in, because sometimes it all works out, because they help us financially and with kids and because I’ve been raised to feel guilt about leaving and being independent…yet again, I find myself at a crossroads because it’s NOT working out and we can’t really manage to move out (unexpected lay offs, etc.) but eventually we will and it’ll be this big scandal because they don’t think I have the right to do so without their input but I can’t tolerate this life anymore…so please, any words of help will do…obviously no one’s forcing me to move out, but their actions and words are ‘forcing’ me to decide against them…oh yeah, my aunt and grandma also live in the house and everyone will say that by taking the kids away, I’ve taken their happiness…and my happiness is irrelevant