Is it time to break up?

I’ve been with my boyfriend for 2½ years now; we started dating my senior year of high school and have made it halfway through college so far. I went to college out of town while he stayed home (he’s younger than me), and I came home every weekend for 2 years so that we could stay together.

Things seem to be going further and further downhill now. When we started dating, things were absolutely wonderful; we didn’t fight once for our first 8 months of dating. Then college came and things became strained, but still manageable. I was a bit of a rebel in high school (as was he), but college quickly whipped me into shape, and I now have a straight A average and am planning to go to medical school. He’s shaped up a bit, but not like I have.

When we fight now, he usually gets extremely angry right off the bat, which causes me to shut down and stop talking. Many times if I have a problem, he tells me that I’m overreacting, that I can’t communicate with him, or that I’m stupid. We fight every week—and he always seems to get his way in our fights.

The only problem is that I’m 100% dependent on him, and I can’t tell if I want to stay with him because I’m truly in love with him or because I have isolated myself the past 2 years in order to be together with him and get good grades in school. I cannot bear the thought of spending the rest of the summer completely alone, to sit and think about the breakup and what could’ve been… I no longer talk to any friends around my hometown because most of them have continued in their “rebellious” ways and I can’t bear to be around that.

He tells me he loves me, and we do have good times together in between the fights. However, I do not trust him; I have caught him smoking pot behind my back twice, both times he became very emotional and extremely regretful of his actions; enough to convince me to stay with him. When we fight nowadays and take time apart, he will make plans with other people, and I always wonder what it is that he’s doing with them…

Sorry for the novel, but this situation is so complicated… He is also moving to my college town in August, and after two years of seeing him only on weekends, I had been looking forward to this time for quite awhile..