I am a needy Boyfriend, I "NEED" some advice?

well let me way in. I am new to this site, and I was doing some research on myself. you see I am a clingy boyfriend. I also suffer from issues with depression and mania. Which by the way, sucks. B/c you can’t slow your mind down from thinking irrational thoughts. I have pushed my gf to a point we don’t even talk right now. I won’t talk to her to this sunday night. No communication. No IM’s, No Emails, no nothing. It sucks. I love this girl. we have been together for 6 months, and we have gone to Costa Rica and had amazing experiences. I love her like there is nothing else in this world. And ya know.. it scares her. She has been previously married, and has a 4 yr old. I am 35, shes 27, so not a large age gap. I think a lot of her “disappointment and anger” is b/c of things from the past. I am annoying her now. Which in a loving situation, should not occur!!!
Anyway, I am now spending a lot of time with friends, etc, giving her the desired space. I haven’t spoken to her today. I did last night, I told her goodnight that turned into a toxic arguing fest.
She has basically said that my insecurities and issues have really hurt us to a point it has made our relationship toxic and hurt us long term.She is understandably apprehensive of taking the long term approach. Her actions have been, and I think for the best, is tough love. Don’t enable me to keep wallowing in self pity. I had lunch today with two close girl friends from work. Their advice, very simple. Don’t contact her, don’t even see her Sunday night (which I need advice.. should I? I have been a pretty crappy person lately). I had a mania episode on Monday where I acted like a complete psycho and did not show “who” I was. she is concerned and rightfully so that this is ME, and not just an isolated occurrence. The story kind of goes like this. Last week, we were having a debate on a touchy topic, I thought I had offended, her so of course I was like “Baby, I am sorry” “I apologize if I offended you” well I spent the night (Tuesday) we did not make love b/c she was “tired” which is fine. That happens sometimes. Well Wed the problem kept getting worse. she was exasperated she did not want to talk to me. I wanted to see her that night, but her best friend came over (a girl). Anyway, as a joke they changed their FB status to being in a relationship together (which mind you has not been changed), and this was not suppose to be a “big deal” with me. Of course it was.. I over reacted etc. Well Thursday comes, and I go see friends, I wanted to talk to her that night, so we chatted on line briefly (same friend was over that night), anyway, we got into a disagreement, I called and called a few times, no answering b/c she was not going to enable me. We had a talk Friday Morning and worked it out. Went to a baseball game Friday, and a wedding on Sat. Spent Easter Sunday with my family. We came home and were flirtatious and kissing etc. We were acting like nothing was wrong. Got into bed that night, and I was like “I really want to be intimate with her.” so I went for it. .she was like “I am still drained emotionally” of course I over reacted and said “what! are you cheating on me???” of course I acted like a complete DICK and and drama queen. We talked it out on Monday morning,. We were talking on Gmail chat later in the day and she basically said I was not listening to her. Now keep in mind we had a wonderful weekend together doing things that were family oriented (mine and spending time with her munchkin, whom I adore)

You know when this all started, I said to myself I have 3 choices.
1. grow a pair and give her space/time and be a man and get better.
2. continue with my self-destructive pattern and spiral down into an abyss
3. well.. lets not discuss that.. I really don’t like that thought.
I would love some advice from you guys. What to do? Shes an amazing woman. We both have told each other that we are the loves of each other’s lives. And honestly I think we mean it.
I am backing off, as I said earlier. I really truly am. I have been doing things nightly since Tuesday night and the decision to give some space (even though I haven’t honored that until now).
So anyway, after my novel, and btw, I am going back to Therapy on Wed of next week, I am reading self help books, and just trying to get my crap straight.
Other than backing off, and giving her space.. what else should I do? I love this girl. I honestly do!!