To ask, or not to ask -- that is the question.

I have a friend who recently started doing something special for all her friends on their birthdays. To my knowledge, no one has ever asked her to do this. She just does it. It’s a gift that she makes herself, and people cherish them because they are always personalized.

When my birthday came around, I was really looking forward to this gift. I really wanted to see how she sees me. However, there was nothing on my birthday. I began to wonder if she had forgotten my birthday, but in our next phone conversation, a few days later, she wished me happy birthday, and then moved on to other things. Actually, she said she wanted to give me something else—again, something personal, but not something nearly as important to me as what she had given everyone else.

So here’s the question. Did she forget to make me the special present? Was she unable to make me that present? Did she deliberately snub me?

I wish I could ask her if she was going to make the special gift for me, but it seems like it would be very awkward for her, if she didn’t intend to make me something. It wouldn’t be personal if it were done because I asked her, instead of from her own free will. Yet, I’m trying to figure out why she didn’t give me what she gave everyone else that she’s pretty close to. It really bothers me.

Should I just suck it up and take my disappointment quietly? Should I say something?

She’s been a friend for not very long, and she’s really busy—under a lot of pressure from work. I really don’t want to bother her at a time when she is focused on other things.

I just don’t know what this means. I also don’t know what it will be like if one of our other friends notices that I didn’t get one of these gifts. One of life’s strange complexities, I guess.