Pathetic inability to move on, or love?

My former best friend dated the same guy the last two years of high school. And the entire time, I liked him, and I was convinced he had feelings for me. A year later while I am away at college, he calls and admits his feelings for me and says he wants to be with me. He was going to break up with my friend for me. I told him that I had feelings for him as well but he was dating my friend and I couldn’t hurt her like that. He broke up with her, my friend blamed me, and we haven’t spoken since. As for the guy he tried to call me soon after but I was too upset to deal with any of it.
Then I found out he and my former friend got back together.
It’s been two years since that happened, and over those two years he has contacted me several times, wanting to strike up a friendship again. I have always ignored him. (Mostly because it hurt too much to talk to him) Recently I talked to him on the phone for several hours and it was just like it had always been.
Today, i find out that they have broken up. I don’t know what to feel, I can’t think straight. I have always thought about him, and secretly hoped they would break up so that i would finally have a chance with him, but how I am very confused. I feel stupid for even posting this ridiculous question. But do I actually still have feelings for this guy? If he were to contact me, should I give him a chance? Or am I just holding onto the past too tightly?